A1r

The
Lining
of the

Patch Work Screen;


Design’d for the Farther
Entertainment
of the
Ladies
.

By Mrs. Jane Barker.

London,
Printed for A. Bettesworth, at the
Red Lion in Pater-Noster Row. 1726MDCCXXVI.

A1v A2r

To the
Ladies.

You may please to remember,
that when we
left our Galecia, it was
with the good Lady, to
partake of the Autumn Diversions
in the Country; as Horse-
Races, Dancings, Assemblées, Plays,
Rafflings, and other Entertainments.

These being over, some Business
of consequence call’d her to London,
whether Masquerading, or Tossing
of Coffee-Grounds, I know not; A2 but A2v
but probably the latter; it being
an Augury very much in vogue,
and as true, as any by which Sidrophel
prognosticated, even when he took
the Boy’s Kite for a blazing Comet; See Hudibras, Part 2. Canto 3.
and as useful too as Scates
in Spain, or Fans in Moscovy; whatever
was the Motive, our Galecia
must needs ramble, like others, to
take London-Air, when it is most
substantially to be distinguished,
in the midst of Winter.

Here it was I found her, and
often had her Company, receiving
from time to time an account of
her Adventures; which I have kept
together, in order to make a Lining these A3r
these Pieces being much larger than
the others, I think we must call
it Pane-work; which, I hope, will
be acceptable to your Ladyships,
you having pleas’d your selves with
this kind of Composure in your
Petticoats; which, methinks, bears
some resemblance to Old London,
when the Buildings were of Wood
and Plaister. I wish, Ladies, you
don’t condemn this my lining to
the same Fate.

Well, be it so; if it have but
the honour to light your Lamps for
your Tea-kettles, its Fate will be
propitious enough; and if it be thus
far useful, I hope, you will not
think there is too much of it. For
my own part, I fear’d there would
hardly be enough to hold out measure
with the Screen.

A3 This A3v

This made me once think to
have enlarg’d it, by putting in
some Pannels of Verse; but, that
I heard say, Poetry is not much
worn at Court; only some old
Ends of Greek and Latin, wherewith
they garnish their Dedications,
as Cooks do their Dishes with Laurel
or other Greens, which are commonly
thrown by, as troublesome
to the Carver, whatsoever Poetry
may be by the Reader.

Wherefore, I hope, your Ladyships
will easily excuse the want
of this kind of Embellishment in
my Dedication; remembring, that “One Tongue is enough for a Woman.”

But A4r

But perhaps, it may be said,
that this is an old fashion’d, outof
the-way Proverb, used only when
Ladies liv’d at their Country-Seats,
and had no occasion for the Jargon
of Babel; their Cooks, Gardiners,
Butlers, Waiting-women, and other
Servants all understood, and spoke
the same Language, even old English:
But now ’tis otherwise; and that
which God sent for a Curse on
those presumptuous Builders, is
now become the distinguishing Mark
of good Breeding.

How this Alteration came to
pass, or when it began, I do not
well know. But some say, it was
in the Year when the first Colony
of buggs planted themselves
in England.

O- A4v

Others affirm, it was at the same
time that jinn broke down the
Banks of our Female Sobriety, and
overflow’d the Heads of the whole
Populace, so that they have been
brain-sick ever since: But I am
not Antiquarian enough to enter
into this Dispute, much less to
determine it; only thus far, if I
may speak my simple Thoughts, I
believe it was in Oliver’s time, when
the Saints and the Ungodly spoke
a Dialect so different, that one
might almost take it for two Languages.

But after all, Ladies, I should
be very proud to find something
amongst Authors, that might embelish
my Dedication so as to make it A5r
it suitable to your Merits, and my
Book worthy your Acceptance.

I would most willingly, rifle
Boileau, Racine, and hunt Scaron
through all his Mazes, to find out
something to deck this my Epistle,
till I made it as fine as a May day
Milk Pail, to divert you with a
Dance at your Closet-doors, whilst
my Crowdero-Pen, scrapes an old
Tune, in fashion about threescore
and six years ago; and thereby testifie
that I am passionately desirous
to oblige you.

Since you have been so kind to
my Booksellers in favour of the
Screen, I hope, this Lining
will not meet with a less Favourable
Reception from Your Fair A5v
Fair Hands: Which will infinitely
oblige

Your Devoted Servant,

Jane Barker,

The A6r
The A6v B1r 1

The
Lining
to the
Patch-Work Screen.

Galecia one Evening setting alone
in her Chamber by a
clear Fire, and a clean Hearth,
(two prime Ingredients towards
composing the Happiness
of a Winter-season) she
reflected on the Providence of our All-wise
and Gracious Creator, who has mercifully
furnish’d every Season with its respective
Comforts to sustain and delight us his poor
Creatures: The Spring, for example, with
its Sweets of Buds and Blossoms; the Musick
of the singing Birds, which hold Concert
with the whistling Plough-man, committing
his Seed to the Earth, in hopes of
a plentiful Harvest: Next, the Summerseason,B season, B1v 2
with its Fields cover’d over with shining
Corn, and the Meadows with Haycocks;
all inviting the industrious Farmer to
come and receive the Fruits of his Annual
Toil and Sollicitude. This happy Season
being past, comes the Autumn, with its
laden Branches, to fill the Vats with Wine
and Cyder; as also the Hogsheads with
well brew’d October, to gladden the Feasts
when seated with Friends by good Fires,
those benign Champions that defend us
from the Inclemencies of Winter’s Fury.
Thus the Year is brought about; and tho’
I have not the Society of Friends by my
Fire-side (said she to her self) yet God has
given me the Knowledge of Things, so far
as to be able to entertain my Thoughts in
this Solitude, without regret; when the
Coldness of Friends, or rather the want of
Riches, deprives me of their Company
these long Winter-Evenings.

In these Cogitations, she cast her Eyes
towards the Window, where she beheld the
Full Moon, whose Brightness seemed a
little to extend the extream Shortness of
the Days, when Dusk calls for Candles to
supply the Sun’s Absence. This brought to
her mind the Thoughts she had in her
Childhood on this Subject: For then she
had a Notion (whether taught by her Nurse, or B2r 3
or otherwise) that the Old Moons were given
to good Children to make them Silver
Frocks to wear on Holidays.

As she reflected on this infant Conceit,
she began to consider whether she had improv’d
in her riper Years. Alas, said she
to her self, what have I spoke or acted more
consonant to good Morality, than this
Conceit in the State of mine Innocence?
For after we have pass’d this contemptible
Stage of Weakness both of Mind and Body,
we enter into a State of Danger and Temptation;
and if by chance we escape the
Snares laid to catch our heedless Youth, we
then walk on in a rough Road of consuming
Cares and Crosses, in which we often stumble
or fall; and if we rise again, perhaps it
is to meet with greater Dangers, in Sickness,
Sorrows, or divers Temptations, to
which we too often submit, thro’ our Rashness
or Inadvertency.

When the Blossom of Youth is shed, do
we bring forth the Fruits of good Works?
Do we relieve the Poor, any way within
our Power? Do we instruct the Ignorant,
comfort the Afflicted, strengthen the Doubtful,
or assist the Feeble, with other Works
of Mercy corporal and spiritual?

She was thus ruminating, when a Gentleman
enter’d the Room, the Door being
a jar. He was tall, and stood upright beforeB2 fore B2v 4
her; but not speaking a word, though
she look’d earnestly upon him, could not
call to mind that she knew him, nor could
well determine whether he was a Person or
a Spectre. At last she ask’d him, who he
was; but he gave her no answer. Pray,
said she, tell me; if you are a Mortal, speak;
still no Answer. At last, with an amazed
Voice, she said, pray, tell me, who, or what
you are. I am, said he, your old Friend
Captain Manly: At which she was extreamly
confused, to think that she had so weak
an Idea of so good a Friend, as not to know
him, he having been many Years absent;
not knowing whether it proceeded from
a Change of his Person in that time, or
Dimness of Sight, between Moon-shine and
Fire-light. But calling for a Candle, she beg’d
a thousand Pardons, engaged him to sit
down, and let her know, what had so long
conceal’d him from her Correspondence.

The B3r 5

The Story of
Captain Manly.

Dear Galecia, said he, though you partly
know the loose, or rather lewd Life
that I led in my Youth; yet I can’t forbear
relating part of it to you by way of Abhorrence.

Then it was I married a rich Widow-
Lady, thereby to gratifie my Pride, Luxury
and Ambition; for Love had no part in the
Espousals. I knew, that her Fortune, Friends
and Interest would soon place me in a Station
to my Liking, where I might enjoy
my Bottle and my Friend, and, when I
pleas’d, a little Cocquet-Harlot. These
things were the chief of my Ambition:
For I did not aim at benefiting my King
or Country by my Services, into what state
soever I might be advanc’d; but to gratifie
my Pride and Vanity in embroider’d Cloaths,
long Wigs, fine Equipage, and the like: Which
Vanity is excusable also, when the intention
is to grace the Monarch we serve, or to
honour the Family of which we are descended:
But my Design was only to please
the Eyes of the Fair, and make me the B3 Sub. B3v 6
Subject o ftheirof their Prattle, when Ombre-Tables
and Assemblées call them together; or to
over-hear them in the Mall, saying, “No
body had a better Fancy in Dress than Captain
Manly.”

When Days of Muster call’d us out to
Review in the Park, then the shewing our
fine Saddles, Holsters and Housing, were
more my Concern, than teaching my self
or my Soldiers their Duty. And when I
returned, I fansied I had undergone a great
Fatigue, and could go no further than
Locket’s or Paulet’s, send my Horses home,
charge my Man to be sure to have my
Chariot ready to carry me to the Play in
the Evening. And alas! my Business there,
was not to admire the Wit of the Poet, or
the Excellency of the Actors in their respective
Parts; but to ogle the Ladies, and
talk to the Masks; and when I found one
witty or well-shap’d, take her with me to
the next Tavern to Supper. Thus, at coming
out, with my Strumpet in my hand,
assaulted and surrounded with a number of
miserable Objects, I could step into my
Chariot without relieving their Wants, or
considering them as my Fellow-Creatures.
Now, was not this valiantly done, to venture
without any Weapon, but scornful
Looks, to charge through a Set of miserable
Creatures, for daring to ask Alms of so great B4r 7
great a Beau? not reflecting, what great
Lord had sent them, even the Lord of Heaven
and Earth, whose Raggs were their
Credentials, and their Sores the Badges of
being his Messengers.

Thus far, Madam, I acted the Part of
a Beau-Rake, till a Salivation and a Sweating-Tub
call’d upon me for a more regular
way of Intriguing: And even in this I ran
the risque of a Chance-medly Venture, like
those that hope to make their fortune by
Lotteries.

One Evening at the Play I saw a pretty
young Creature, very well dress’d, without
Company or Attendants, and without a
Mask (for she had not yet learn’d so much
Impudence, as to put on that Mark of Demonstration.)
This Fort I attack’d, and
found it not impregnable. She consented
to a Parley at the Tavern; but told me withal,
that I was greatly mistaken if I took
her for a lewd Person; for she was not so,
but a vertuous Maiden-Gentlewoman. The
truth is, I knew not how to spell, or put
together this seeming Contradiction: For
to pretend to Vertue, and yet consent to
go to a Tavern with a Man wholly a
Stranger to her, I did not understand. In
short, we supp’d at the Tavern; but
whether she or the Drawer, by her Instigation,
put any thing in my Liquor, I know B4v 8
know not; but so it was, I went drunk
to bed, and in the Morning had forgotten
what had pass’d, and was greatly amazed to
find a Woman in bed with me. We fell
into Discourse; and she frankly told me her
Name and Family, which greatly amaz’d
me; and that she was a Virgin, which
more and more confounded me; and then
she told me the Cause of this Adventure:
For, said she, I liv’d beyond my Fortune;
and when that fail’d, I knew not what to
do, for I could not work, and am asham’d
to beg; nor, indeed, could I reasonably
hope to be reliev’d, being in Youth and
Health; for Charity is seldom extended to
such Persons, be their Birth and Education
what it will; Humility and Industry
are the Lectures preach’d, and the Alms
given on such Occasions: I will not argue
(continu’d she) how far that way is right or
wrong; but finding my self reduced to
Distress, resolved to take hold on the first
Opportunity that presented it self, either to
marry, or live with any Gentleman that
would like my Person so well as to take me
either of these ways, into his Protection.

I extreamly lik’d the Frankness of the
Girl, together with her Person, which was
truly handsom; and after a little farther
Discourse, I honestly told her, that I could
not marry any body, having a Wife already;dy; B5r 9
but the other way I was willing to
take her, and therefore bid her look out for
a House, and meet me again the next Night
at the Play, and I would then take further
measures: I offered her a Guinea; but she
generously refus’d it, saying, “It was not
come to that yet, to accept a Guinea for a
Night’s Lodging”
, and so departed, promising
to meet me at the Play.

This generous Behaviour surpriz’d me;
and if at first I lik’d her, I now esteemed
her, and thought there was something extraordinary
in the Creature, thus to refuse
the Figure of the most amorous Monarch
in the Universe, on a Piece of Gold, the
Thing she so much wanted, as to sacrifice
her Vertue and Honour for its sake. I began
to make her an Heroine, or petty Goddess
in my Thoughts; her Beauty stamping
on her the Character of one, and her Generosity
of the other. I pleased my self
with the Thoughts of becoming a Beau of
the First Rate, in having a handsome House
and a genteel Mistress, with whom to pass
away my idle Hours; or, properly speaking,
to consume my time in wickedness. I often
recounted to my self the Charms of her
Conversation, as well as those of her personal
Beauty; with a thousand other idle
Ravings, which being pass’d, I would return
to my self, saying, “Fool that I am, thus to B5v 10
to delude my Fancy with the hopes of Happiness
in a Strumpet, a cunning Jilt, pretending to
Vertue, the better to disguise her Vices; a Creature
pickt up at a Play, as one does any common
Stroler.”
However, I resolved to keep my
Appointment, if it were but to divert my
my self in bantering her pretended Vertue.
When I came to the Play, I found my
Mistress engaged with another Spark: Then
I reflected what a Coxcomb I had been,
but was glad things had gone no further. I
should have hired a House, said I (in reproaching
my self) to have been the Receptacle
of her numerous Cullies, and furnish’d
it for the service of her Lewdness.
O, what ridiculous Creatures do we Cullies
make of our selves, when we depend upon
a Creature that has abandon’d Vertue and
Honour, in once becoming a Prostitute!
Ah, happy is the Man that has a vertuous
and beautiful Wife: Justly might the wise
Man say, “Her Price is above Rubies.” In which
only Sentence he has proved himself a
mighty Sage.

Thus a thousand Thoughts rambled in my
Head, all the while keeping a spiteful Eye
on my beautiful Deceiver. I watch’d her
going out with him, and saw them take
Coach together in a dirty Hack; which
grated my Pride, to see the Jilt prefer
that to my fine Equipage, and a plain Country- B6r 11
Country-Gentleman (as he seemed to be)
before a Spark of the Town. I was much
out of humour all the Evening, nor was it
in the power of Bottle or Friend to divert
me: If Ben Johnson or Hudibras had been
there, I must have remained dull and illhumour’d.
I am ashamed to tell you, the
great Anxieties of Thought in which I past
that Night; but Sleep, I am sure, had a very
small share of that time allotted by Nature
for our Refreshment. The Morning
was not much better: I could scarce be
commonly civil to those Friends that did
me the honour to come to my Levée. When
drest, I went to the Chocolate House, in
order to divert my self there amongst the
Fops that frequent that Place; which, indeed,
in some degree quell’d my disturbed
Thoughts, to observe the different Follies of
the Town-Fools; some taking out their
Pocket-Glasses to see how to place a Patch
right upon a Pimple, tho’ there was none
to be found on the Face; others talking of
the Favours of their Phyllis’s and Bellinda’s;
some cursing the Treachery of the Sex;
others taking out their Billets to read over,
for want of Conversation to entertain the
Company; and if there was one more ugly
than the rest, be-sure he pretended to more
Letters and Billets than any body else,
though, perhaps, written by himself, or B6v 12
or some Friend for him; which way soever
it was, it served to gratifie his Vanity.
Here, perhaps, I met with some as idly
dispos’d as my own good-for-nothing self, that
when Dinner-time approached, were ready
to go with me to Locket’s; where, at a
costly rate, we found Rarities enough to
gratifie any luxurious Appetite.

Thus, I began by little and little to banish
my false Chloris, who by this time
had but little Interest left in my Thoughts;
so that I knew, a Game at Hazard would
utterly supplant her: For whether I should
win or lose, I knew, the Pleasure or the
Chagrin would equally out-rival her Charms.
It was my luck to win; but I was too vain
to carry off the Money; but immediately
sent for my Barber to bring me one of his
best Wiggs, and to my Semstress for a Suit
of her finest Linen, whether Point or
Lace.

Thus equipt, I order’d my Equipage to
attend me to Hide-Park, where in Fops-
Ring I might ogle at my pleasure, and at the
same time expected my Wigg and Linen
should draw the Eyes of others, especially
those of the Fair. No Author at Will’s
listned more attentively to what was said of
his New Book or Play, than I look’d to
see who ogled these my New Trappings,
or could have more Chagrin if neglected: But C1r 13
But, I think, I was not mistaken; Beaus and
Belles, Prudes and Coquets, all gave a Glance,
at least I thought so; and that pleased my
Vanity as well, as if really so: And now I
began to wonder at my self for having had
the least Disquiet for my Play-house Jilt.
I began to be as impatient at my self, as
ever I was at her, to think that such a
worthless Thing should discompose the
Thoughts of such a Hero, as I there counted
my self: But behold what hapned in the
midst of the high Conceits I had built on
such a sandy Foundation. Here comes by
my Miss, in a Coach, and the Spark I saw
with her at the Play. Their Coach seem’d
to be a Country-Gentleman’s Vehicle; good
Horses, but look’d as if us’d to a Plough
and Cart more than a Coach. He, indeed,
was handsome in Person, only wanted a
little of the Air of our Town Gallants.
And now, after all the Tranquillity in
which I thought my self, the sight of this
Slut discomposed me. I was enraged to
think, that she should prefer his dirty Acres
before all my shining Equipage, and costly
Ornaments. I went out of the Park as
sullen as a sick Monkey; I knew not whether
to strole: The Play was my Aversion,
fansying I should see my false Chloris
there. Too soon to go to Will’s or the
Rose, I resolved to take a Turn in the Mall, C tho’ C1v 14
tho’ too soon for the Beau Monde, but
good time for the City and Country-Ladies
to gather the Dust, and spoil their fine
Petticoats. Here I diverted my self as well
as I could, to see the Intrigues, some
beginning, some going on, though but an
old sort of worn-out Diversion to me;
yet it serv’d to sooth my surly Humour at
that time.

I betook my self to a Seat, and there began
to look back upon the Follies of my
Life, and of all such as liv’d in that way,
whose whole Business is Pride, Sloth and
Luxury. We move in a constant course of
Irregularity; I may say, as constant as the
Sun, but with this distinction, his Motion is
to do good, ours Mischief, to our selves,
Neighbours and Families. Methought I
wish’d my self in Shades amongst the Poets
and Philosophers, where wholsome Air and
Innocence procured us Health, that first step
to Happiness: Nay, I thought, if I had a
Wife that was good-humour’d, how many
other Disagreements soever she had belonged
to her, I could make my self easie, and
live honest, without considering that my
Misbehaviour was the Cause of her ill Humour.
I was in these Cogitations, when
one of my wild Companions came and set
himself by me, and ask’d, what made me
so out of humour. Didst thou drink ill Wine last C2r 15
last Night, says he, and so art Maw-sick?
Or has Miss jilted thee? Come, Man, let
us go take a Bottle, wash down Sorrow, and
talk of our Adventures over a brisk Glass
of Champagne: For, to tell truth, Friend, I
am almost resolved to marry, and so abandon
this loose way of living. There’s no
way like it, replied I; and it is certainly
in the Power of a sweet temper’d Woman
to reclaim the worst of us; therefore be
sure to secure that Point, whatever the rest
may prove. That is a Quality I mightily
esteem, replied my Friend, and I hope I
have met with one to my purpose. Prithee
where, or when, said I, tell me your Adventure;
it is pleasant sitting here, and too
soon for a Bottle, so tell me your Intrigue.

The other Night, said he, as I was walking
here a little late, till the Mall began to empty:
I took notice of two pretty young
Creatures, very well dress’d in new
Mourning, with Gold Watches and Tweezers.
They seemed in a great Consternation,
that their Man did not bring ’em
word he had got ’em a Coach ready at the
other side of the Horse-Guard, as they had
appointed, and seemed very uneasie to go
that way without Company or Attendance.
I perceiving their Anxiety, offer’d to wait
on them till they could get a Coach, which C2 was C2v 16
was readily enough to be had as soon as
through the Guard. I put them in a Coach,
and begg’d leave to see them safe to their
Lodgings, which was but in the Hay-Market;
we arriv’d at a handsome House, and as
handsomly furnish’d, a spruce Footman waiting,
whom they rebuked for neglecting his
Attendance in the Park, so that they were
forced to be obliged to this Gentleman
(meaning me,) for which they made me
many grateful Acknowledgments in their
North Country Dialect. They asked me
to drink a Dish of Tea, it being just ready,
saying, they could not pretend to offer any
thing else, they being Strangers in Town,
Lodgers, and not House keepers: They
offered and excused every thing in such a
pretty Country Plainness as charmed me:
So being desirous to creep further into their
Acquaintance, I refused Tea at that time,
begging leave to wait on them in the
Morning, when a Dish of Tea would be
very acceptable: I took my leave, but with
a certain tender Reluctance, such as I had
been never sensible of before.

In the Morning I went, and found a civil
Reception, mix’d with much Modesty;
and in some turns of Discourse, I found
that their coming to Town was to adjust
some Law intanglements, and that their
Stay would not be long: They desired of me C3r 17
me to let them know the nearest Church,
where they might go and offer themselves
and their Affairs to the Protection of Heaven;
so I gave them as good Directions as
I could, withal promising to wait on them
with my Chariot to Westminster and St.
Paul
’s, and that it was at their service on
all occasions, whenever they would honour
me with their Acceptance. In short, they
are so devout, sweet and innocent, that I
have indulged my Fancy to that degree, so
as to resolve to marry the Elder, who seems
not averse to the Proposal; but will determine
nothing till her Guardian comes to
Town: But I hope to unrivet that Fancy;
for you know that my loose way of living
has made a great Hole in my little Estate,
which her Guardian would soon find out,
and perhaps I should be disappointed in the
first Resolution I ever made of marrying.

He had scarce finish’d his Discourse, when
two of the Marshal’s Men brought these
two Ladies by us to carry them to Bridewell,
which we found, upon Enquiry, was for
having pickt a Gentleman’s-Pocket of
twenty Guineas, and withal giving him the
Foul Disease.

This was a surprizing Revolution, and
it was with difficulty that I hinder’d this
my Friend from going to their Rescue. I
alledged to him all the manner of their C3 first C3v 18
first acquaintance, together with its Progress,
as not being consonant to true Vertue
and Modesty; and wonder’d, that he
who knew the Town so well, should be so
easily bubled; but he had attributed all their
Freedom and Easiness of Acquaintance to
proceed from a Country Simplicity, and
Ignorance of the World. After having a
a little descanted on this Adventure, we
resolved to go to the Rose, to wash down
our Disappointments, and try to meet some
of our Acquaintance as they came out of
the Play, and hear what Transactions, what
Intrigues, and other little trifling News
the House afforded that Evening. In order
to which, we posted our selves in a Room
just at the Stairs-head, where we sat talking
over our respective Affairs, as I have just
now related.

And, behold, the first that mounted was
my Mistress, conducted by her Country-
Squire: He bad the Waiter tell his Master
to make haste with Supper, for he did not
intend to stay long. As soon as they were
got into their Room, I asked the Waiter
if he knew that Gentleman? Yes, Sir, said
he, I was born in the same Town with
him, my Father holds a good Farm under
him. And do you know the Lady that is
with him? Yes, said he, she is his Sister.
Are you sure of it, said I? Yes, replied the Wait- C4r 19
Waiter, she and I are both of an Age; and
I believe, said he, they both go out of
Town to morrow early. This was such a
double Surprize, as shock’d me beyond Expression:
For ’tis certain, that, unknown to
my self, I lov’d her as well as any Hero in
a Romance; and had suffer’d as great Anxieties
for the Falshood of which she seemed
to have been guilty: And now, a little
Spark of satisfaction, kindled by this Boy’s
Intelligence, was at the same moment extinguished,
by the thoughts of her going
out of Town, consequently out of my
reach. Thus, we suffer our selves to be
hurried by irregular Passions, throwing Reason
out of her Regency, and permit our
selves to be governed by a thousand Crimes,
Follies and Impertinencies. In short, we
sat down over our Bottle, to divert our
Chagrin, and heighten our Satisfaction:
For we had a mixture of both, his Mistress
proving a vile Jilt; nevertheless, it being
discovered in time, e’re too late, was a
Consolation; mine proving an honest
Whore (if one may so word it:) But the
Proof came too late to retrieve the Loss
of her out of the Dominion of her Brother.
In short, we pass’d our time as agreeably
as our Circumstances would permit, till
Sleep called us to our respective Lodgings,
and mine that Night was at my own House: C4v 20
House: And, I believe, if my Wife could
have received me with good Humour, I
should then have become a tolerable good
Husband: For I was so chagrin’d with
this Adventure, that Lewdness became
nauceous to me; and I believe, there are
few Husbands so abandoned, but a sweettempered
Woman might find an Interval
to reclaim: But I was not so happy in this
Juncture.

In the Morning, according to custom,
to the Chocolate House I went; here a
Letter was brought me by an elderly
Woman, who told me, she was ordered
to deliver it into my own Hands; which
was to this purpose, as near as I can remember:

“‘Sir, You may very well reproach me, that you have
not heard from me in so many Days, and for
not having obey’d your Orders in seeking for a
House: But when you know the Cause, I’m sure,
you will readily forgive the Neglect. ’Tis this: My
Brother having heard of my frequenting the Playhouse,
and admitting the Courtship of several Lords and C5r 21
and Gentlemen (tho’ I can safely affirm, I never
granted any Favours but to your self.) This brought
him to Town, to persuade me to go with him into
the Country, which is really my Aversion. Nevertheless,
he treated me so kindly, entertaining me
with all the Diversions of the Town, and us’d so
many cogent Arguments, that I could scarce hold
out against his kind Offers. How much I suffered
in my Thoughts pro and con, is too tedious to
repeat; laying before my self the poor Life I should
lead under the Conduct of a Sister-in-law, wholly a
Country-Gentlewoman, and a Prude into the bargain,
and young Nieces growing up to despise, and perhaps
grudge the Bread that I eat, and much more the
Cloaths that I wear; and I knew I had not wherewith
to bribe them to Respect by costly Presents.
On the other hand, the Scandal of being a kept
Miss, or Left-hand Wife, the Decay of Beauty,
which necessarily entails the Contempt of a Gallant,
&c. In short, my Brother took me to the
Play last Night, and was so very obliging, that I
had resolved to go next Morning with him into
the Country. But, Ah! coming up the Stairs at
the Tavern, I saw you, my dear Captain. This
dash’d in pieces all my Intentions toward the Country:
I could not leave my Manly, my beloved
Captain: No, I resolved to be Concubine, Strumpet,
or whatever the malicious World would call me,
Terms invented by great Fortunes and ugly Faces,
who would monopolize all the fine Gentlemen to
themselves. I say, for your sake, I will undergo the C5v 22
the worst of our Sex’s Character. And now, that
my Brother is gone out of Town, I shall have Opportunity
to take measures with you; and will meet
you at the Play house this Evening, who am, Sir,
Your Humble Servant,
Chloris.’”

Thus was I again catch’d faster than ever:
Her abandoning her self and her
Family, drew fast that Snare, in which her
Beauty had before intangled me. And sure,
the most severe part of Mankind cannot
wholly condemn me, though I greatly condemn
my self, and humbly beg pardon of
Heaven.

I met her according to Appointment; and
not to clog your vertuous Ears with what
amorous Nonsence pass’d, she told me, she
had found a House for our purpose, in a
Quarter of the Town where neither of us
were known. I gave her a Purse of Gold
wherewith to furnish an Appartment and
other Necessaries; all which she perform’d
with Expedition, and every thing was accomplish’d
with Neatness and Conveniency;
and thus, vile Adulterer as I was, I establish’d
my self with my Harlot.

And C6r 23

And now I liv’d in a regular way of
Lewdness; I pass’d my Days in Jollity, and
slept in the Bed of Adultery, till Heaven, alljust
and good, awak’d me out of this my
impious Delirium, by the Revolution which
soon follow’d. I will not tell you what
different Thoughts attack’d me on this occasion,
lest in some things I shou’d give offence;
but I assure you, I was greatly embarrass’d
between Love, Religion and Loyalty; that
if I was to write down the many Disputes
I had with my self, it wou’d make a Book
as big as Fox’s Martyrology. Let it suffice to
tell you, that my Wife perceiving that I had
some inclination to close with the new Government,
and my Miss, on the other hand,
thinking I would go away, they both made
their respective Interest according to their
Fancies, my Wife to have me disobliged,
that I might get me gone, and so rid her of
the Company of an ill Husband; Cloris, that
I might be prevented from going, that she
might retain her beloved Gallant. But so
it was, between these different Interests, I
was clap’d into Prison even Newgate. Thus,
we see how different Extreams produce the
same Effect, as Glass is made by the Extreams
of Heat and Cold: When the Government
had got their Affairs in a pretty good posture
in Ireland, that my Liberty could do the King no C6v 24
no service, I was let out of Prison. However,
the Confinement had so disobliged me,
that it answered my Wife’s Intentions; and
I went away to St. Germain’s, leaving Cloris
to shift for her self in finding a new Gallant.

When I came there, I found the Court
in a melancholy way, things going but ill
in Ireland, and long it was not e’re the King
came back to France. Here I found, I cou’d
do his Majesty no Service, there being more
Officers come out of Ireland than cou’d be
imploy’d; so that many remain’d chargeable
Pentioners; amongst these, his Majesty offer’d
me Subsistence, which was a Favour
I did not accept, they having born the Heat
and Burden of the Day, lost their Estates
and many of them advanced in Years, &c.
So that I being young enough, resolved,
to try my fortune, as many others did, in a
Privateer, the French being then very successful
against the English and the Dutch:
But it so hapned that the English took a Privateer
bearing King James’s Commission, and
hanged ’em all as Rebels to their Country.
This disappointed us all, in particular my
self, who would not be a burden to the King
in his narrow Circumstances: Wherefore I
resolv’d to try my fortune in a Voyage to the
Indies; accordingly I went aboard a French
Vessel, resolving to try what Success I should have D1r 25
have in Merchandize: I lay’d out all the
Money I had, and what I cou’d get out of
England: And thus set sail from Brest for
Martinico, a Settlement in the North Indies
belonging to the French. The Weather was
good enough, nor did we meet with any Accident
so considerable, as to be worth repeating,
till we got off the Madera Islands; and
then a vile Pyrate attack’d us: We made
what resistance we could; but they soon became
our Masters, carry’d us into Algier, and
there sold us for Slaves. Judge, dear Galecia,
what a poor Station this was to me, who
had indulg’d my self in Delicacy and Luxury.
However, of a bad station, it was
not the worst; for the Person that bought
me was a Widow, whose Husband dy’d a
Christian, (as I learnt afterwards) which I
suppose, made her more kind to Christian
Slaves; for I was not employed in hard laborious
work, but to feed the Hogs, fodder
the Beasts, take care of the Poultry,
&c.

We had another Christian Slave, who
had been there some Years, and had by his
just Dealings gain’d so far upon our Mistress,
that she made him Ruler over the other
Slaves; he govern’d and was obey’d as if
he had been a circumcised Free-man or
Native. By little and little this Man and
I grew more acquainted; when I found he D was D1v 26
was a Roman Catholick Priest; and by degrees
learn’d, that he had secretly converted
and baptized our Mistress’s Husband
before he dy’d, who had recommended
him to his Wife, to be good to him,
and as soon as she had settled her Affairs,
to give him his Liberty and wherewithal
to convey him into his own Country, which
was Italy.

This good Woman had a great Favour
for the Christian Religion, but had not
Courage to profess it. The truth is, the
Severities against it are so great, that it
is not to be done without Loss of all
things and Hazard of Life, to those that
are Natives; But for others, as Traders,
and Travellers, &c. they live there thoroughly
at their ease, together with their
Families; and walk their Processions even
in the Streets of Constantinople.

The longer I lived here, the more I
grew in favour with my Mistress; insomuch
that I liv’d easie, and as happy as any of
her Domesticks that were Free-men. She
being thus good to us, we endeavour’d
to compensate her Goodness, by giving
her a thorough Understanding of our holy
Religion. We got her the New Testament
in the Turkish Language; the Story of
which is so surprizing, and beyond all
to which their Alcoran can pretend, that she D2r 27
she was almost perswaded to be a Christian.
What stuck with her some time, was,
she could not tell how to conclude this
History Authentick, much less sacred;
But we made it plain to her, how it
had pass’d through so many Ages, though
oppos’d by the greatest of Human Powers,
subtilest Knowledge, and its Professors persecuted
to Death; yet they never endeavoured
by Rebellious Armies to establish
their Doctrine; but by patient and meek
Suffering, became victorious, and that
thus the Kingdom of the Holy Crucified
Jesus was establish’d almost throughout the
Universe. This we demonstrated to her;
as also, how, lastly, the Ottoman Empire
was set up, and how it began with Rebellion,
was carry’d on with Injustice,
War and Rapine, and established in a
compound Religion, of Jew, Heretical Christian
and Old Heathenism. These, and the
like things the good Italian Priest made
out to her so clear, that she no longer
doubted the Truth of the Christian Religion;
but durst not venture on it in
that Country; but chose rather to make
off, and convert her Estate into Money,
and fly with us into Europe. But here started
another Difficulty, that it wou’d look
strange in the Eyes of the vertuous European
Women, for her to come away and D2 tra- D2v 28
travel, by Sea and by Land with two
Men, and neither of them her Husband,
nor otherwise related to her. Hereupon
she propos’d to make one of us Master of
that considerable Fortune she possess’d, together
with her Person, which, was truly
agreeable; not, said she, that I have any
affection for either of you, above that of
Friendship: For, believe it, all amorous
Inclinations, are gone into the Grave with
my dear Husband; but for Security of
my honour, I make one of you this Proposal.
The good Priest answer’d her very
respectfully, that He being an Italian Priest
was vow’d to a single Life. Then she
cast her Eyes on me, expecting my Answer;
whereupon I threw my self at her
Feet, saying, Madam, in this gracious Offer,
you make me doubly your Slave;
therefore I shou’d be the worst of Miscreants,
should I abuse your Bounty, in concealing
from you a material Truth, which
prohibits me from accepting the Honour
you offer. Be pleas’d to know, Madam,
that I am a married Man, and have a
Wife at London, so that according to our
Christian Law I cannot be Husband to another,
till well assured that she is no longer
living: But as to that Scruple, you make
of going along with us, I beg you to
dismiss all apprehensions, and be assured, that D3r 29
that you shall be very safe under our
Conduct: (For I, Madam) will defend your
Vertue and Honour to the last drop of
my Blood. She paus’d a while, and said,
she was extreamly satisfied with our open
Sincerity, and was resolv’d to commit her
self and her Fortune to our care, and
with us take a Voyage into Europe, for
the sake of that Holy Religion we had
taught her; and accordingly, took convenient
measures to dispose and make
off this her Country-Estate, under pretence
of retiring from the Fatigue of Rural
Incumbrance.

We concerted with her all due Measures
for our Flight into Europe: Father Barnard
(for that was the Name of the Priest) being
better acquainted with the Turkish Ways
and Language, undertook to get an European
Vessel, which he soon did at the Port
of Algier; thither we came to him, where
we found he had got an Italian Ship ready
to set sail: We had a fair Gale, a
smooth Sea, and a pleasant Serene Air;
all which Heaven blessed us with for the
sake, perhaps, of this good Woman, who
for the cause of Truth, forsook Friends, Kindred,
and native Country. When we were
got off the African Coasts, she press’d to
be baptized, which was perform’d by Father
Barnard, in the Presence of most of the D3 Ship’s D3v 30
Ship’s Crew, who devoutly joyn’d in Prayers
and Praises to God. Thus we had
a very pleasant Voyage, without Danger
or Difficulty. However, there is a little
remarkable Story the Captain of the
Vessel told us which I cannot omit relating.

The Captain had a very pretty Boy with
him, to whom he shewed great Kindness
or rather Fondness; which made us
at first take him for his Son; but when
he undeceiv’d us, we asked him what degree
of relation he bore to him? He told
us, none at all; but, said he, I will
give you a particular Account of this
Child.

I had been a Voyage in the Northern
Seas, and return’d safe with a good Cargo;
when I came ashoar I met with some Merchants
who bad me kindly welcome, and
ask’d me if I had brought store of such
and such Goods; I told them, yes. They
desir’d me if it was possible, to help them
to some Parcels of them, there being a
great Fair or Mart to open at that Place the
day following. Hereupon I call’d two or
three Sailors, that were come ashoar with
me, and told them these Merchants would
reward them if they would go to the Ship,
and fetch those Parcels of Goods ashoar,shoar, D4r 31
which they readily undertook. In
the mean time, I went with the Merchants
to take a Glass of Wine, bidding the Fellows
come to us at such an Hour.

There we stay’d many Hours; we drank,
we supp’d, and fretted at our staying so
long; we play’d, we slept, still no Return
of our Sailors. Thus we passed the Night
in Expectation, to no purpose, and in the
Morning we departed about our Business.
I enquired from place to place wherever I
thought of any probability to find them,
but could get no intelligence; I got a Boat
to convey me to the Ship, not doubting
but I should find them there: but the Ship’s
Crew had neither seen nor heard of them,
which greatly amazed me. I then lookt
out some Goods, and sent to the Merchants,
regulated my Affairs in the Ship, and when
it was Evening went to Bed, having wanted
Rest the Night before: Where lying in
my Cabbin between sleep and wake, I heard
a Noise of Feet coming down the steps;
but I kept my self quiet as if asleep, thereby
to prevent any body speaking to me.
But as I lay thus, one cry’d, “Master”, three
or four times, before I would speak; then
opening my Eyes, I saw the Three Sailors
that had been sent the Day before to look
the Merchants Goods; at which, my Anger
excited me to use Seamens rough Language, in D4v 32
in bidding them be gone, and leave me to
my Repose. Patience, good Master, said they,
and hear us; we are no longer living Mortals:
For we, together with your Boat,
were cast away Yesterday, and drowned.
To which I replied with Scorn and Anger,
that I doubted not but they had been drowned
in good Ale or Brandy, by which their
Senses were lost; therefore bid them be
gone to sleep, and not stay there to disturb
me who was sleepy, through their last
Nights Negligence. Indeed, Master, said
one of them, you judge amiss; for we are
truly and really dead, and what you see,
are only our Ghosts. Give me your hand,
said I, that I may feel. Whereupon one
of them held out his Hand, which I caught
at, thinking to hold it fast, but I felt nothing;
at which I was greatly amazed; nevertheless
I did not lose the Power to speak
to them; but ask’d them, why they came
to trouble me, if they were dead. To
which one of them replied, saying, Master,
you know you owe me so many Months
Pay; which Money I desire you to employ
in paying my Debts. The next said, that
the Money I ow’d him, he desired I would
with it put his Boy to School, and when
he was big enough, take him with me to
Sea. I told him, I knew not how to promise
him that, having Children of my own, D5r 33
own, in particular a Son, who would be of
fit Age at the same time. To which he
added to his Request, saying, Sir, if you
should have a good Voyage next time you
put to Sea, will you promise me then to
take him? I told him I would: So this Boy
to which you see me so kind, is he; for I
had a very good Voyage, and failed not to
perform my Promise. I ask’d the third
Sailor what he wanted; but the other Two
told me, that he was not permitted to speak.
After this, they all three bow’d, and vanish’d,
which greatly amazed me; for till
then, I could not tell what to guess about
their being cast away, they look’d so like
true substantial Persons.

Thus I have told you all the Relation and
Obligation I have to this Boy, excepting
his own Obedience and Industry, which is
very engaging.

This Relation was very amazing to us,
especially being told by the Person who
transacted it: For tho’ we hear many Stories
of Spirits and Apparitions, and greatly
attested for Truth; yet we seldom meet
with any body that can relate them of their
own knowledge, as did this Captain.

Thus, in one Discourse or other, we
entertained our selves, sailing with a prosperous
Wind, till we arrived at Venice. Here D5v 34
Here our new made Christian was greatly
delighted with the Beauty of this City,
and in particular, with the Glory of the
Churches, and the Solemnity of the Christian
Service, which Father Barnard took
great pains to explain to her; all which she
comprehended extreamly well. And now,
being in a strange Country, without any
Friend or Acquaintance, but us two that
had been her Slaves, she was unwilling to
travel any farther, but determined to fix
there in some Religious House, and in a
peculiar manner dedicate her self to the
Service of the Almighty. Father Barnard
soon found out a convenient Place for this
her pious purpose. We went with her to
the Abbess, who was reported to be (what
she really is) a Person of great Prudence
and Vertue. We told her Ladyship our
Story in few words, and that of our New
Convert; at which she seemed greatly pleased,
giving Glory to God; adding, that it
was her Luck to receive into her House
Ladies of Foreign Countries: For, said she,
I have a beautiful English Woman in my
Convent, whom we beg’d leave to see, that
we might introduce an early Acquaintance
between these two Strangers of far different
Countries. Hereupon my Lady call’d for
the English Gentlewoman, who approached
with great Respect and Modesty. But, good D6r 35
good Heavens! How was I surprized, when
I found it was my Chloris! The first View
was surprizing to us both; which my Lady
Abbess perceiving, ask’d if we were Relations,
or old Acquaintance? At which, Chloris
cast her self at her Feet, and with a Flood
of Tears, in few Words related to her the
guilty Acquaintance between us; and how
the Distractions in England at the Revolution,
caus’d her to look into her self, and behold
with detestation her former Life, which she
resolved to change, from Vice to Vertue, from
Vanity to Piety, and imitate the holy Magdalen
as near as she could. In order to which,
said she, I resolved to seek a Convent wherein
to pass my Days in Penance. But supposing
you, (addressing her self to me) to be gone
into France, after your Royal Master, I would
not direct my Steps that way, but hither,
where you now see me; where I have the
Society of holy Virgins, and the Opportunity
of pious Performances, which I would not
change for all the Riches and Grandeur in the
Universe.

I was greatly delighted with this her holy
Enterprize and encouraged her in her pious
Purposes, and assured her I would pray for
her Perseverance; of which she had no need,
for she was very firm.

I told her, I was going for England, with
a resolution to live with my Wife justly, and faith- D6v 36
faithfully, begged her Prayers for my Performance,
and so took leave.

I saw her no more; but laid hold on the
first Opportunity to come away for England,
leaving Father Barnard to settle and establish
his Convert, which I hear, he accomplish’d
to all their Satisfactions.

Upon my Arrival in England, I found my
Wife dead; and the good Woman, notwithstanding
all the Wrongs I had done her, had
not only forgiven me, but certified the same,
by having made me a decent Settlement. And,
what is particular, upon due Examination, I
found, that this Settlement was made and
signed, the very Day I had honestly own’d
to the Turkish Lady, my having a Wife in
England; that I cou’d not but count it proceeded
from the Hand of Heaven, for my just
Dealings toward that good Lady, at a time
when Necessity urged me to transgress the
Rules of Honesty and Honour.

This Settlement is now my support; without
which I shou’d have been reduc’d to great
Distress, for I had lost and spent all I had in
the World; in which I verified the Old Proverb,

“That a Rolling Stone never gathers Moss,”

The E1r 37

The Gentleman having finish’d his Story,
Galecia waited on him to the Stairs-head;
and at her return, casting her Eyes on the
Table, she saw lying there an old dirty
rumpled Book, and found in it the following
story:
In the time of the Holy War when Christians
from all parts went into the Holy
Land
to oppose the Turks; Amongst these
there was a certain English Knight, who
had passed divers Campaigns, to the Advantage
of the Christians; Detriment to
the Turks, and Honour to himself; at last,
being weary of the War, he return’d home,
loaden with Services done his King, Country
and Relations: He retired into his
own Country, to his paternal Estate, and
by way of Thanksgiving to Heaven, he
erected a Religious House just by his own
Habitation, that he might frequently
join with them in their holy Offices: He
married a fine young Lady, in order to
establish his Family. Thus this pious good
Knight liv’d in Tranquillity of Mind
and Fortune till things took another
turn.

E There E1v 38

There were two young Gentlemen, who
out of a Design of Piety, and the Contempt
of the World, placed themselves in this
holy Retreat, in order to become Votaries
in this Confraternity: But as Temptations
pursue us in all Stations, so here it happened,
that one of these Gentlemen, during
the time of his Probation, cast an
amorous Eye on this Lady, the good
Knight’s Spouse. How far he endeavour’d
to overcome or indulge this guilty Flame,
is unknown; but he grew daily more and
more passionatly in love; which he durst not
discover any way but by obsequious Bows
when he happened in her Presence, or to
pass by her, or the like; which the Lady
return’d with a gracious Mien and Smiling
Countenance, being in her nature courteous
and affable. But as we are always ready
to flatter our selves, so did our Lover, and
took the Lady’s Courtesie for Kindness,
and her smiling Looks for interiour
Affection. This he revolv’d in his Thoughts
from time to time, and Fancy upon Fancy
augmented his Passion. At last, he took the
boldness to write her a very amorous
Letter; at which the Lady was greatly astonish’d
and provok’d, and in her Anger
shew’d it to her Husband. The good Knight
laughed at the Man’s Folly, and advised
his Lady to seem easie, and not discouragerage E2r 39
her Lover, till such time as he should
contrive his Punishment.

The good Knight did not tell his Superiour
his Fault, thinking that would be a
continual Disgrace and Blot upon our young
Probationer, and likewise a sort of Disgrace
to himself and his Lady, that any
one should dare to have a Thought so audacious,
much more to have the Impudence
to own it. Wherefore he resolved to mortifie
our young Lover himself with a good
dry Basting: so he consulted with his Lady,
and engaged her to write a kind Letter
to him, and invite him to come to her
such a Night, forasmuch as the Knight her
Husband would then be from home. This
Letter greatly transported our Lover: He
wash’d, bath’d, perfum’d himself, and got
him fine Linen; and thus equipp’d, he
came late in the Night, when all were in
bed, and quiet, only one Servant to let
him in; who conducted him into the Parlour
to the Knight his Master, instead of
the Lady’s Bed-chamber. Here the Knight
shew’d him his Crime, in that vile Letter
he had written to his Wife, and forthwith
began his Punishment with a good Cudgel,
intending no farther Mischief: But how it
hapned, is unknown; whether the Knight’s
Wrath rose to an Extremity, or an unlucky E2 Chance- E2v 40
Chance-Blow; but so it was, the Lover was
kill’d in the Rencounter.

This put the Knight into a great Consternation,
not knowing what to do. The
Knight’s Servant, persuaded him to lend
him his Help, to get the dead Body over
the Wall of the Convent into their Garden,
which joined to the Knight’s House, supposing
that when the Religious should
come in the Morning, and find him there,
they would conclude, some sudden Sickness
had seized him in that place.

Now, there was one in the Confraternity,
who was always at variance with this
Robert, which was kill’d, (the other’s Name
was Richard.) It hapned, that Richard had
occasion to rise in the Night, and come to
the little House, and there found Robert
placed as aforesaid, Richard not thinking
any thing, attended a while; then began
to call, and bid him come away; but the
dead Man not answering, the other thought
he mock’d him: At last, being enrag’d at
such behaviour, Richard took up a Stone,
and threw at him, which hit him in such
a manner, that he fell down off the Seat.
Richard finding that he was really dead,
believed that it was that Stone had done
the Execution. This put him into a great
Consternation, being assured that it would
pass for Wilful Murther, by reason of that E3r 41
that Variance in which they used to live.
So casting in his mind what to do, he at
length resolved to get the Body over the
Wall into the Knight’s Court, which
accordingly he did, and went and placed
it in the Porch of the Knight’s House,
where he left it.

Now, let us return to the Knight: He
and his Man were extreamly uneasie at
what had hapned, and by peep of Day
open’d the Door, in order to go and listen
at the Wall of the Convent, thinking to
hear something of the dead Body; but, to
their surprize, they found it sitting in their
own Porch, at first not knowing what to
think, whether it was the real Body, or a
Spirit; but on Examination, they found it
was the Body; and what to do with it
they did not know: At last they thought on
the following Expedient:

There was in the Stable, a Horse that
had served his Master in the War: They saddled
this Horse, with his war-like Accoutrements,
and fastened the dead Body on him,
with a Spear in his hand, and so turn’d the
Horse out of the Stable, to run where he
would.

Whilst this was in hand, Richard, who was
in great perplexity what to do on this occasion,
believing himself guilty of the Death
of Robert, and so liable to the Punishment, E3 if E3v 42
if discover’d resolv’d to get away; Thereupon
he went to the Miller, that belong’d
to the Convent, and told him in the Name
of the Superiour, that he must let him have
his Mare to go out this Morning on earnest
Business for the Confraternity. Thus getting
the Miller’s Mare, away he rid; but
was not got far e’er he came within view
of the dead Robert, whose Horse ran neighing
after the Mare. Richard thinking this
to be the Ghost of Robert, which pursued
him for his Murder, cry’d out, O Robert, forgive
me! I did not Murder you designedly;
O forgive me, good Robert; But if nothing
will appease thy Ghost but my Blood, I am
ready to resign my Life to the Stroke of Justice.

By this time the Morning was come fully
on, and People being up about their business,
seeing this Confusion, seiz’d Richard,
who stedfastly own’d the Murder of Robert,
for which he was carried away to Prison;
and would, no doubt, have been executed
as the Murderer of Robert; But the good
Knight hasted away to the King, and laid
the whole Transaction before his Majesty.
The King graciously pardoned the Knight;
Richard was kindly receiv’d into his Convent,
and all things went on in good order: But
from hence came the Proverb,
“We must not strike Robert for Richard.”

By E4r 43

By this time Galecia’s Maid brought up
her Supper; after which she cast her Eyes
again on the foresaid little Book, where she
found the following Story, which she read
through before she went to bed.

The Cause of the Moors Overrunning
Spain.

King ——— of Spain at his Death,
committed the Government of his
Kingdom to his Brother Don ―― till
his little Son should come of Age, to take
the Government upon himself. But Don
――
prov’d a Traytor to his Trust; and
by many false Stories invented against the
Queen and the Prince, so brought things
about, as to make himself be acknowledg’d
and Crown’d King of Spain. Hereupon
the distress’d Queen made her Escape to the
Moors, imploring that King’s Protection;
which he not only generously gave her,
but also aided her with a formidable Army
wherewith to invade Spain, in right of the
young Prince.

The E4v 44

The Usurper of Spain, in the mean time,
made great Preparations to oppose his Enemy
and secure his Kingdom. He had a
Noble General, a Person truly worthy in
all things, excepting his adhering to the
Usurper, and sustaining his unjust Pretentions:
This General he sent with a well-appointed
Army, to oppose the Moors; where
we will leave him for the present, and return
to what passed at Court.

This General had a very beautiful Daughter,
whom the King took into his Protection
in a pecularpeculiar manner, both for her
Father’s Sake, and her own, promising her
Father to marry her to one of the chief
Grandees of Spain, if not to a Prince of the
Blood Royal; in order to which, he plac’d
her in a noble Appartment in the Royal
Palace, gave her Equipage and Attendance
suitable to a young Princess, that her Beauty
might appear with greater Lustre to draw the
Eyes and Hearts of those of the highest
Rank and Quality. But the Success prov’d
otherwise; this over-doing undid all: For
every body began to look upon her as
one prepared to be the King’s Mistress, not
the Wife of any Subject. Her Jewels, Riches,
and Grandeur were look’d upon as
the Garlands to dress her up a Sacrifice to
the King’s Pleasure. Now whither these
Whispers first put it into his thoughts, or that E5r 45
that it was his Design all along, is unknown;
but the event makes it look more
like the latter: For he began to make his
amorous Inclinations known to her, with
the utmost Gallantry and Assiduity, which
she rejected with true Vertue and Modesty,
beseeching his Majesty to dismiss her the
Court, and give her leave to retire into a
Convent, or any distant Country-retreat,
where her Vertue and Honour might
be secure, and his Majesty released from the
Sight of that Face which was a Snare to
his Honour and Christian Profession, with
divers Arguments from time to time to the
same purpose. All which served to render
her the more amiable, and the more inflam’d
that wicked Passion, which already was become
unextinguishable; insomuch that he
resolv’d bon-gre mal-gre to enjoy her; and
accordingly executed his wicked Resolution.
It is not recorded whether he subborn’d
her Slaves, or used open Force; but ’tis
certain he had not her Consent; but on
the contrary, she was so enraged in her
mind, that she thought on nothing but revenge;
in order to which she disguised herself
in form of a Slave and so went directly
to the Army, to her Father; where
casting her self at his feet, she told him
the whole Indignity: Whereupon the General
summoned many of the principal Offi- E5v 46
Officers of the Army, to hear the Story
of this young Lady his Daughter! who
upon her Knees begg’d them, for the sake
of their own Children, to repair the Dishonour
done to her and her Family. This
so touch’d the General, and those noble Officers
about him, that with one accord they
resolv’d on a Revolt, and to joyn with the
Moors, to dethrone the Usurper, and establish
their young lawful King. In this
state we will leave the Army, and return to
Court.

The King having news of this Revolt,
was greatly embarrass’d, not knowing which
way to turn himself: He endeavour’d to
raise new Troops; but alas to little purpose;
for the Hearts of the People were estranged,
and the vile Act which caused the General,
and other Persons of Honour to draw
the Army into a Revolt, opened the Eyes
of all, even his chief Adherents, both in
Town, Country and Court, so that he was
reduced to the utmost Distress, being contemned
by his Servants, abhorr’d by his People,
and the Army in open rebellion. In
the midst of these Dilemma’s, like King
Saul of old, he betook himself to consult the
Devil.

There was a Hill on which stood a strongbuilt
Tower; But by whom, or when
erected, or how it came there, no Record, or E6r 47
or Tradition, gave account; only in general,
’twas called the Devil’s Tower. The
Entrance was so fast lock’d and barricaded,
as render’d it very difficult to open, if attempted,
which was never done, as being
supposed a dangerous Enterprize. However,
in this great Exigence to which this
Usurper was reduced, he resolves to open
this Place, be the event what it will; which
was perform’d with great difficulty, and divers
Persons entered, who were immediately
suffocated, and fell down dead; which was
surprizing at first; but on second thoughts,
it was easily concluded to be the unwholsome
Vapours, so long shut up from Air,
which caus’d that sudden Stop of the vital
Spirits.

Wherefore it was resolved to let it stand
open a few Days, placing a Guard to prevent
any body’s Entrance. In the mean
time, provision was made of many Flambeaux
and Torches, not only for the Service
of their Light, but to help extenuate those
poysonous Particles there gather’d by means
of the want of Air. Thus they entered
the Habitation of the Devil, or the Devil’s
Tower
, vulgarly so called.

They went but a little space till it seem’d
to wind on both hands, but they struck towards
the left; where they beheld with
great Horror a vast Cauldron full of Blood, which E6v 48
which kept continually boiling, but no Fire
was to be perceived: At the same time
they heard a strange Noise of a distinct
Thump, perform’d in exact time and measure.
Then going a little farther, they
met two Monsters dragging one another,
who were lash’d on by other Monsters behind
them, making them cry and howl in
a dismal manner: For they were both to
be put into that Cauldron of boiling Blood.
The Passengers stood aside to give them
way, and then pass’d on, meeting divers
frightful Figures, whether real Monsters
grown out of the foul Particles of that
odious Enclosure, or Phantoms, or Spectres,
they could not tell: But, amongst the
many Yellings and Cries which they heard;
the continual Thump ceased not. Sometimes
they heard a Noise like the Falling
of Water; and going on they perceiv’d a
Machine like a vast Mill which was a most
horrible Sight; for the Grist that was here
ground, seem’d to be Human Creatures.
At another place was a vast fiery Furnace,
wherein were many Monsters marching about,
whether Salamanders, or what, they
could not tell. There were many more
strange and monstrous Appearances, not
easily to be remember’d, much less to be
describ’d; nor could any body conceive
the true natural Cause of these Productions,ons F1r 49
whether a subterraneous Fire heated
that Red Liquor, which appear’d like Blood,
(which Liquor, perhaps, was only Water,
so coloured by passing through Red Earth)
no body could conclude; tho’ every one
made their several Conjectures thereon.

After many strange and astonishing Appearances,
they came at last to a Gate,
whereon were written in great Letters the
following Lines:

Mortal, whoe’er thou art, beware,

Thou go not in this Place too far:

Yet bear this Warning in thy Mind,

Be sure thou dost not look behind.

When they had read these Verses, they
were not only much frighted, but found
the Words reduced them to great Difficulties,
seeming to forbid them to go back: For
they could not do that, without looking behind;
and then again, importing Danger
if they went forward. They weighed these
Considerations a while, till the King’s Inclinations,
together with their own Curiosity,
turned the Balance to a Resolution of
entring in, and proceeding farther. They
soon conquered the Difficulties of getting
the Gate open; so on they went, and found
themselves within the Body of a large round
Room, which was the Tower that appeared F above- F1v 50
above-ground, the rest being a subterraneous
Circle round this Tower.

In the midst of this Place stood a great
Image of Time, with a huge long Club
in his Hand, which he raised and let fall in
due measure; and this caused that astonishing
Thump which they heard from the
first Moment of their Entry. They kept
in their mind, that they must not look behind
them, so resolved to walk round the
Place; where on the Walls they found divers
Inscriptions, all importing Warnings,
Menaces and Miseries to those that came
there. In reading which, they sometimes
stopt to consider the Purport and dubious
Meanings of these uncouth Writings. At
last being got round a good part of the
Circle, they cast their Eyes on the Shoulders
of the Image, and there found the
following Words, which the King read with
an audible Voice:

All Tribulation shall they find,

Who needs will look on me behind.

At the reading hereof they all fell into
a great Consternation, especially the King.
They now very well understood what was
meant by those Words written on the Gate,
“Not look behind”; which they had mistaken,
thinking they were prohibited looking behindhind F2r 51
themselves, or turning back the same
way. Thus, the Devil’s Oracles are always
double and delusive, and such are all his
Temptations, as this wretched King and all
his Adherents soon afterwards found.

They hasted out of the Tower as fast as
they could, fastned and barricaded it up
close, as they found it, and so left it.
The King returned home greatly troubled,
and more embarrass’d now than ever. The
next Day the Tower was totally sunk into
the Ground, and no sign left to demonstrate
there had ever been such an Edifice. Thus
the little Story ended, without telling what
Misery befel the King and Kingdom, by
the Moors, who over ran the Country for
many Years after. To which, we may well
apply the Proverb, “Who drives the Devil’s Stages,Deserves the Devil’s Wages.”

The reading this Trifle of a Story detained
Galecia from her Rest beyond her
usual Hour; for she slept so sound the
next Morning, that she did not rise, till a
Lady’s Footman came to tell her, that
his Lady and another or two were coming
to breakfast with her: Whereupon
she hastned to get her self and her Tea-
Table ready for her Reception.

F2 It F2v 52

It was not many Moments e’er they arriv’d,
and the good friendly Lady presented
one to Galecia, asking her if she remember’d
this her old Friend, after so many
Years Absence? Which at first a little surpriz’d
her; but she soon call’d her to mind.
Ah, said Philinda, (for that was her Name)
I do not wonder you could not know me,
my Afflictions having made me almost a
Stranger to my self: To which the good
Lady replied, That whilst the Tea Kettle
was on the Fire, she might tell Galecia her
short Story e’er it boyl’d: But Philinda beg’d
the Lady to pardon the Confusion which
might occur in this Relation, and recount it to
Galecia her self, her Ladyship knowing every
the minutest Circumstance. To which
the good Lady accorded. Philinda, in the
mean time seeing the little Old Book lying
on the Table, in which Galecia had been
reading over-Night, took the same, and
went into the next Room, and left them to
their Story, being willing to be out of the
hearing of those Calamities, in which she
had been so great a Sufferer.

The F3r 53

The Story of
Philinda,
Related by the Lady Allgood.

This Gentlewoman (said my Lady) had
out of her Frugality saved a little private
purse to her self, unknown to her
Husband; a way which many an excellent
good Wife takes, whether to have something
of their own fancied Property, and
more directly at their Service, or only to
have a little Cash to look on, matters not;
but thus it happened: There was a Gentleman
that wanted a little Sum of forty
or fifty Pounds, wherewith to make up a
Payment of Money unknown to his Wife.
Philinda being this Gentleman’s Friend, he
applied himself to her to help him to
this Sum; to which she accorded, and lent
him the Money privately.

After a while she having occasion to
dispose thereof advantageously, writ a Letter
desiring him to meet her at the Abby, F3 where F3v 54
where she would be at Morning-prayers.
His Wife hapned to receive the Note, and
had the Curiosity to open it, and was seiz’d
with a Jealousie, which destroy’d her Quiet.
However, she made it up again, gave it
her Husband without taking any notice;
he went to the Church as appointed, and
there he met with this his Friend; she
whispered to him, that she had now an Opportunity
to dispose of her Money to advantage,
and therefore desired him to help
her to it if he could, without too great Inconveniency.
He told her, that he had
the Money ready at home, and would go
and fetch it, and come back to her by such
time as prayers were ended. So said, so
done: He went home, and fetch’d it, and
came back to her e’er the Congregation
was dispers’d. They went into a publick
House to pay and receive this Money:
But as ill luck would have it, chop’d into
a House of ill Repute, and so unlucky it
was, that in that critical Juncture there
came Constables and Officers of Justice to
search for Lewd People; and finding him
and her together by themselves, carried her
before a Justice of Peace: Where, she not
reflecting on the Consequence, told a wrong
Name, being loth to be known, in that
odd Circumstance; and happen’d on a
Name that had lately been before the same Justice. F4r 55
Justice. Wherefore, without delay he sent
her to Bridewell. Thus was this good Woman
brought into Distress, Disgrace, Horror
and the utmost Confusion, before she
was aware; For at their being first seiz’d,
she desir’d the Gentleman to slip away,
and take no notice of her; but to leave
her without concern, as if she had been a
common Woman; thinking to deal well
enough with the Constables: For all that
she aim’d at was but to keep it from her
Husband’s Knowledge: But matters going
on as I told you before, she was reduced
to this Distress and shameful Condition,
not knowing which way to turn her self,
to whom to address, or what method to take
for her Enlargement: She thought, if she
told her true Name, and sent for her Husband,
she could hope for nothing but to be
abandon’d, if not prosecuted by him as an
Adulteress. To remain there, and undergo
the Rigour of the Law, allotted for such
Offenders, was hard, or rather insupportable
for an innocent Person: Besides, it could
not be; for her Absence from her House
would soon stir up her Husband’s Enquiry to
find her out.

Thus she weigh’d every thing, but could
pitch upon nothing that had any Face of
probability, to do her any Service; At last,
she resolv’d on the plain Truth, that being generally F4v 56
generally the best Advocate for Innocence;
and so sent for her Husband, and told him
the true State of the Case: But alas, it
was all Words to a Storm, or the North
Wind. He resolv’d, and actually put in
execution the utmost that Law could do
in such a case; Not only being content to
abandon her to the Disgrace which
would naturally ensue; but persecuted
her from Place to Place, from Prison
to Prison; so that Poverty, Prosecution and
Punishment of all sorts, was her lot; nay,
even her own Friends and Relations were
her Enemies, so grossly foul was the Appearrance
of this Transaction.

Thus this good Gentlewoman suffer’d
with great patience, her manifold Afflictions,
attended with the utmost foul Disgrace;
But good Heaven at last made way for her
Justification. The Gentleman that had borrow’d
the money of her, had been hurried
by his superiour Officer to his Post in Flanders.
Which was the Cause he could not
appear in her behalf, when things came
to that great extremity. This Gentleman
receiv’d a cruel Wound in some Skirmish,
which happen’d there; so that the Surgeons
despair’d of his Recovery. Hereupon
he call’d some of his Friends, Gentlemen
of undoubted Honour and Probity,
and begg’d them to receive the Attestationon F5r 57
of a dying Man; which was, that Philinda
was a perfect vertuous Woman, to
the utmost degree that he knew of her;
and that for his own Part, he never had
a thought towards her, other than towards
a Mother or a Sister; And so he related
to them the whole occasion and manner
of that Transaction, which had made so
much Noise in the World, calling the Gentleman
to witness, to whom he had paid
the Money he had thus borrow’d of Philinda,
and had been present when she lent
it to him; without which the said Gentleman
could not have made his Campaign.
This he charged them all on the
Word of a dying Man, to report to Philinda’s
Husband and Friends; which they
did with the utmost Sincerity.

Now this News, with the great danger
the Gentleman was in, rous’d his Wife out
of her Jealousie or Delirium; she went to Philinda’s
Husband, beg’d pardon for all the
trouble she had caused him and his Wife,
declar’d how she had intercepted the Letter,
made them be dog’d to that place where
the Constable found them, and that she
sent him there to seize them, and at the same
time caused her Husband to be commanded
into Flanders; For all which she profess’d
her self truly sorry: and earnestly beg’d,
that as she had contriv’d their Separation, she might F5v 58
might cause their Re-union: which she was
willing to cement with her Tears and constant
Vows offer’d to Heaven for their Happiness.

Thus was the married Couple happily
reconcil’d, and have liv’d together ever since
in great Tranquillity. The Gentleman recovered
of his Dangerous Wound, came
home to pertake of, and increase their
Happiness by reiterated Attestations of
the Innocence of all the proceeding.
On the other side, his Wife promis’d never
to intercept his or any body’s Letters,
perceiving now it was not only a great
Indignity and Breach of good manners,
but a Crime that deserves a Punishment, equal
to that of picking Pockets, breaking a
Lock, or the like.

Philinda and her Husband resolv’d to have
no more separate Purses each from other,
whereby to cause Contention. Thus were
these two Families reunited, and the
Cause of their Disturbance wholly remov’d;
in which the Proverb was fulfill’d,

“After a Storm comes a Calm.”
Breakfast being ready the Company call’d
Philinda from her old Book, in which she was
much engag’d, in particular in one Story, which F6r 59
which (said she) being extraordinary, I
will repeat to the Company as soon as we
have done our Tea, which accordingly she
did, as follows:

Philinda’s story out of the
book.

At the time when the Moors invaded
Spain, there were many Irregularities
committed which are usual wherever the Seat
of War is carried. By this means a beautiful
young Nun, enter’d into an Intrigue
with a Cavalier, of the Army, who
found means, notwithstanding all the Care
and Circumspection of those Places; I say,
they found means to contract an Affection;
nor did they stop there, but promisd
personal Enjoyment, and to live together
as married People, if our Nun could
find a way to get out of her Cloyster.

Now she that could suffer her self to
consent to the Temptation of the Flesh,
the Devil was at hand to help her through,
and found a means for her Escape. toEscape to
the utter breach of her Solemn Religious Vow F6v 60
Vow of Chastity. Thus they went away
together, were married, and liv’d in the
midst of Plenty and conjugal Happiness,
till her Husband’s Devoirs called him to
the Army.

At his going he left a Friend to consolate
and asiistassist her in his Absence;
who truly perform’d the part of a good
Man in all things within his power:
The Army was encamp’d far off, and Correspondence
difficult, which was a perpetual
Affliction to her; many Battels and Skirmishes
were fought, without any News
from him: At last, some of his own Regiment,
sent her word that he was kill’d.
This was an inexpressible Grief to her: She
livd many Days and Weeks in the utmost
Disquietude, using all means possible
to know the truth; but he was Universally
believed to be dead, though his Body was
never found amongst the Slain, nor yet
heard of amongst the Prisoners. The
Friend, that was left with her, was no
less afflicted, and bore a true share of
Grief with our disconsolate Relict: But
Time, which devours all things, by degrees
drank up the Tears of the Widow,
and so far dissipated the Grief of the
Friend, that he began to be sensible of
her Charms, not only those of her Beauty,ty, G1r 61
but was touch’d with that tender Affection
which she daily express’d for the
Loss of his good Friend her Husband:
This Esteem by degrees ripened into Affection,
and from Affection to Passion, till
he could no longer resist making his Addresses
to her. How she received these Addresses
at first, or by what degrees or
steps he climbed into her Affection, is
yet unknown; but so it was, in some
time they were married together, and
lived happy enough, till the suppos’d dead
Husband return’d, which was after they
had been married but a few Weeks. We
will not descant either on the Cause of his
Silence or Absence, whether dangerous
Wounds, Imprisonment, or what else hapned;
but he thought to bring her a pleasing
Surprize in bringing himself into her Arms:
But, alas! the Appearance of his Person
was much more disagreeable, than if it
had been his Ghost. However, she conceal’d
her Sentiments, and receiv’d him
kindly. After the first mutual Caresses
were over, he said he was weary, having
travelled far that Day; therefore would
go lie down on a Couch, in the next
Room,Room. He being thus gone to Repose
his poor weary Body, she in the midst
of her Anxiety, took a wicked thought in
her head, and resolved his death, before G her G1v 62
her other Husband should return; for he
was gone abroad. This execrable Thought
she indulg’d, till he being fast asleep, she
put in Execution, and murder’d this unfortunate
Gentleman; even him, for whose
sake she had broke through the Laws of
God and her Country, dishonour’d her self
and her Family; Him, for whom she had
shed a Flood of Tears, utter’d millions
of Sighs and Lamentations, and was for
divers Months the most disconsolate Creature
living; yet had the Cruelty now to
shed his Blood, who had given her no
provocation; but on the contrary, had
fatigu’d himself to a great degree with travelling
far that day, to arrive at her Embraces.

No doubt, but her thoughts were greatly
perplex’d at what she had done, and what
to do when the other Husband should come
home; which we will leave to the Consideration
of any that shall hear the Story.

When the Husband came, she receiv’d
him with a frighted disconsolate Kindness;
which he perceiving, press’d her to know
the Cause. After some Sighs and Tears,
she told him, that Excess of Love to him
had made her act the most wicked and
detestable of all Crimes, and thereupon opened
the Door where the poor murder’d
Body lay; which Sight fill’d him with the G2r 63
the utmost Horror and Detestation. He
look’d upon her as a bloody and a hateful
Monster, never to be forgiven by God
or Man; then again turning his Wrath
upon himself, for having supplanted his
Friend, before greater assurances of his death,
he lamented him, reproach’d her, hated himself;
she, on the other side, sigh’d, wept, tore
her Háir, suffer’d convulsive Agonies, that between
’em, they acted a miserable Scene
of Horror.

After the first Efforts of their Grief and
Distraction were discharg’d, they began to
consider what was to be done. The Gentleman
thought it was cruel to expose her
to the Hand of Justice, for a Crime she
had committed for his sake, though in its
self most enormous; beside, his Affection
for her, joyn’d with Compassion, for the
Foible of the Sex, he resolv’d on the
following Measures: Which were, that in
the dead of the Night, he himself would
carry the murther’d Body to the River,
which ran just by the Side of the Town,
and cast it therein. This Resolution
they put in practice; first drying up
his bloody Wounds as well as they could,
then wrapt him in a Sheet, and the Gentleman
took him on his Back, and went
softly down Stairs; but as she was following,
she perceived a Foot hanging out, and G2 im- G2v 64
immediately took a Needle and Thread, and
sew’d it into the Sheet: But in her Fright,
by mistake, took hold of the Gentleman’s
Coat, and so fastned that to the Sheet. He
went on with his Load, got safe to the
River, and with a hasty Cast, threw it off;
but the Sheet being fastned to his Coat as
before-said, the Weight of the Dead Body
in that sudden Motion, drew in the living
Man also; where he was soon drowned,
not being in the least able to help
himself, by means of his being fastned to
the dead Body.

Next day these two Bodies being found
thus fastned together, were soon known,
Officers of Justice came to search the House,
examine, and apprehend the Family;
But the miserable Lady, soon confess’d,
and told the Story, for which she received
Punishment from the Hands of
Justice, and in which she fulfilled the Proverb.
“Marry in haste, and Repent at leisure.”

The G3r 65

The Ladies, having thus pass’d the greatest
part of the Forenoon, resolv’d to go
take a walk in the Park, to get them a good
Stomach to their Dinner. Here they
found much Company, it being a very
bright fine Winter’s Day; and according
to custom there were divers sorts of Dresses,
Figures and Shapes of Persons, and
as many different Discourses; Some admiring
the Fineness of the Weather, others
saying it was not natural at that
time of Year; some praising this Lady
for her excellent Fancy in her Dress,
whilst others were blam’d for not suiting
their Dress to their Complexion;
one praised this Lady’s Manteau-maker,
another blam’d that Lady’s Seamstress;
some commended the Chocolate they
had for breakfast, others complaining of
the Oysters they had eat over Night; some
talking of the Opera, some of the Play;
how generous my Lord such an one was
to his New Mistress; how glorious she appeared
in the Box; some talking of what
such a Lady won at Ombre, or lost at Basset;
Who was kept by the one, and who was jilted
by the other; Who had luck in the Lottery,
and who lost in the South-Sea; Who
had hang’d themselves for Love, and who
drown’d themselves for Debt. Good Heavens!G3 vens! G3v 66
said our Ladies, who is there that talks
of any good or moral Vertues? Who serves
God or their Neighbour, who prays with
Devotion, or relieves the Poor; who instructs
the Ignorant, or comforts the Afflicted;
who protects the Fatherless, or supports
the oppressed Widow; who visits the
Sick, buries the Dead, or covers the Naked
with a Garment? Many more things of
this kind they were repeating, till they
perceiv’d a pretty elderly Gentlewoman
following behind them, who for some
time had over-heard their Discourse; for
which she humbly beg’d their pardon, telling
them it was not the effect of Curiosity, but
that she had been a true Sharer in those Afflictions,
caus’d by being abandon’d by Friends
and persecuted by Enemies; But the Almighty
had been her Assistance; that she might
with great truth repeat those Words, “When
my Father and Mother forsook me, the Lord cared
for me.”
The Ladies being a little weary of
walking, and very curious to hear the Gentlewoman’s
Adventures, betook themselves to
a Seat, desired her Company, and to relate
her Story.

The G4r 67

The Story of
Mrs. Goodwife.

In the late Troubles of Ireland, said
she, my Husband betaking himself to
King James’s Party, we were stript of all
we had, our Estate was forfeited, our House
plunder’d, even to our wearing Cloaths; so
that we were reduced to the utmost Exigence.
Being thus distressed, we came away
for England; and I being of an English
Family, came amongst my Friends, to
consult and take measures with them, what
course to take to help us in this our Extremity.
But, alas, being reduced to a deplorable
Condition, with two small Children,
we found but cold Reception, there
having been several Changes in our Family;
some Friends being dead, others
grown up and married, which caused new
Methods, new Establishments, &c. However,
by their help we came to London,
thinking to get away to France; but when we G4v 68
we came hither, we heard that the King
had a greater Burthen of poor Followers
than he knew well how to sustain. We
staid here some time, considering what to
do, or which way to direct our Course,
endeavouring to get some Place or Business
for my Husband, or my self, till we
had spent all we had in the World, and all
that we could borrow of any Friend or
Acquaintance; insomuch that we were forced
to go often supperless to Bed. In the
Morning, when our poor Babes wak’d,
one cry’d, “Mamma, me want Breakfast, me
is hungry”
; the other cry’d, “Pappa, me want
a Bit of Bread, me is hungry.”

These poor Infants thus pealing in our
Ears, my Husband one Morning leap’d out
of Bed, saying, he had lived long enough,
since he heard his Children cry for Bread,
and he had none to give ’em. I seeing him
in this desperate Condition, leap’d out also,
put on my Cloaths, and pray’d him to
look to the Children, whilst I went to
seek out for something.

Thus, down stairs I went, not knowing
whither, or what about. But as I pass’d in
the Entry, my Landlady called to me, as
she was in her Parlour, saying, Mistress,
I believe you are going to the Baker’s;
pray do so much as bring me a Loaf with
you. I went accordingly, and desir’d a Loaf G5r 69
Loaf for my Landlady, which the Baker’s
Wife delivered to me immediately. I stood
a while looking on the Shop full of Bread;
but had not Courage to beg, nor Money to
buy. Whether the Mistress saw, I look’d
with a longing Eye, and a needy Stomach,
I know not; but she said, Mistress, I believe
you want a Loaf for your self; To
which I answer’d with flowing Tears, yes;
but I have no Money to pay for one;
then the good Woman replied, In the
Name of God, take one, and pay for it
when you can; and gave me a good
large Loaf, so I came away joyfully.
Of this, with a little Salt, my Husband,
my self and Children made a comfortable
Repast, washing it down with clear Element.

As soon as we had thus refresh’d our
selves, the good Baker’s Wife, who had taken
notice of my dejected Behaviour, sent
a Servant with some Flower to make us a
Pudding, a Piece of Meat to make the
Children some Broth, together with a Pound
of Butter, in which was stuck an Half-
Crown Piece, to buy us Drink. I was
transported at the good Woman’s Charity,
got on the Pot with speed, and made us a
sumptuous Meal, such a one as we had
not tasted in many Days. When this our
plentiful Dinner was over, I began to considersider G5v 70
which way I might dispose of my
Half Crown to make us live for the time
to come: Which, you will say, was a very
small Sum wherewith to begin any Business,
for a Livelihood.

After revolving divers things in my Mind,
I at last took it in my thoughts to go buy a
little Wheat, and boyl it, and try to sell
Bowls of Wheat; which accordingly I did,
and next Day when my Wheat was ready,
I went with it, with a Basket on my
Arm. I must confess, I had Confusion to
knock at Doors, and ask if they wanted a
Bowl of Wheat; and what was an additional
Mortification, when I took off my Gloves
to deliver my Merchandize, my Hands
discover’d that I was not brought up to
such Business; insomuch, that the Servants
would sometimes take notice, and say, that
these Hands look’d more like the Hands of
one used to sit in a Drawing Room and
play with a Fan, than of one who sells
things about the Streets. How far these
kind of Complements might have given me
Vanity at another time, I know not; but
now they were a true Mortification; for
nothing made this humble Task sit more easie,
than the Belief, that no body knew
me. However, I got as much by this
Day’s Industry, as bought us Food the next. G6r 71
next. Thus I went on, daily leaving my
Husband to take care of the Children,
and get the Wheat prepar’d for the ensuing
Day. And thus did my Husband
content himself in this poor Employment,
for the sake of his dear Babes,
who himself had been bred a Gentleman.

In my going to good Houses to sell my
Wheat, I got many a Piece of boyl’d,
bak’d, and roast Meat, which I brought
home to my hungry Children; nor did
my Husband refuse his Share. By degrees
frequenting those Houses, I got acquainted
with the Maids, so that they trusted me to
sell old things for them, paying me so much
in the Shilling, as I could get for them.
Thus I fell into a little way of Merchandize,
selling at one House what I got at
another. The Cook maid at one House
wanted this thing, the House-maid that;
the Chamber maid this thing to sell here,
the Nurse had that thing to buy there;
so that by degrees I fell into a pretty
Trade of this kind of buying and selling
old Cloaths, and grew so skill’d in
it, that we took a Shop; and by such
time as our Daughter was grown up, we
had a Portion to dispose of her handsomely
in the City. Our Son is our Assistant in this G6v 72
this our Trade, and is our Book-keeper. Thus
Ladies (said she) we have made out the Proverb,
“Something doing, something coming.”
They were all thankful to the Gentlewoman
for her Relation; and the Lady invited
her, with the others, to dinner; but
she excus’d her self to her Ladyship, it
being inconsistent with some Affairs she
had at that time. The Lady and her
Friends, together with Galecia, went with
my Lady to dinner where we will suppose,
they regaled themselves very well;
together with my Lady’s Husband, and
his Friends till the coming of the Punch-
Bowl, drove the Ladies into the Drawingroom,
where the Tea-table attended their
approach. They were scarcely seated when
a Lady came to make my Lady Allgood a
Visit; (for that was our Lady’s Name) who
receiv’d her with Transports of Kindness,
after a very long Absence, she being just
come out of France, where she had been
many Years following the Fortune of King
James. They made her many Congratulations
for her safe Arrival, and divers Inquiries
after the Health and Circumstances
of their Friends and Acquaintance in H1r 73
in those Parts, and the Condition of the
Court of St. Germain’s, since the Death of
the King. To which she answer’d, that
they all acted a melancholy Scene. However,
they had this Advantage, the Change
of Fortune brought every one to a right
understanding of themselves, and a due
Consideration of others. The Poor are become
respectful, the Rich (if such there be)
compassionate, Inferiours are humble, Superiours
are affable, the Women vertuous,
the Men valiant, the Matrons prudent,
Daughters obedient, Fathers obliging, Sons
observant, Patrons readily assisting, Supplicants
gratefully accepting; whilst true Piety
and Devotion are the Cement of all
the other Vertues, to build up a holy
Court, like those we read of in the time
of Constantine or Theodosius. In short, there
is a Pattern, by which every one may
square their Lives, so as to make vertuous
and honest Figures amongst Mankind, and
in some degree honourable also, Vertue and
Honour being inseparable Companions.

The Ladies proceeded to ask her, if she
had had a happy Voyage by Sea and
Land, without any dangerous Adventures?
To which she replied, that all was very
easie and happy; only in the Coach between
Paris and Callis there was a Lawyer, H who H1v 74
who told us a Story carrying something
of Horror along with it; which being
short, if your Ladyship please, I will relate
it: It is something of the Portugueze
Nun
, whose amorous Letters have been the
Entertainment of all the World. Her Story
must needs be acceptable, replied the
Ladies, wherefore, pray proceed to oblige
us with the relation of it.

The H2r 75

The Story of
The Portugueze Nun.

This Young Lady was bred in a
Convent, as are most in those Countries,
the Convents being the general Places
of Education for all Children of Distinction.
When she came to Years of Maturity,
her Parents took her home, in order
to establish her in the World, by marrying
her to some worthy Gentleman; of which
there was one in the Neighbourhood, who
greatly coveted this Espousal: But all the
Persuasions of her Parents, joyn’d with the
Gentleman’s Courtship, availed nothing;
she persisted in her Resolution of becoming
a Religious Dame. Her Mother endeavour’d
as much as possible, to extirpate
these Thoughts, by carrying her into Company,
buying her fine Cloaths, introduc’d
her at Court, Comedies, Opera’s, Balls,
Masques, and all sorts of Diversion, which
diverts the greatest Part of Human kind:
But nothing moved this young Lady from H2 her H2v 76
her Religious Purpose. For all these kinds
of Glories seemed to her as Folly and Vanity,
a Dream without any solid Satisfaction:
That in the end, her Parents consented
to her Return into the Convent.

Here she performed all the Duties of her
Novitiate with perfect Obedience, to the
satisfaction of the Abbess and all the Religious,
that she was receiv’d, and in due
time, profess’d a Member of their Holy
Society, with Joy and Content: In which
she behaved her self with great Prudence,
Vertue and Piety, for divers Years, till the
great War between France and the Allies
broke out. Then it was, that a certain military
Officer came to visit a Relation of
his in the Convent, and brought with him
a French Chevalier, who was an Hugonot,
and came out of curiosity with his Friend,
to see the manner of making a Visit at the
Grate. Now, as it is not permitted for any
young Lady or Nun, to receive Visitors
there, without some Companion, this our
foresaid Nun was appointed to accompany
the other. And, lo, this was the fatal
Moment of our Nun’s Ruin: For she no
sooner saw the Beau Hugonot, but she felt an
Emotion she had never been sensible of before.

When she came to know he was an Hugonot,
she thought it was Compassion that
had disturbed her Interiours, to think that so H3r 77
so fine a Person should live in a wrong
Religion. He, on the other side, was
troubled, to see so beautiful a young Lady
thus confined, out of a whimsical Conceit
of devotion (as his Principles termed it.)
Amongst these Thoughts, divers Glances
shot each against other, and forbidden
Sighs met in a sort of soft Union; whilst
the other Couple of Friends talked of
things indifferent, appertaining to the common
Rode of Friendship. In this way
they continued till the Bell called our
Nuns to Choir and our Gentlemen to their
respective Habitations.

We will not pretend to know or guess,
by what steps of Fancy on Cogitation they
climb’d up to an extream Passion, such as
her printed Letters demonstrate, or how they
first discover’d their amorous Sentiments
each to other, things extreamly difficult in
those Places: But so it was, that he desir’d
to be inform’d of the Catholick Religion,
pretending that no body gave him so rational
an Account, and produced such cogent
Arguments as this Lady. By this means
he was permitted to have frequent access
to the Grate, where she not only entertain’d
him with many devout Discourses, and solid
Arguments, but gave him Books to
read, which he return’d in due time, giving
an account of what he read, in those Books; H3 what H3v 78
what touch’d, and what displeas’d him.
This manner of proceeding blinded the
Understanding of those that accompanied
her to the Grate, and it is to be suppos’d,
that by means of these Books lent and return’d,
Letters were convey’d backward and
forward to each other; not only those in
Print, but divers others, by which means
(no doubt) her Escape was contriv’d; which
was accomplish’d in this odd manner: an
Opportunity offering when one of those
Religious Dames died and was interr’d, that
Night, before the Vault was made up, she
took the pains to lift out the Body and lay
it in her own Bed, and then plac’d a Train
of Fire, which she knew would catch and
set fire of the Bed by such time as she
could be got over the Wall, by Ladders
of Ropes there provided by her Lover, (if
one may so call the Devil’s Engineer.) Thus
she left the House to be burnt with all the
holy Inhabitants, therein contain’d: But
Providence so order’d it, that it was discover’d
before ’twas too late, and extinguish’d
before much hurt, only that Cell with
its Moveables was destroy’d, and the
Body so disfigur’d, that it could not be
known, but was much lamented by the good
Dames, really supposing it to be this our
Fugitive. They lamented their Loss in her
as a Person of exemplary Prudence and Vertue,tue H4r 79
as one in whom shin’d Piety and Wisdom
with their most refulgent Rays; a
Person whose Aspect commanded the Youth,
and her Actions taught obedience to all;
In fine, much they lamented, much they
regretted the Death of this Holy Associate.
In the mean time, she got safe away
with her Chevalier, he having provided for
her all manner of rich Accoutrements, and
took the first opportunity to get married.
Thus she broke her solemn Religious Vow
of Chastity, and the Laws of her Country,
betray’d the Honour of her Family; and disgracd
her Sex and Quality.

They liv’d together in this State, and
had divers Children, till an unfortunate Shot
in the Army finish’d his Days; but not
on such a sudden, but that he had time to
send word to her, by a particular Friend
that he dy’d with great Remorse for what
had pass’d between him and her; and
griev’d to leave her and her Children in so
distress’d and abandon’d a Condition. She
receiv’d this Information with utmost Grief;
she fell into Convulsions, which attended her
Fit after Fit, all the Hours she liv’d, which
were not many. But in one of her Intervals,
she call’d some Friends about her, related
to them all the Story of her criminal
Marriage, greatly lamenting over her Child- H4v 80
Children; for by this her Confession they
must become miserable Vagabonds on the
Face of the Earth, having no right to the
Estate of their Father’s Family, which is
considerable in France, as is that of my
Family (said she) here in Portugal: But I
know, the Law in both Countries looks on
them as Bastards, I being incapable of contracting
Marriage, after a solemn Religious
Vow. O wretch that I was, who with so
much Importunity obtain’d of my Parents
Leave to become a Religious; I, who
lived Years in the same state, with satisfaction
to my self, and the approbation of
the whole Community. How was it posible,
that for the Love of this one Man,
a Stranger, of a different Country, a different
Religion, different Language! How
was it possible, I say, to break all Laws
Divine and Human, and to become so
great a Monster as to hazard the burning so
stately an Edifice, and in so doing, murder
so many excellent pious Persons! O miserable
Wretch that I am, and so she fell
into one of her Convulsions, of which she
dyed. At the Conclusion of this Story,
said the Gentlewoman, there was none
in the Coach that did not shed Tears;
some compassionating one part of the Story,
some blaming another, every one
pitying the Children, whose Cause was H5r 81
was then depending in the Parliament of
Paris (as the Lawyer in the Coach said)
in which he was engaged; but feared he
should be able to do no good on the
Childrens behalf; for he was almost sure
they would lose their Process; and withal
lose that Charity they might hope for
amongst their Friends, by humble Supplication;
to which he said, he would
advise ’em, that they might not fall under
that unlucky Proverb, “All covet, all lose.”

This sorrowful Story affected the Company
with Compassion almost to Tears;
which, to divert, my Lady Allgood began
to call for Cards; But Evening approaching,
they were unwilling to stay, yet
asked the Lady who had told the last melancholy
Story, if she had not one that
was less grievous, to entertain them a few
Moments, till Night should call for their
Departure. To which she replyed, that in
the Coach between Dover and Home, there
was an ancient Gentlewoman told ’em a
kind of an odd Transaction, which hapned
in the Neighbourhood where she liv’d heretofore;
which is as follows.

The H5v 82

The History of
The Lady Gypsie.

In my younger days, said she, I liv’d in
the West of England; for there I was
born; in which Parts there happen’d this
odd Project of a young Lady, the only
Child of her Parents, who were Owners of
a considerable Estate. As she grew in Stature,
she improv’d in Beauty, which caus’d
her Father to keep a strict hand over her;
nevertheless she was not so ignorant of the
World, but that she desir’d to know more:
She saw and convers’d with many young
Ladies of her Neighbourhood, who talked
of the bright Diversions of the Town;
this Play, that Ball, this Treat, that Musick
meeting, this Walk, that Asiemblée, the
Diversions of the Park, Plays, Exchange,
Spring-garden, &c. These Discourses, set
her on fire, to see such much talked of
Places; and that she might thereby be able
to entertain Company suitable to her
Sex and Quality: Whereas she was now but H6r 83
but a silent Auditor to others, whose Capacities,
perhaps, were less susceptible than
hers; only having been in those Places,
and amongst such Company as had filled,
nay, even overflowed them with Vanity,
which discharged its Superplus amongst the
young Country-Ladies, whose lot had lain
at home.

This Constraint and Home-breeding began
to be very tiresome to the young Lady;
but no Persuasions could prevail with her
Parents to relieve this her Country-restraint,
telling her, she must not think of
going to London till she was married. How
far she wish’d to be married for the sake of
going to London, or for the sake of Marriage
its self, is unknown; but perhaps
neither: For she was no sooner arived to
marriageable Years, but she was sought after
by many; her young beautiful Person,
with her Father’s large Inheritance
annexed to it, rendering her extreamly desirable.
Amongst these, her Father pitched
upon one whose Riches and Prudence recommended
him to his approbation; but
by no means to our young Lady’s liking.
He was perfectly Country bred like her
self; He knew nothing of Publick Affairs,
but what he learnt of the News papers:
His chief Entertainment was of Dogs and Horses; H6v 84
Horses; whether Roan or Ball performed
their Heats best in order to win the
Plate at the next Horse race. Beside, he
was a Widower, though not old; nor had
his Lady left him any Child. Nevertheless,
she thought her Youth and Beauty deserved
an Husband wholly new, and not
a Man at second hand. In short, one
reason or another presented themselves to
her Fancy, that she grew obstinate to her
Parents Proposal; they on the other hand,
pressed as positively. This her Refusal
made them fancy she had some other Object
of her Affection; which Fancy so
prevail’d with them, that they threatned
to confine her to her Chamber, thereby
to discover or prevent any such Intrigue.
This was a grievous Surprize, and Fright;
but instead of bending her thereby, Despair,
or at least, Fear, not only made her grow
Stubborn, and absolutely refused marrying
this her home bred Lover, but also
dread the positive Temper of her
Parents.

As she was one day walking in the
outward Court, ruminating on divers impending
Occurrences, she saw some Gypsies
enter the Gates, who presently approaching,
addressed her with their gibble-gabble
Cant after their accustomed man- I1r 85
manner; but she took one of them aside,
as if to hear her Fortune; and ask’d her,
if they would receive a distressed Person into
their Clan; to which they readily accorded.
She then asked them which way
they were strolling? They said, towards
London, to gather up some Rents for some
Nurse-Children they had taken. This their
going towards London pleased our young Lady
extreamly, it being the Place she longed
to see; so she promised to come to them
that Night, where they lodged.

So said, so done; and (like an unthinking
Wretch as she was) left her Father’s
House that Night, and so went to this Band
of Strollers, carrying with her only what
her Pockets would contain, as, Money,
Rings, a Watch, &c. She travell’d with them
several Days, her Person being disguised
both in Habit and Complexion, (for that
they took care to do the moment she came
to them.) After a few Days Travel, she
saw and felt her Folly, undergoing the Fatigue
of Wind and Wet, Heat and Cold,
bad Food, bad Lodging, and all things disagreeable
to her Constitution and Education:
She knew not what to do with her self;
she durst not return to her Parents, nor inform
any body of her Condition; her Money,
and all that was valuable, they had
gotten from her: So, what to do, she knew I not. I1v 86
not. She had no prospect but of Misery
and Disgrace: She pass’d her Nights in silent
Tears, and her Days in Sighs and secret
Lamentations: The wicked way in
which these vile Wretches liv’d, cheating,
stealing, lying, and all sorts of Roguery,
was abominable to her vertuous Mind. Amongst
these, there was one who seemed
of a better mien than the rest, and was
ready upon all occasions to befriend her in
any thing within his power. He was something
in Years, and not so well able to undergo
the Fatigue as the others; nor could
he ever compass the Art of cheating, canting
and stealing, as the rest did: He was
weary of these his wicked Companions;
but knew not how to live without them:
So one Day, he and she being tired with
marching, and coming near a Village, set
themselves down on a Bank by the Highway,
whilst the Gang strolled about the
Hedges and Out-places, to try what they
could pilfer.

Sitting here, the old Man began to
tell her how he came to be linked into
this Band of Vagabonds; of which, he said
he was very weary, but knew not how to
extricate himself, they having gotten from
him all the Money his evil Life had before
procured; and he being now advanced in
Years, was not able otherwise to get a Live- I2r 87
Livelihood, but as they provided for him
according to their Contract when they received
his Money; to which Contract they
were very just, added he, and in some
degree kind, being considerate of my Years,
and other Occurrences, as you will understand
by my Story, which I will faithfully
relate to you.

I2 The I2v 88

The Story of
T A N G E R I N E,
The Gentleman Gypsie.

I took my Name, said he, from that
renowned Garrison of Tangier; where
I was a Soldier. When the good and gracious
King Charles was driven to a necessity
of demolishing that Fort, and dismantling
the Garrison, which was much against
his Inclination, it being a greater Loss to
England than that of Dunkirk; though not
so much taken notice of, as lying so much
farther off. The parting with either was
very grievous to the King: But the
great Machine of State at that time between
Court and Country partly moved
in such manner, that his Majesty had not
Money to support the said Garrisons, so
that bon-gre, mal-gre he was forced to
part with them. But to return to what appertains
to my self, State-affairs being neither
your, nor my province at this time.

I I3r 89

I was born a Gentleman, and educated
accordingly, but the Havock Cromwell’s Party
had made in my Father’s Substance,
forced me (as well as many other younger
Brothers) to seek my Fortune; and so I
went with a Friend of my Father’s, (an
Officer of Note) to Tangier, where, I doubt
not, but he would have endeavour’d for my
Preferment, in time.

But now, give me leave to go back a
little; Before my going to Tangier, the
Beauty of a young Lady had fir’d my
Heart to that degree, that I knew not
how to go, or stay. I shall not repeat to
you the manner of our Courtship, the many
Hopes, Tears, Joys and Fears, which
agitated our Interiours. In short, the Lady
was willing to promise me Marriage, and
to stay for me till my Return, or till I
should be in a condition to send for her;
but that was not sufficient; nothing would
serve my turn, but to espouse her e’er
my Departure; and this with the utmost
Sincerity. I had great Difficulty to gain
her Consent to this; and many Arguments
passed backward and forward on both sides;
but at last her Affections were so prevalent,
as to make her submit to my Importunites,
and so married we were, very I3 privately, I3v 90
privately, about a Week before my Departure.
I will not repeat to you what tenderness
pass’d between us that Week; it
breaks my aged Heart to think of it; nor
is my faltring Tongue able to express the
Sorrows of this our Separation.

I got well to Tangier, lived happy with
my Friend, and made my self many more
in the Garrison, &c. but it was not long e’er
we were all sent for home, the Garrison
being to be destroy’d as I before said. When
I got to England, the first News I heard,
was, that my Father was dead, and my
elder Brother married to this my Wife. I
cannot express how greatly I was afflicted
and amazed, even to Distraction; I knew
not which way to go, nor to address my
self; Father I had none, Heaven and the
Course of Nature had depriv’d me of that
Happiness; my Father’s House a Den of
Incest; my Brother my Rival; my Wife
an incestuous Prostitute. To go near, or
reproach them, was to make them miserable,
and my self not happy.

In the mean time, I wanted Bread: For
the King, who was not able to maintain us
in Garrison, when we did him and the
Nation Service, was as little able, when
we did him none. In such Afflictions, I joyned I4r 91
joyned my self with some others of these
my distressed Tangier-Companions, and so
went to seek Adventures on the High way.
Sometimes we went in little Parties, sometimes
single. It was my luck one time to
attack a Coach, whilst another or two remain’d
perdue at a distance: But how was
I surpriz’d, when I found in this Coach my
Brother and his Wife, or rather my Wife!
Tho’ I knew them, they knew not me: For
the Weather had much alter’d me in travelling
by Sea and Land, beside the little
Disguise I wore. They readily gave me
me what they had, which was considerable,
and with which I departed, without demanding
Watches, Rings, Necklace, or any
thing else. But Hue and Cry was soon out
after me; which pursued me so close every
way, that I had no hopes of escaping. At
this juncture ’twas I met with this Band of
Strollers, and gave them all my Booty to
receive me into their Gang; which they
soon did, and as soon disguised me from
being known by my most intimate Acquaintance:
And thus I have lived amongst
them ever since, till Old Age has put me
on another Disguise more undiscoverable
than the former.

He had scarce finish’d his Discourse, when
a mourning Coach came driving on with a I4v 92
a slow Pace, and in it an elderly Lady,
with two young Ladies. The latter perceiving
our two Gypsies, called out to
stop the Coach, that they might divert
themselves, by having their Fortune told.
The old Gypsie approaching the Coach,
saw his Wife in her Widow’s Dress: He
told them, that their Fortune was so extraordinary,
that he desir’d a little longer
time to consider of it, before he could inform
them; so they let him know where
they intended to lodge that Night, which
was to be at the same great Town where
our Gang of Strollers were going; then
the Coach passed on, he promising to come
to ’em.

Indeed, said the Old Gypsie, I shall tell
them strange Fortune, when I let the Lady
know, that I am her true and lawful Husband,
and Father to that young Gentleman
that rode by the Coach: For I have
heard, that she was delivered of this her
Son some Weeks too soon for her Credit;
so that I doubt not but I left my Brother an
Heir ready for his Estate, before I went to
Tangier.

Thus, methinks, I see an End of this miserable
Way of living, which always seemed
odious to me; but the Shelter it gave
me from the foremention’d Pursuit made me
undergo it with Patience: For I am not vicious I5r 93
vicious or unworthy in my Nature, having
always had a constant Abhorrence of the
other, as well as this vile Course; but a
fatal Necessity compell’d me to it. I have
often thought it a Defect in our Government,
that there is not some method thought on or
contriv’d for distressed young Gentlemen
and Gentlewomen, to employ, and secure
them from these or other wicked Actions,
to which they are often exposed by
hard fortune, or ill management, or the
Cruelty or Caprice of Parents; the latter
of which I take to be your case (continuing
his speech to the young Lady Gypsie)
But, be assur’d, when I get to my Estate,
which I shall now soon do, my Brother being
dead, (by making my Wife own this
her Son to be my Son;) Be assured, I say,
that I shall then take care of you, in my
own House, and make your Beauty shine
in the Eyes of this my Son (if he be not
otherwise engaged) so as to make you become
my Daughter: For which Kindness
our Young Gypsie was very thankful: But
Providence determined otherwise, as appears
by the Sequel.

By this time our Strollers came to them,
having pillaged the Hedges and Farmers
Yards of what they could conveniently
come at: So one Party of them was to go with I5v 94
with their Booty to the next Town, whilst
the other went into this Village, to cant,
lye, tell fortunes, pick Pockets, &c. and so
they were to meet all at their Rendezvous,
at the Place appointed.

Here they came to a Lady’s House, where
they began (as usual) to tell fortunes among
the Servants, who listned to them as
so many divine Oracles. In the mean time,
the Lady of the House came to chide them
for hearkening to those deceitful Vagabonds.
Now, so it hapned, that this Lady had sore
Eyes; which our Gypsie remark’d; and having
before learnt many fine Receits of her
Mother, took notice to the Lady of the Indisposition
of her Eyes, telling her that she
could cure them. Alas, said the Lady, I
have try’d almost all things, without Effect,
and therefore have little reason to put any
confidence in what you offer. But our
Young Gypsie press’d her with such agreeable
Arguments, couch’d in modest respectful
Terms, that the Lady was persuaded to
make use of this poor Stroller’s Receit.
Now, the Preparation being to take some
days time, the Lady received the Girl into
her House, till the Medicine could be made.
This was a great comfort to our Gypsie,
hoping, perhaps, to have an Opportunity of
ingratiating her self with the Lady.

Things I6r 95

Things succeeded well; the Lady’s Eyes
were cured, and then her Ladyship asked
the Maid, why such a young Girl as
she, did nor rather betake her self to Service,
than lead such a vagrant scandalous
Life, and offered her to remain amongst the
Servants, till some Place might fall for her;
in the mean time she was appointed to assist
in the Kitchen.

Here she behaved her self with great
Discretion, and was so ready at all Sauces
and savory Meats, all manner of Pickling
and Pastry, with whatsoever belong’d
to a compleat Cook, that she amaz’d
all who beheld the manner of her proceeding.

She had not been there many Weeks, e’er
the Lady’s House-keeper was married; after
which the Lady prefer’d our Gypsie to her
Place. Here she performed all to admiration,
whether Sweetmeats, Distillations, Infusions,
or whatever else belong’d to a Person in
that Station: she was a Stranger to nothing,
but ill-manners; all Curiosities of
the House-keeper’s Closet was familiar to
her, that her Lady and every body were amaz’d
not knowing what to conjecture.

By I6v 96

By this time the false Complexion the
Gypsies had put on her was worn off; and
in this genteel Post she began to get Cloaths
suitable to her station; that now our Gypsie
appear’d beautiful in her Person, as
well as knowing in her Business, and prudent
in her Actions. Now, as this Brightness
of Person and Parts was visible to
all, so in a peculiar manner it struck the
eyes, of the young Gentleman her Lady’s
Son, who was lately come from Travel, he
had seen the World, with its various sorts
of Beauties; but none had touch’d him like
our Gypsie’s. However, he thought of no
other Favours, but what might be, purchased
at the price of a Guinea, or
so.

But, alas, when he came to make attacks,
he quickly found his mistake; For
our Gypsie, was so affronted, that she told
her Lady, that she must take her leave of
her Ladyship, and desired to be dismissed.
The Lady was surprized, and would not permit
her to depart, till she asked her the
reason of this her sudden Resolution; Much
she press’d, and loath the Girl was to discover:
But in the end, she told the real
Truth. The Lady rebuked her Son,
for having such an unworthy thought towardswards K1r 97
the poor young Creature; and one
that she loved and esteemed. The Gentleman
promised that he would no more
attack the Gypsie’s Vertue; nevertheless, a
while after, the Gypsie press’d for her
Departure, which the young Gentleman
oppos’d.

At last our Fair One told her Lady, that
she could not stay in the House with
the young Gentleman; so once more beg’d
her Ladyship to dismiss her. The Lady importun’d
her to let her know the reason,
and whether her Son was troublesome to
her or not: She said, no; but her own
Weakness was so. Then casting her self
at her Lady’s feet; beg’d pardon for having
dar’d to cast her Eyes, on her Ladyship’s
Son, a Person so much above her:
But alas; continued she, I am but a poor
helpless Maid, He a glorious Youth, whose
Birth, Person, and Education, all combine
to storm my Heart, guarded with nothing
but Vertue and Innocence; wherefore,
Madam, I beseech you to consent to my
Departure, whilst I am innocent. The good
Lady was greatly touch’d, and found a
necessity to part with her; but withal
resolv’d to provide for her, putting her
into some way suitable to her Merits. This
she revealed to her Son, which he absolutelyK lutely K1v 98
oppos’d, telling his Mother, that he
was so far from parting with his Gypsie,
that he was resolv’d to unite himself to her
in the holy Bonds of Matrimony. The
Lady was struck with Horrour and Amazement
at this her Son’s Declaration,
much reproaching him for the Meanness
of his Thoughts, in divers sorts of Expressions
suitable to the occasion. He, on the
other side, defended himself with what Arguments
he could, without breaking the
bonds of Duty and Respect.

He alledged the Gypsie’s Deserts both
in Mind and Person, his own Affections,
which he found impossible to conquer, or
bring into any bounds of Reason; the
Gypsie’s vertuous and generous Deportment,
in desiring to be dismissed, rather
than blemish her Lady’s Family with such
an unworthy Alliance; With many other
Arguments which he produced in favour
of his beloved Gypsie; none of which his
Mother could gainsay or disallow: But
in fine, she was far unfit for his Quality
or Fortune. Beside, said the Lady, your Father
enjoyn’d me at his Death to promote
a Marriage between you and Mr. Truman’s
Daughter, when you should return from
your Travels. And now I have sent my
Steward to make Proposals on that Subject,ject, K2r 99
how can I absolve my self of my Promise
made to your dear Father deceas’d?
I wonder not at your loving the Gypsie; for
’tis certain, I love and esteem her in a
great degree; nevertheless Reason must be
my Guide, and ought to be yours: And
though it be extreamly against my Inclination
to part with her, yet now your
Folly compels me, Duty to my honourable
dead Husband’s Memory commands me,
Respect to your Family obliges me, and
maternal Affection to you, finishes the Chain
of all the indispensible Reasons. Then
calling for the Gypsie, told her, she had
at last resolv’d to comply with her Desires,
of letting her go; therefore commanded
her to dispose her self for her departure next
Morning.

Hereupon our Gypsie cast her self at
the Lady’s Feet, assuring her Ladyship that
she had no ways contributed to any of
this Disorder, which had happened in her
Family; Your Son, Madam, is here to
testifie, that I never encourag’d his Passion,
nor concealed any thing from you Ladyship;
but behav’d my self openly and aboveboard
in all things, except letting your Son
know my Inclinations; but always refus’d
his Proposals, though never so honourable,
being without and against your Ladyship’s
Consent.

K2 The K2v 100

The young Gentleman was about to
reply, by way of witness to her Assertion,
when behold the Steward (which the Lady
had sent to her Friend Mr. Truman) approached,
and with him, Mr. Truman’s Steward,
bringing a Letter containing the following
words:

“‘Madam,
Heaven has justly punish’d me in the Loss
of my Daughter, for the breach of that Promise,
I made to my worthy Friend your Husband
in behalf of your Son: When Riches tempted me I
had no power to refuse; for a certain rich neighbouring
Gentleman gain’d so far upon me, that I lay’d
my Commands upon her to dispose her Person and
Affections for him; which she receiv’d with such
Displeasure, that I have never seen her since, nor
ever hope to see her more; That I am now, Madam,
as afflicted as guilty; one, implores your Pity, the
other, your Pardon, which I hope for from the abundance
of that Goodness which made you at first comply
with this propos’d Alliance with your unworthy
Friend and most obedient Servant,

J. Truman.’”
Whilst K3r 101

Whilst the Lady was perusing this Letter,
Trumans Steward cast his Eyes on the
Gypsie, and knew her to be his Master’s
Daughter, and with a suitable Obeisance, saluted
her by her Name, withal reproaching
her for the many and great Afflictions
she had caused her Father by this her long
Absence.

This Discovery was the most pleasing and
agreeable Surprize that could happen to a
Family. The Lady and her Son were delighted
beyond expression; our young Lady
Gypsie was lost in a pleasing Confusion;
a Mixture of Shame and Satisfaction appear’d
in her; one for having committed
such a ridiculous piece of Extravagance in
leaving her Father’s House; the other, for
being discover’d to her Lover, and her
good, after such a long Concealment. The
elder Lady put a period to all, by orderring
her Equipage to be made ready to
carry them all to her Friend Mr. Truman’s;
where they celebrated the Marriage, to
the great Satisfaction of all Parties.

Thus was this young Lady deliver’d out
of that Ocean of Disgrace, into which
her Folly and Rashness had cast her;
and for an Augmentation of Happiness, K3 Mr. K3v 102
Mr. Tangerine and his Family came to make
them a Visit, he being reconciled to his
Wife, and lived with her as his Brother’s
Widow; it being convenient on all accounts
to keep the rest secret. To these
two Families one may very well apply the
Proverb, “Give Folks Luck, and throw ’em into the Sea.”

The Company were very much diverted
at this Story, tho’ they blamed the Young
Lady for her strange unparallel’d Enterprize,
saying, that surely she had been
reading some ridiculous Romance, or Novel,
that inspired her with such a vile Undertaking,
from whence she could rationally
expect nothing but Misery and Disgrace.
But Heaven was gracious and merciful, in
preserving her from sinking into the most
odious Infamy.

Thus having pass’d the short Winter’s Afternoon,
in Tea and Chat, the approaching
Evening called them to their respective
Habitations.

Galesia was no sooner got to her Lodging,
but a Gentleman, an Acquaintance she
had at St. Germain’s, came to make her a Visit; K4r 103
Visit; and being seated, she began to enquire
what good fortune had attended him
since she left him there, and since his Arrival
in England. To which he answer’d, I
have been too strict an Adherent to Honour
and Honesty, to hope for good fortune on
this side Heaven. However, since you enquire,
I will tell you a Romantick Adventure
which fell in my way a few Days
ago.

The K4v 104

The History of
Dorinda.

You know, Madam, that our narrow
Circumstances at St. Germain’s taught
us a regular Way of living; that our Evening
Bottle did not prevent our Morning
Breakfast, nor Cynthia encroach upon Phœbus;
but an early Couché caus’d an early
Levé; that we had full time enough in the
Morning to pay our Duty to God in his
Church, and the King in his Chamber.
After this, a Walk on the Terras got us a
Friend and a Stomach, to repair to the
Coffee-house, and over a Dish of Tea
hear or make News. My Person and my
Pocket being accustomed to this way of living,
I lik’d it so well, that I believe, I shall
never desire to change, tho’ I am now in a
Country where another method is practised.

Thus, being got up early one Morning,
I took a Walk in the Park near Rosamond sRosamond’s
Pond; after which, I sat down a while, rumi- K5r 105
ruminating on divers Occurrences in Europe,
which will fill the History of future
times with amazing Truths; and casting
my Eyes towards the Pond, I saw a fineshap’d
Gentlewoman walking close by the
Pond’s side, very much dagled with the
frosty Dew of the Morning. She seemed
very melancholy, sometimes sighing, sometimes
weeping, now lifting up her Hands
and Eyes to Heaven, then casting them
towards the Pond; at last, all on a sudden,
she leaped into the Water, and had certainly
perished, had not I been there: For
depending upon mine ability in swimming,
I leap’d in, and truly, not without difficulty
and danger, got her out. I then called to
some Soldiers I saw at a distance, and by
their help brought her to a Seat, where she
came to her self; but would not be persuaded
to tell who she was, or where she
lived, or whither she would go: So I got a
Chair, and carried her to my Lodgings;
where, with much ado, I prevailed with my
Landlady to receive her. She put her into
a warm Bed, got a Nurse to rub and chafe,
and a Surgeon to bleed her, and use all
other Applications suitable to her Condition.
When the Hurry was a little over,
I went into her Room to comfort, and to
get out of her the Cause of this desperate
Transaction. She being thoroughly come to K5v 106
to her self, washed and dressed in clean
dry Head-cloaths, I thought I had seen her
some where; and at last called to mind
where; and asked her if her Name was
not Dorinda? yes, yes, said she, it was by
that sham Name you formerly picked me
up at the Play; and tho’ Time and Fatigue
has altered you, yet I remember your
Features perfectly well; It was such Romantick
Whimsies that brought upon me
the Ruin and Distress in which you behold
me; I had read Plays, Novels, and Romances,
till I began to think my self
a Heroine of the first rate; and all Men
that flatter’d, or ogled, me were Heroes; and
that a pretty well-behaved Foot-man or Page
must needs be the Son of some Lord or
great Gentleman.

I affected to seek Adventures of divers
sorts; amongst the rest, I went mask’d and
unaccompanied to the Play-house; where
you pick’d me up carried me to a Tavern
gave me a handsome Treat; and I pleas’d
my self to think how you would be baulk’d,
when you should pretend to any Favours
out of the Road of common Honesty; as
you know you were. After this I met you
again in Convent-Garden Square; then on
Tower-hill; And thus I rambled, hoping
all the while you would court me for Marriage;riage; K6r 107
which indeed, was great Folly in
me to expect, in the midst of such Behaviour;
But when it came out that you was
a married Man, you may remember that I
abandoned all Commerce with you; For
amongst all my Freaks and romantick Frolicks,
I preserved my self from the great Offence;
But that is not enough; one
must remember the common Saying, “Those that will no evil do,Must do nothing tends thereto.”

For such conduct as mine, was as dishonourable
in the Eyes of the World,
as if one was a downright Prostitute; and
not only dishonourable, but ridiculous;
for it is according to the saying of
a Poet, “Dye with the Scandal of a Whore,And never know the Joy.”

Now, though I broke of your Company,
yet I could not on a sudden detatch
my Heart from the thoughts of you; but
the Revolution came on, and your Devoirs calling K6v 108
calling you to follow the King, Time and
Absence help’d me to overcome my Folly;
and I became more sedate, so as not to
ramble alone to Plays, nor to be seen in
Places unfit for a young Gentlewoman; nevertheless,
a Romantick Humour hung long
upon me, that if any worthy Country-Gentleman
made his Addresses to me, I set
him in the rank of Justice Clod-pate, or
Justice Calf in those Comedies, and fancy’d
their spruce young Footman some
Prince or Hero in disguise, like Dorus in
Sir Philip Sidney’s Arcadia. But notwithstanding
my having blotted my Reputation,
and render’d my self ridiculous, by
these foolish Whims; I say, notwithstanding
all this, a neighbouring Gentleman of
an Estate made his Addresses to me; to
which I consented, and Writings were to
be drawn. I told him, that such a Footman
of mine must be provided for, by my
Father’s order at his Death; to which he
readily consented, and said, he should be put
to some honest Trade whereby to get his
Living. But I told him no; for Trades
might fail, and therefore I resolved to have
an hundred Pounds a Year settled on him.
The Gentleman was disgusted at this Proposal
(as very well he might) and for the
future visited me no more. After this, my Favourite
Footman lighting me one Evening up Stairs, L1r 109
Stairs, in a Freak caught him by the Arm,
and said, Jack, I am in love with you;
and in a gigling way, said, I will marry
you, thinking Jack would have been out
of countenance, scratched his Head, grin’d
and looked like an Idiot; But truly, quite
the contrary; He brisked up, and kissed
me, saying, he liked me so well, that I
should not need to ask twice. I was shock’d
at this Boldness, though my self had been
the Cause, and so went into my Dressingroom;
a place that excludes all but my
Maids, and some few Female Friends; but
he had the boldness to follow me thither,
and briskly sat him down by my Toilet.
My Woman hearing me gone into my
Dressing-room, came to me according to
Custom, and seeing Jack sit there, began
to chide him with rough Words, and bad
him get him gone out of the Room,
lest a Fire shovel forc’d him out with Blood
about his Ears. I, foolishly, was exasparated
against her, as supposing (I believe)
that she encroach’d on my Prerogative, in
forbidding whom she thought fit; or what
other Notion my ill Genius inspir’d, I know
not; but so it was, that I espoused Jack’s
Cause, bidding her be patient, and she should
know farther. In short, some Words of
dispute passed; I still took Jack’s part;
at last, she said, if you have made Jack L your L1v 110
your Companion, or your Master, he shall
never be mine; and so forthwith departed.
I must own, this gave me some Uneasiness,
or rather Confusion, and out of which
he endeavour’d to recover me, with many
fair Words, mix’d with Sighs and Tears,
the Rhetorick the Sex has always ready
wherewith to betray us; kneeling and
kissing my Hands, begged me not to
abate of that Goodness, which had inspir’d
him with a Passion, on which his Life
depended; for he having been bred up in
my Father’s Service, and reading many
pretty Books, could speak well enough.
However, I oblig’d him to depart for that
time; and send my Chamber-maid to me.
The poor Girl having been inform’d by
my Woman, what had pass’d, entered in
Tears, and found me in the same Condition.
I bad her look in my Closet, and
bring me some little Cordial, that was
there, and put me to bed; which accordingly
she did; but not to rest: For I
slept not that Night; but tossed and
touz’d, my thoughts being agitated with
the utmost Vexation; not knowing how
to undo what my Folly, or rather Whimsie
had begun: For ’tis certain he was indifferent
to me; but having thus far exposed
my self to him, and my Servants,
and in them to every body, I knew not what L2r 111
what to do; I was like one on horse-back,
plung’d in the midst of a violent deep Torrent,
fearing to go forward, lest it shou’d
be deeper; not daring to turn, lest that
Motion should empower the rapid Stream to
bear him down.

In this state were my Thoughts; I had
no body to consult; shame forbidding me
to tell my Story to any body wiser than
my self: sometimes I pleas’d my thoughts,
that if I married him, I should always be
Mistress, and not be under the Government
and Correction of an imperious and surly
Master; not reflecting that the whole
Sex, of what degree soever, will always
exert the Authority that God gave their
great Grandfather Adam. Then again,
my romantick Brain would make me
imagine, that he was of an Origin; (if
known) above what he appeared: for he
had been a Beggar-boy, taken up at my
Father’s Gate, and was bred up in our
House, as I have told you, nor
would he ever be persuaded to tell his
Name, nor from whence he came.

Then again, I would draw that Curtain
from before the Eyes of my Reason,
and behold him as the poor Beggar-boy
Jack, whose business it had been L2 to L2v 112
to clean the Dog kennels, and at last,
for a reward of his well-doing he was
advanced to put on a Livery. This Reflection
grated my proud Heart: Then it
was I wish’d there had been Protestant
Nunneries, where I might have shelter’d
my Disgrace, under a holy Veil,
or at least, a pretended, if not a real Devotion.

Then again my Thoughts would roll
the other way, and consider Jack made
a Gentleman by me; resolving that if
I married him, to buy him a Commission,
and let him try to make his
Fortune in Flanders. Thus my poor Head
turn’d from Thought to Thought, without
any Sleep in my Eyes, or Repose in my
Heart.

In the Morning I heard a Bustle at
my Chamber-door, which prov’d to be
between Jack and my Maid; for she
coming then to wait on me, according
to custom, he follow’d her, and would go
in with her; which she refus’d; with
that he strugled with her, and at last got
the Key; then pushing her away, came
in and lock’d the Door fast, and shut
her out. I was frighten’d at this; but
he approaching the Bed side, on his Knees
begged Pardon for this Action, making
a thousand Protestations of Duty and Respect;spect; L3r 113
adding the Violence of his Passion,
which my Goddness over night had kindled,
in his Heart; at the same time he
had the cunning to take hold on that Hand
next my Bell, under a pretence of kissing
it, launching out into many flattering Speeches
not worth repeating; but the substance
was, to press me to a Speedy Marriage,
even that Morning. I suppose, he
consider’d me as a kind of Romantick
Humourist, (as I really was) and thought
it best to make sure work, e’er I chang’d
my mind.

Now I being thus shut up with him,
knew that my Honour (as to outward appearance)
was lost, and that I was more
liable to Contempt than in being his
Wife; so I e’en permitted him to go fetch
a Parson; and was married that fatal Morning.
At this the poor Creature (said the
Gentleman) fell into a flood of Tears; but
after a few Moments, drying her Eyes, she
returned to her Story.

We passed this Day and the following
Night in Jollity enough; but the next
Morning my Steward came to Town,
and was soon informed of this my Folly:
When he approach’d my Presence, I was
struck with Shame and Confusion, he beingL3 ing L3v 114
a Gentleman of a graceful Mien, and
much respected in this Country. When
he came in, my Husband, (for I must no
longer call him Jack) kept his Seat, and
without Ceremony call’d him by his Name,
and bad him welcome. The good Gentleman,
though he knew the Case, pretended
Ignorance, and bad Jack get out of his
Presence, to prevent a good Kicking.
Then with Tears in my Eyes, I told him
what was done. At which he seem’d much
troubled for my sake; and withal told me,
that since I had made my Footman my
Master, I must not have him longer for
my Servant; and bidding me provide some
body to receive his Accounts, turn’d short,
and departed.

This Transaction, as well as that of my
Woman before, were both very grievous
to me; and did, as it were, take me
down in my Wedding-shoes; but soon after
appear’d a business more mortifying
for my Chamber-maid was found with
child and lay’d it to my Husband, and
produced a Promise of Marriage.

He opened my Cabinet, and before my
Face took out Handfuls of Gold and Jewels,
and gave her, without counting, bad her
look out a decent House, and therewith furnish L4r 115
furnish the same, make her self easie, for
she should not be abandoned. He kept
the Key of my Cabinet, and Scrutore;
in short of every thing, that I had not
a Pair of Gloves or a Row of Pins but
what he gave me out. Imagine now, how
I began to see and feel my Indiscretion;
but this was nothing to what follows.

He said, he would have me dispose
my self to go into the Country, where he
had a House of his own, and told me his
Name, and the place of his Birth; at
which I was a little pleased, hoping my
Romantick Notion was come true, and that
I should find something a little tolerable
and decent, Suitable to his Person, which
was truly handsome. But, good Heavens!
When we came to the Place, how was I
amazed, to find my self brought to a poor
thatch’d Cottage! To say the truth, he had
taken care to have it made as well as it
would bear, against my coming; and had
put decent Furniture therein, telling me,
he did not intend my Stay should be
long there; only till he could get his
business done amongst some Friends and
Acquaintance he had in that Country;
So away he went, leaving me and my
Maid, and wherewithal to live in that mean
way. But instead of travelling the Countrytry, L4v 116
as he pretended, he went directly to
London, made off my House, and Goods,
Plate, Linnen, and Jewels, &c. in short,
all. He gam’d, drank, whored, kept
the Slut my Chamber-maid Lady-like:
Thus, he soon ran through my personal
Estate I left behind me, though it
was of considerable Value. He came to me
again e’er I was delivered of my first
Child, and did not let me know how
near he had spent all; but brought with
him a handsom Supply, to sustain the
Charges of my approaching Childbed.

Now it was that he propos’d to me the
selling of a Lordship I had lying far distant,
and to buy one nearer London, where
Rents were better paid, and less Charge and
Trouble, in gathering and receiving the
said Rents; and withal propos’d to spare
something over, (that he had in View
being less in Extent than the other) wherewith
to buy him a Place in the Army,
Court, Custom-house, or the like; all
which I approved and so consented to
the selling my Lordship.

But L5r 117

But alas, I had soon Cause to repent,
when I found there was nothing done,
no Lordship purchas’d, no Place nor Post
bought; but the Money squandered away,
I knew not how; but I suppose, in Riot,
Gaming, and Lewdness. However, I wanted
nothing in that little Station in which
he had plac’d me; and I began to be
very well pleas’d, being out of the Hurry
and Reproaches of the great World, and
my Friends in particular. He visited me
sometimes; and always pretended great
Business, Projects and Undertakings. I
became with Child a second time; but
it was about two Years after the
first.

At this Juncture he pretended it was
extreamly advisable to sell my other Lordship,
to which at first I was very averse;
but he alledging how great the Taxes
on Land were, and like to continue, and
that the Banks and Funds made a much
better Return; which he pretended to know
by Experience, as if he had put the Money
of that other Lordship there; with
another plausible Pretence he made, that
in that Village where he had placed me,
there was a good Farm or two to be sold
with a handsom House on them, which he L5v 118
he would buy, and sit up for my Habitation:
All which look’d well; and made
me hope, and flatter my self that things
were better than I imagined: Whereupon,
after many Difficulties and Disputes with
my self, and him, I consented; thinking
that his Pretences, of the Funds, and Banks
might be in some degree true.

Moreover, I thought, that he, as well
as others, lov’d to have things in their
own Name. And thro’ several other such
Fancies, together with his Protestations,
I deluded my self thoroughly to my undoing.

However, he was so far just to his Word
in buying the said Farms, made the House
very handsome both within and without,
and there plac’d me, brought me a very
handsome Chariot from London, and in it a
young Gentlewoman, for my Companion,
and Waiting-woman; all this look’d
kind, and the Child was pleas’d with its Bauble.

But alas, the Scale soon turn’d; and
my waiting-Gentlewoman became Mother
of a brave Boy, which the false Wretch
my Husband endeavour’d to shuffle off, telling
me she was a Kinswoman of his unhappily mar- L6r 119
married, and desired me to be kind to her;
but she soon found the way to be kind
to her self, and cruel to me; and as her
Children grew up, (for she had more) she
grew insolent to me and mine; and the
Tables turn’d: For instead of her being
my Waiting-woman, I was partly hers;
for she ruled and governed my House and
Servants; and I suppose, they had Orders
under-hand to obey her rather than me;
and my Husband when at home, abetted
the same, shewing more respect to her than
me; so that I plainly saw that all this House,
handsome Furniture, and Chariot was all
provided upon her account, not mine;
and she commanded all as if really her
own.

By this time my Son began to grow
up fit for some sort of Education beyond
that of a Country-School, and for which I
press’d his Father to provide: At last he
adher’d to my Importunities, and bought a
little Horse on purpose to carry him to
London with him: But I could never get
him to tell me where, or about what Business
he had placed him: For whenever I
asked, I receivd nothing but a churlish
Answer: And if I complain’d of the Insolence
of his insulting Mistress he had placed
with me, I had no Redress; but all her L6v 120
her Words and Actions approv’d, and mine
disdain’d.

This Usage at last tired me out, together
with an Ardent Desire of seeing my
Son, or endeavouring to find him out. In
all this a good neighbouring Lady assisted
me, and lent me Money to convey me
to London, advising me to go to my
Friends, and humble my self to them, and
thus endeavour to extricate my self out
of these Vexations. This good Lady took
my Daughter into her care, which was my
second Child; and thus to London I came
I address’d my self to my Friends, from
whom I found few Comforts, but many Reproaches.

Thus, having neither Friends nor Money,
nor being able to find out my Son or Husband,
nor knowing how to get my Living
in the midst of these Afflictions, I did that
wicked Action, of throwing my self into
the Pond, from which you have been my
Deliverer, and are a Witness of this last
Act of Despair, as you was of my first Act
of FollyFolly. And, I think, the whole Sequel
of my Husband’s Behaviour, does most exactly
fulfil the Proverb,
“Set a Beggar on Horse-back,
And he’ll ride to the Devil.”

The M1r 121

Dorinda had just finish’d her Story (said
the Gentleman) when my Foot-Boy came
to know whether I would dine at the Tavern,
or have my Dinner brought home;
but hoping she might eat a Bit, I order’d
it to be brought to my Lodging. The
Landlady accommodated Dorinda with all
Necessaries: For she had so well recover’d
her self, that she came into the Dining-
Room with a good Appetite: But whilst
we sate attending the coming of Dinner,
Dorinda fell a sighing, as if troubled with
the Vapours, which I took to be the effect
of her deep reflecting on things past, and
in which I endeavour’d to consolate her,
bidding her forget what was past, and hope
for better to come. But she said, it was not
Reflection that caus’d her Sighs, but the
Sight of my Boy put her in mind of that
Child her Husband had carried away. At
which the Boy fell a-crying, and said,
“Mamma, Mamma, Indeed, you are my Mamma.”
This was a surprizing Discovery;
wherefore we made the Boy tell us all he
could remember since he left his Mother,
which is as follows.

M The M1v 122

The Story of
Young Jack Mechant.

I Was mightily pleas’d (said the Boy) to
go along with my Father, on the little
Horse he had bought for me, especially, being
to go to London, a Place I so much
longed to see, as most Boys do of my Age.
We travell’d till I was very weary, and I
was glad when we got to a Town, which
we did a pretty while before Night. We
came to an Inn, where there happened to
be some Persons pretending to be Pressmasters
raising Men to go to Sea. They
scrap’d acquaintance with me, and I with
them; they told me such fine Stories of
the Sea, and of Foreign Countries, such
strange things, that I wish’d to go along
with them. I pass’d the Evening with
them, they continuing to amuse me with
their Stories, Flatteries and Cajoleries, till
such time as Drowsiness call’d my Father
and me to Bed, where my Day’s Weariness
caused me to sleep very sound, insomuch that I M2r 123
in the Morning I never heard, or felt my
Father when he rose: For he got up pretty
early, and went away, leaving word with
the Host, that I should come along with
those Gentlemen, i.e. the pretended Press-
Gang, and meet him at London, he pretending
he had Business there which required
Haste; so he left me to travel with those
Gentlemen at leisure. I mistrusted nothing,
but kept along with them very well satisfied.

When we came to London, and I did not
see my Father, I began to cry; but they
wheedled me, and told me, he was busie on
Ship-board, so they would carry me to
him, and there I should see the Sea, and
Ships, the most wonderful things in the
World. I then went with them in a Boat,
where there were several Boys and Girls,
and so came amongst many Ships; at last
we got to one, into which we mounted:
They shew’d me the Ropes, and Tackling
of all sorts, amusing me, with telling the
Use of them: At last, we were to go down
to eat some Sweet meats, and drink some
Punch; and very merry we all were.

Here I staid with my Companions, playing,
and fooling with one another, till all
on a sudden, we were lock’d down in this M2 Place. M2v 124
Place. Then our Mirth turned into Sighs and
Tears, being doubly frighted, when we were
told, we were sailing to the Indies. However,
they wheedled us all, according to
our respective Circumstances; in particular,
they told me, I should meet my Father
there, he being gone in another Ship,
which they pretended was thro’ Mistake:
But I had now learn’d to believe nothing
they said; but found we were, what they
call’d kid-knap’d.

Thus, we all sate in Grief, till the
Sea began to turn our Sorrow into Sickness;
and a Storm arising, added Fright to
the rest. The Cries amongst us were grievous;
one crying, he should never again
see his Father, and another, his Mother,
this or that Play-fellow, and so on. But,
amongst the rest, a Girl of about a dozen
or fourteen Years old, with whom I had
made a particular acquaintance, wept grievously,
because she should never see Jackey
Mechant
any more. I wonder’d to hear her
name my Name; so I ask’d her, who Jackey
Mechant
was? She said, he was a very
pretty Boy, that lived next House to her
Father and Mother, and was her Playfellow,
and used to lie with her, till his
Mother began to think her with Child;
then it was that his Father and he together,gether, M3r 125
brought her to this Captain; to
whom they sold her, and Jackey was to
have the mony for himself. He promised
me, continued she, that he would be sure
to come to me on board, and go along with
me to the Indies; but he is not come according
to his word.

While we were in this Discourse, the
Captain came into the Hold, bringing
with him another Passenger, which he
had bought just before he set sail; and
promis’d to keep him in his Cabbin, and
teach him Navigation; but in the storm his
Cries and Fears were troublesome to the
Mariners, so he told that Boy, he being
so Hen-hearted, must e’en go amongst the
other Slaves; the Girl looking up, and
wiping her blubbered Face, soon found our
new Passenger to be Jackey Mechant; we
asked him why he was put to Sea, he
said, that his Father had sold him to that
Captain, for Faults he was forbid to tell
till he got into the Indies; but with much
persuasion, he told us, that it was for
calling his Mother, “Whore”; for, said
he, one of my Play-fellows, call’d me
“Bastard” and “Son of a Whore”, for which we
quarrelled, and I got him down; and in
my Fury hurt ishis Eye so, that he is like
to lose it, and I had like to be hang’d M3 for M3v 126
for it, if taken; but one of them bigger
and older than the rest, told me, that my
Mother was not Squire Mechant’s Wife; but
one that had been his Wife’s Chambermaid;
and much more to this purpose.

Dorinda hearing all this, knew, that this
Boy, her Son spake of, must needs have
been her Husband’s Bastard; she said, he
was alike cruel to one as to the other;
she then bid him go on, and tell how he
got out of the Ship; the Storm was great
(added he) and a cross Wind continued,
which drove us on the Coast of Portugal,
where the Captain cast Anchor for a little
time; there he let us out of the Hold,
to come on the Deck for Air, having been
very Sick during the Storm. I seeing my
self at liberty, and pretty near the Land,
knowing I could swim very well, having
practis’d the same among the Boys in the
Country, I leaped into the Sea, and so
got to Land; here I found some difficulty,
having no Language but English.

At last I met with this English Gentleman
who took me into his Service, and
I attended him faithfully in divers places
of his Travels, till I am arrived at the Feet M4r 127
Feet of you, my dear Mother. She embraced
him most tenderly; and many
Tears were shed on both sides, till dinner
came, which caus’d a Cessation of these
Endearments; the poor Dorinda, not only
din’d heartily, but the good Meal she made,
was attended with great satisfaction, or rather
Transport.

As we sat at Dinner, reflecting on divers
of these Occurrences, we heard a Hawker
cry in the Streets, “The Tryal, Condemnation,
and Execution, of John Mechant at
Tyburn, for having barbarously murdered a
Woman by whom he had a Child; and because she
ask’d him for Money to maintain it, he most
inhumanly stab’d her.”

We listened to the Repetition of the
Cry, and Dorinda plainly found it was
the Name of her Husband, as indeed, it
prov’d to be the same Person.

You may imagine, that great was her
Surprize, Horrour, and Amazement. She
retired to her Chamber; and I went to
find out the bottom, whether it was so;
and what could be made out for her support,
which I hope will be pretty well;
there being something considerable in the
State-funds, besides those Farms in the Country;try; M4v 128
in all which I will be as helpful to
her as I can.

You will do extreamly well said Galecia;
and since your Wife is dead, when you
have brought things to a Period, e’en
take the Widow for your pains. The
whole Story has been a Romantick Chain,
of very odd Contingencies; so make that
the last Link. Very well contriv’d, said
the Gentleman. I will go home and “Take Counsel of my Pillow.”

The Gentleman being gone, Galecia reflected
on his Discourse, as also on those
other Stories she had heard amongst the
Ladies: She began to think the World
was made up with Extravagant Adventures.
Amongst the Old Romances, said she to
her self, we find strange and improbable
Performances, very surprizing Turns and
Rencounters; yet still all tended to vertuous
Ends, and the Abhorrence of Vice;
But here is the Quintessence of Wickedness
design’d and practiced, in a special manner,
in the story of Jack Mechant, who sold
both his lawful and natural Son, and murdered
his Concubine because she did not
starve her Child.

Those M5r 129

Those honourable Romances of old
Arcadia, Cleopatra, Cassandra, &c. discover
a Genius of Vertue and Honour, which
reign’d in the time of those Heroes, and
Heroines, as well as in the Authors that report
them; but the Stories of our Times
are so black, that the Authors, can hardly
escape being smutted, or defil’d in touching
such Pitch.

As she was in these Reflections, she
heard a Noise in the Street; and looking
out, she saw every body gazing up at a
strange Light in the Sky: Good God!
said our Galecia sure the general Conflagation
is begun, when the Almighty will purge
the World from its Dross, by Fire as heretofore
he did from its Filth by Water.

As Galecia was in these Thoughts, her
Friend Miranda came up into her Appartment,
being frighted with that Light. She
said, she durst go no farther; but beg’d
House-room that Night; I can sit in a
Chair by the Fire, said she, and not trouble
you with a Bed-fellow: But Galecia
readily offered her part of her Bed;
telling her, they would take a Walk together
in the Morning over the Park, to visit M5v 130
visit their old Friend Amarantha. They
had some Confabulation together, Miranda
telling Galecia, how ill her Husband us’d
her, how he had left her with Child, and
went away with a Mistress; I will not say
a Whore, said she, because the Creature is
a Gentlewoman; otherwise she deserves no
other Name. What is become of him, I
know not. When he was landed in Flanders,
he writ to me to Inform me he was got safe
over Sea, but was soon to remove from
thence; so bid me not write to him till I
heard from him again: For he said, he was
going home into his own Country, he
having quitted his Post in the Army; whether
he took this Lady with him as a Wife;
or what else was the Mystery, I know
not; but I have never heard from him
since.

My Child dyed in few Weeks after it
was born; which was an Addition to my
Grief; However, it is happy; for the Count,
his Father left me in such narrow Circumstances,
I should have had much difficulty to
have supported my self and him.

The Men of all Qualities, Countries, and
Stations, said Galecia, are alike; there is no
such thing as Vertue and Honour left amongst
’em, at least, in regard of their Wives; M6r 131
Wives; from the Lady to the Porter’s Wife;
I hear, all Womankind complain of the
Unkindness of their Husbands. All which,
said Miranda, proceeds from the Multitude
of lewd Strumpets; who reign amongst
us with Impunity. You are happy Galecia,
continu’d she, that amongst your many Tribulations,
you have not had the Affliction
of an ill Husband to torment you; nor a
good one, said Galecia, to consolate and
protect me; But all these things are in
the hands of Providence; in whose Protection
let us recommend our selves this
dreadful Night; for behold, the Sky seems
more and more inflam’d; that, God only
knows who shall live to see the Morning-
Sun; or, perhaps, his bright Lamp may be
put out.

Thus, our two Friends retired to their
Rest, as if they were to rise to Immortality:
to which we may apply the Proverb,
“A good Conscience, is a continual Feast”

Vertue and Innocence are always safeguards;
and screen’d our two Friends from
fear that dreadful Night, so that they slept
sound, and wak’d in the morning in due time M6v 132
time to take a walk over the Park, to
breakfast with their Friend Amarantha, who
received them with all the marks of sincere
Kindness and Friendship, as far as her
melancholy circumstance would permit; for
she had buried her Husband, since she had
seen them, and tho’ she had been a Widow
some Years, yet the sight of these old
Friends renew’d her Grief, and, spight of
all Endeavours, made her shed a flood of
Tears.

They endeavour’d to consolate each other
with what Arguments they could on
such an occasion. Ah me, said she, I could
not be just to his memory, if I should cease
to lament him as long as I live, his Loss
being irreparable: He was the best of Husbands,
best of Friends, best of Masters, a
true Lover of his King, and the Laws of
his Country, facetious amongst Friends,
grave amongst Strangers, pleasant amongst
the Young, and a Pattern to his Elders. In
fine, his Deportment was instructive, and
agreeable to all; but above all, to me, whom
he most tenderly lov’d, and accordingly,
was in every thing entirely obliging. In
all which, replied Galecia, he did but render
Justice to your Merit. But there are so few
Husbands who do so in these Days, that
one ought to prize that Man very much, who N1r 133
who treats his Wife with common Civility,
and does not place his Prostitute in competition
with, or rather above her, not only
in Affection, but even in external Behaviour;
of which, this our beautiful Friend
Miranda is an Example. To which Miranda
replied, That she was not worthy to be
an Example in Discourse; so beg’d them to
call another Cause: In particular, said she
to Amarantha, tell us, if you can, what is
become of our old Friend and Play-fellow
Bellemien? Alas, said Amarantha, that poor
Girl has been very unfortunate in her Marriage,
as I shall relate to you, when
Breakfast is over.

N The N1v 134

The Story of
Bellemein,
Related by Amarantha.

There was a Widow-Gentlewoman
somewhat decayed in the World, who
had but one only Child, a beautiful Daughter.
This Gentlewoman apply’d her self, by
Industry, to salve those Sores which hard
Fortune had made in her Circumstances,
thereby to enable her to educate this her
Daughter a little suitable to her Birth, without
being dependant on her Relations.
This caused her to let her House to Lodgers,
but chiefly to Men, as being supposed
the least Trouble: She likewise took their
Linen to mend and starch; or any sowingwork,
whereby she could honestly get a
Penny. Amongst these Gentlemen that
lodged at, or frequented her House, there
was one who became extreamly enamour’d
with Favorella (for that is the Name of her
beautiful Daughter;) which, as soon as the Mother N2r 135
Mother perceiv’d, she took all possible care
to prevent any dangerous Correspondence,
and the Daughter was no less circumspect.
All which so inflam’d the young Gentleman,
that sometimes he resolved to marry
her: For though Riches were wanting,
(which in these days is counted the main
Article) yet where Beauty, Vertue, and
Prudence, are united there is reason to
hope for a happy Espousal; those three
Ingredients being of force to draw in that
other, to wit Riches. Nevertheless, though
his Inclinations were strong, and the young
Creature’s Affections correspondent; yet
they fear’d to marry, he having only a
younger Brother’s Fortune to depend upon,
of which he should be depriv’d if he married
without the Consent of his Mother,
which he knew would be in vain to ask,
when a suitable Fortune did not accompany
his Request. Nevertheless, such were
the Charms of the young Favorella, that
maugre all the oppositions of Reason and
Interest, he was forced to comply with
his Passion, in the Espousing her. However,
they were so discreet, as to take
care to keep their Marriage absolutely a
Secret, till time should help them through
the Difficulty. But as these clandestine Marriages
seldom prove happy, so this between
Palemon and Favorella was wholly unfortunate.

N2 Now N2v 136

Now thus it hapned, Palemon’s elder Brother
being married some time, and having
no prospect of Children he began to joyn
his Importunities with those of his Mother
and other Friends, to make Palemon
betake himself to a Wife, whereby to provide
Heirs for the Family; and to further
their Design, pitcht upon our Friend Bellemien,
who, you know, is the only Child of her
Mother, and has a Fortune suitable to his
Family; and indeed, such was her Fortune,
that her Mother would not have accepted
a younger Brother, but that the way to
the paternal Estate lay open, by the Defect
of Heirs on the Elder Brother’s side.
At the same time, Palemon and Favorella, began
to find their Circumstances too narrow
for a decent Subsistance, which began
to call loud on them to change the Measures
of their living. His Friends knowing
he had a sufficient Allowance from his
Family, wonder’d that he could not live
within compass; and thought he surely
kept Company with lewd Women; therefore
they pressed him the more to marry.
The poor Favorella, told him, she was willing
to ease him of the Burden of maintaining
her, and so would go to Service, work to the
Exchange, or any thing to make him easie.

At N3r 137

At this time there was a Clerk just out
of his time, who had a pretty paternal Estate,
which he offered to settle upon her
a Joynture, as not knowing of her prior
Marriage.

Things being on this footing on both
sides, truly, Palemon and Favorella agreed
between themselves, that both of them should
try to enlarge their Circumstances, by the
way which seem’d chalk’d out by Fortune,
and so each of them to marry the respective
Persons thus provided; promising to
continue a mutual Affection for each other,
and if Fortune should ever turn things about,
so as to have it proper for them to come together
again, then to remember their first
conjugal Vows, and live no longer asunder;
in the mean time, endeavour to bear their
Yoke in Patience in these their new Espousals,
which courted their acceptance.

Thus the unhappy Couple dispensed each
with other to an absolute Separation: He
married our Friend Bellemien, and she married
the young Lawyer, who honestly setled
his Estate upon her: and they both lived
in these their new Espousals well
enough: Whether they held any secret N3 cor- N3v 138
correspondence, is unknown, we are bound
to hope the best, and conclude they did
not, (if one may call that the best;) but it
is a moot point, which is best, or rather,
which is worst, every way in such a Station,
being bad, even to a great Degree of
Wickedness. In due time Palemon had a
Child; by this his new Wife, and all things
went on in pretty good Order and Harmony
amongst them; the Relations on both
sides were pleas’d to see an Heir to inherit
the Riches of both Families.

This Tranquillity held till the Death of
our young Lawyer, Favorella’s Husband; for
he lived but few Years with her, and then
Palemon’s Flame began to revive, and burn
with Violence. Then he began to have
Gripes in Conscience, or at least, his Passion
was disguis’d in that dress; Favorella’s Beaty
dazled him, Favorella’s Wrongs stung him;
Favorella was his first Love, his first Wife,
and ought to be the Object of his Affection;
she ought to be righted, his Conscience
quieted; But chiefly, (as one may suppose)
his Inclinations gratified; which was no way
to be done, but by quitting his latter Spouse,
and cleaving to the former. We will suppose,
that his Thoughts met with great
Obstacles on the other side, to think how
he should ruine a vertuous young Gentlewoman,woman, N4r 139
expose the Child he had by her,
arm all her Relations with Revenge, and
disoblige his own Family.

Thus was this unhappy Gentleman become
miserable through his own Folly.
His Days he pass’d in Anxiety, and
his Nights in Despair; his Bed was no
place of Rest, nor his Table of Refreshment;
his House was a Den of Horror,
and abroad a Wilderness of Woe: his
Wife’s Kindness was disagreeable, and her
very Caresses nauceous. He betook himself
to Devotion, and reading good Books; all
which served but to augment his Grief,
by setting his Crimes in a just light, before
the Eyes of his Understanding. He
had no third Person to whom he could
or durst to communicate this his Affliction,
thereby to receive Counsel or Consolation;
but was forced to feed this gnawing
Worm of an ill Conscience secretly, till
it devoured his whole internal Quiet.

Thus, after many Debates with himself,
he at last comply’d with Inclination, and
resolv’d secretly to leave his House, Wife,
and Family, and go live in private Lodgings
with Favorella, whom he thought was
his true and lawful Wife. This he put
in Execution, and writ the followinging N4v 140
Billet to his latter Wife, our friend
Bellemien:

“‘Madam,
I have taken a resolution to live from you;
I desire you, as you favour your own Quiet,
not to inquire after me; I have very good reason
for what I do; be kind to the poor Babe
you have by me, for its sake and your own;
for, I confess there is nothing due to it for
my sake, its wretched Father,
Palemon.’”

Having writ this Letter, he step’d into
the Nursery, where the innocent Babe lay
smiling in its Cradle.

At his approach, it sliggar’d and stretch’d
out his little Hands to catch hold of him,
as if with dumb Shews, it would have
said, “Pappa, will you leave me to the risque of
Fortune? Will you leave me, your only Child,
whom God has given you to support your Name
and Family, by whom your Race must be
continued? Ah, unkind Pappa!”
And then
its little face drew into a form of crying.
He look’d on the innocent Babe with tenderness;
and bowing down to kiss it, the poor N5r 141
poor innocent clasp’d its little Fingers in
his Wig, as loth to part with its Father.
This brought Tears from the Eyes of the unhappy
Palemon. Oh, Wretch that I am, said he
to himself, thus to leave this lovely Innocent,
the Pledge of his Mother’s tender Love!
and thus to part from a faithful vertuous Woman;
to leave her to the Censure of this
World, as if guilty of some heinous Crime;
or at least, as if she was of some ill Temper
or froward HumourHumour, unfit to cohabit withal!
Whereas she is sweet, vertuous, and
mild, as Summer-dew, or the Vernal Sun.
Her Family and Fortune have enrich’d and
honoured thee, brought thee to be esteem’d
and respected, above thy Merit! Palemon,
to what exigence have thy Crimes and Follies
reduced thee!

Thus sighing, thus weeping, thus regarding
the Child with Tenderness, he heard the
Nurse coming up stairs; upon which he hastily
step’d into his Closet, where he made up
the foresaid Billet; and then left his House,
never more to return.

When his Lady arose, and saw his Closet-door
open, she thought to run to him
with open Arms, and wonted kind Caresses;
but instead of her dear Palemon,
she found the said surprizing Letter. At which N5v 142
which her Grief and Wonder was such,
as I cannot describe; therefore leave you
(good Ladies) to guess. Her Mother and
all her Relations, soon became Co-partners
of her Grief and Disgrace. Which
way to turn themselves in it, they knew
not; where to enquire, or what measures
to take, they were wholly ignorant. But
length of time and much Enquiry, brought
them to the Knowledge of his Habitation,
and how he lived with Favorella, as
Man and Wife. But when they came to
the Knowledge hereof, they were at a
loss where to begin, or at which End of this
ill-spun Thread to take hold; some advis’d
’em to the spiritual Court, there to prosecute
him as an Adulterer; others, on
the contrary, saying, that was playing
the Game for them, just as they had dealt
the Cards, and the way to bring on a Divorce;
which was most useful to them of
all things; Others advised differently, no
body knowing how the affair was, touching
his former Marriage with Favorella. Amongst
many Enquiries, and Consultations, Bellemien
chanc’d to be at a Friend’s House, where she
was relating her Griefs, and telling the differing
sorts of Advice given her by several
Friends; some for the Spiritual Court, some
for Common Law, others for bringing the
Case into Parliament.

Amongst N6r 143

Amongst these Gentlewomen, there was
one (an absolute Stranger) who told her
that she believed she could give her better
Counsel than any Lawyer in the three
Inns of Court, if she would go privately
with her into the next Room; which accordingly
she did; and there she told Bellemien
the whole Story of his first Marriage,
the Cause and manner of the Separation,
all that had pass’d in his second Espousals;
the manner of leaving his House, and the
Grief he underwent in parting with his
Child; insomuch that Bellemien was greatly
surpriz’d, and thought this Gentleman
at least, a Scotch-Seer, if not a She-
Conjurer; or else that she had feign’d a
Story.

Now, Madam, said the unknown Person,
that you are inform’d of the true state of
the Case, consider well how to act Suppose
you could get proof of this first Marriage,
which will be difficult, what will it
avail? ’Twill only make the Man you once
lov’d affectionately, appear a great Villain,
your self Mother of an illegitimate Child,
and deprive it too of the Right of Inheritance,
by proving it a Bastard; and his first
Wife of a comfortable Subsistance, which
she enjoys now in right of her second Husband,band, N6v 144
the young Lawyer, she married afterwards:
For if a prior Marriage be proved,
that Joynture reverts to his Family.

Now, Madam, though this Women enjoys
your Husband, she lies under the scandal
of a kept-Mistress, a Prostitute, a Concubine,
a Strumpit, &c. despised by all vertuous
People; whilst you enjoy your Honour,
your Reputation, the Compassion of
all the World, who esteem you for your
Patience, and your Child is Heir to its Family
on both sides. Now, if you please, take
the Counsel of the unhappy Favorella, your
Rival: I say, take this Counsel from me,
who am Palemon’s first and lawful Wife; and
remember, that, with the Proverb, “’Tis better, to sit still, than rise up, and fall.”

At these Words, Bellemien swoon’d in her
Chair, whilst Favorella fled out at a Backdoor,
resolving for the future eternally to
avoid her Presence.

This O1r 145

This Story being ended, Galecia and Miranda
took their Leaves, in hopes to get to
Prayers, in their Way home: But they
came too late, for the People were just
coming out of Church, as they got thither.

Returning back, they found a Mob gathering,
which almost obstructed their Passage;
one crying out, “You Rogue, you detain
my Wife from me; but I will make you produce
her, or Newgate shall hold you.”
Then another
cry’d aloud, “Out upon thee, Villain, I am
thy Wife.”
Our two Friends thought, this
was a feign’d Noise, design’d only to gather
a Crowd, for the conveniency of picking
Pockets; so they hastned by as fast as
they could, each to their respective Lodgings.

By such time as Galecia had rested and dined,
there came a Gentleman to visit her,
bringing with him a young Gentlewoman,
whom he presented to Galecia, telling her,
that he took the Liberty to bring this Stranger
to her, that she might receive a little
Consolation, by discoursing in a Language
she understood; because English was utterly
unknown to her: For though she was the
King of England’s Subject, yet being born O at O1v 146
at Paris, and always educated in a French
Convent, she knew no other Language.
Galecia received her with a civil Decency,
bidding her welcome into England, and wishing
her Happiness, in the Country which
ought to have been the Place of her Nativity,
as it is now (and I hope, said she will
continue to be) the Place of your Abode.

No indeed, reply’d the Gentleman, such
is her Misfortune, as deprives her of that
Happiness, the Particulars of which I shall
leave her to relate, and wait upon you again.
O good Sir, said the young Stranger, do you
inform this Gentlewoman of my unhappy
Adventures; and do it in English, lest I sink
with Confusion to hear my Follies related in
a Language I understand. Hereupon the
Gentleman began the story as follows.

The O2r 147

The History of
Malhurissa,
Related by her Friend.

This Gentlewoman, said he, had the
misfortune to lose her Parents when
very young, who left her to the Care of
her Uncle, a worthy Gentleman; but his
Duty calling him to the Army, she was
educated in a Convent, according to the Custom
of those Countries, where they grow
up under a constant Instruction and Practice
of Vertue and Piety, in which she
made a Proficiency suitable to the Endeavours
of those holy Votaries. Her Uncle
being to go to the Army to make his Campagne,
thought it convenient to remove
her to a Convent of a less rigorous Order,
where she might learn the more polite Parts
of Education; as Dancing, Singing, Musick,
and the like; get acquainted with young
Ladies of Quality, and be permitted to
dress, something more according to the O2 Mode O2v 148
Mode of the World, than thanthan was us’d in
the other.

This Removal he committed to the Care
of one, whom her Mother had brought out
of England with her at the Revolution, and
had always attended this young Creature.
He left with this young Niece her Mother’s
Rings, Watch, Necklace, and divers
Suits of Apparel, with fine Linnen, rich
Laces, and the like; and that she might
want nothing for that Year, he left an
hundred Louis’ D’ors for her Pension and other
necessary Occasions. Having thus disposs’d
this Affair, he together with other
Officers, went away to the Army.

Now it was, that this wicked Wretch
the foresaid Attendant, had the Opportunity
to betray the poor young Creature.
When they were come out of the Convent,
and in the Coach, in order to go to the
other, together with their Trunks, and other
Necessaries, her Attendant ask’d her,
if she had not a Fancy to go to St. Germain’s,
which had been the Court of
their English Sovereign; for, said she,
now we are got in the Coach, we can
go thither, and divert you for a Day or
two, e’er you enter your Enclosure. The
young Lady, who had never seen any thing O3r 149
thing but her Cloyster, was eager to embrace
this Proposal; so to St. Germain’s they
went; and stayed some days, viewing the
Castle, and all the Appartments, where the
King, Queen, and Prince kept their respective
Courts, the Garden, Walks in the
Wood and Park, the Churches of the Fryers,
both in the Town and Forest.

Going to the Parish-Church to Prayers
they met a Gentleman that claim’d acquaintance
with Mrs. Vileman (for that was the
name of our Attendant.) He told her, that
he was going directly to Paris, to enquire
for her, to let her know that her Father
in England was dead, and had left her very
considerable Effects, and shew’d them a
Letter which he pretended to have receiv’d
to this Purpose. Mrs. Vileman seem’d
struck with Affliction, Confusion and Hurry,
in which the Gentleman pretended to
comfort her; particularly in reference to
the good Fortune left her, for which it was
necessary to go to England, as soon as possible.

Then the Question arose, whether she
should go by Callis or Diepe; but the Gentleman
advis’d her, by Diepe; for being
got so far towards Rohan, it was easie and
cheap getting, to Diepe, and so cross over O3 to O3v 150
to Rye; But Mrs Vileman reply’d, she could
not go directly thence; because she must
carry that young Gentlewoman to the Convent
assign’d for her Reception. Ah me,
said the young Lady, it breaks my heart
to think of parting with you; Methinks,
I wish I was to go along with you to England:
For beside the Unwillingness of being
separated from you, I long to see England,
and in particular, London, with all its
Pomp and Riches; they say, it is much beyond
Paris.

Thus this poor young Thing nibbled at
the Bait they had lay’d for her; and they
reply’d in delusive Words very fit to excite
and improve their Curiosity. At last,
the Gentleman said, it would be but a Frolick
suitable to her Youth, to make use of
this Opportunity; and being with the Person
into whose Hands she was committed,
no body would have great reason to
blame the Enterprize; but on the contrary,
applaud her Endeavours to improve her
Knowledge of the World, when she had
so fair an Opportunity. In short, the poor
young Creature fell into the Trap they had
lay’d for her, and consented to go with
them to England: so they made their Coach
carry them to Poisey, where they took Water,
and away they went to Rohan; the Gen- O4r 151
Gentleman making Love to our young Lady
all the way. They stay’d at Rohan some
time, under colour of buying Goods to
freight the Ship; For he pretended to be
a great London-Merchant, Son to a Country-Gentleman
of an Estate, in which Vileman
joyn’d her Attestation; whilst he assur’d
her of his everlasting Love and earnestly
press’d her to be married. The poor
young Girl was soon catch’d in the Ambuscade
of Cupid, this being the first Onset
she ever made in the Field of Love.
She consented to a Marriage, but he put it
off with one Shuffle or another. However,
having gained her Consent to Marry,
the next thing was, to advise her to let
him lay out her Money in Merchandize,
which would be so advantageous to her,
that one hundred Pistoles would be at least
two hundred in England; to which she agreed,
and accordingly parted with her
Money, with satisfaction, to the Man she
thought her Husband, or at least, to be
such very soon; so next Morning they
were to be married.

I need not tell you what Arguments he
used to persuade her to be his Bedfellow
that Night, we will suppose they were
such as is common on those occasions; as,
that their promise to each other was the true O4v 152
true and substantial Marriage; that the
Parson was only as a Witness to that Promise;
that if she refus’d him, he had very
little reason to depend upon her Affection,
or else that she doubted of his, and took
him to be the worst of Miscreants and a
thousand such idle Stories, wherewith innocent
Maids are betray’d to Ruin,
as was this young Gentlewoman.

In short, she consented to lye with him
upon promise of Marriage next Morning.
But, behold, when Morning came, he had
so lay’d the Business, that the Sailors came
with Noise and Hurry, saying that the
Wind serv’d, and they were ready to set
sail, so they arose in great haste to get
to the Ship, and so away they came for
England; she all the while believing her
self his Wife; and that she had a great
Cargo of Merchandize in the Ship. They
got safe to London, and plac’d themselves in
a Lodging among their own Gang of Villains.
Here he pretended to great Business
at the Exchange, Custom-House, and Post-Office,
always in a hurry, and full of Employment.
At last, he told her, that he
wanted Money to discharge the Duties of
his Merchandize at the Custom-House; so begs
her to lend him some of her Rings and
Jewels to raise it for that use: She believingving O5r 153
her self his Wife, parted with every
thing he requir’d; and as soon as the Goods
should be discharg’d, they were to make a
glorious publick Wedding.

On the other hand, Mrs. Vileman was
hurried in looking after the Effects of her
dead Father; so she borrow’d the young
Gentlewoman’s Cloaths, thereby to appear
genteel amongst her Relations, as she
pretended, till she could get her self equip’d
in Mourning; tho’ in reality, she had no
Relations, being only a Bastard of an Officer
in the Army, who never own’d her
by reason of her Mother’s insatiable Lewdness.

Thus was this poor young Creature
strip’d of all she had, by one Sham or
another. Nevertheless, they liv’d very
well, both in Meat, Drink, and Lodging.

When they had got all from her, (then,
according as it was concerted amongst
’em) the Landlady arrested them for Board
and Lodging; only by a Sham-Officer;
and so pretended to carry Vileman and
the Rogue to Prison; whereas it was only
a Shuffle, to get them away, and drop,
her, when they had got all: For she being the O5v 154
the supposed Wife, was not to be taken to
Prison with them.

This poor Creature being thus strip’d of
all, debauch’d, disgrac’d, deluded, and
abandon’d, helpless, friendless, pennyless, in
a Country where she understood not a Word
of the Language; she knew not what to do.
In the midst of this her Distress, she bethought
her self to go to the Chapel of an
Embassador, where she hop’d to find some
body that could speak French: She addressing
her self to the Porter, he immediately
call’d me to her, (said the Gentleman)
and she soon made me understand her
Business; so I recommended her to go into
the Chapel, and there offer her self to God,
at his holy Altar, and then I promis’d to
come to her again; which accordingly I
did, and took her into a little Room, where
she repeated to me all this lamentable Story.
After I had heard her out, I knew she was
the Person on whose account I had receiv’d
a letter from France; which, if you please
to peruse, you are welcome.

The O6r 155 “The Letter. ‘Sir,
I Am so well assured of your Readiness to do
any good Office, that I address my self to you
with the utmost Freedom, begging you, if possible,
to find out a poor lost Sheep, my Niece, and
to send her home to her Friends, particularly to
me: For thus it is, Sir, The only Child of my
dear deceas’d Sister, has been deluded away into
England by a wicked Fellow, who has abandon’d
his Wife here in Paris, a very honest industrious
Woman; but he an idle Villain. My Enquiry
reach’d after them to Rohan, where it is said,
they lived together as Man and Wife; after
which, they went for England. I hope, there is
a Possibility of finding her, because she cannot
speak one Word of English. She is young, and
tolerably handsome. Sir, if you can find her, be
pleased to send her to me: Assure her, that I will
receive, and forgive her, even tho’ she should be
with Child by the Villain; and shall own my self
extreamly oblig’d to you, who am, Sir,
Your Obedient Humble Servant,
Goodman.’”
Having O6v 156

Having thus found her continu dcontinued the
Gentleman) I was about to take her to a
House, where I might give her something
to eat (for she was faint,) when, just at the
Chapel-Door, I met her pretended Husband;
who immediately took hold of her,
calling her “Wife”. Vile Wretch, said I, thou
knowest, she is none of thy Wife; therefore
touch her not. How! (reply’d he) will you
dare to say, she is not my Wife? I have
sought her three or four Days, and now I
find who has debauch’d and detained her
from me, for which I shall make you pay
dearly. (He not dreaming I had any Letter
from her Uncle;) and, I believe, he would
have had the impudence to have enter’d a
Process against me, in hopes to have squeez’d
Money from me, supposing, no doubt,
that I would give something to be quiet,
and not be expos’d in the Face of the
Church, and my Lord Embassador. This
made him very clamorous, audacious and insolent;
insomuch that a Mob gather’d about
us, and there was no passing; he striving
to get her from me, I holding her fast, and
the People were clamorous, according to
their several sentiments, so that I was going
to call a Constable both for her security and
my own.

But P1r 157

But Providence sent us a better Officer of
Justice, than any other in the King’s Dominions:
For at this juncture, his real Wife
appear’d, crying out to him, Vile Wretch,
how dar’st thou call any body Wife, but me.
She had a Constable with her, who seiz’d
him, in order to carry him before a Magistrate;
for which reason the Mob dispers’d;
so that we got out of the Crowd; and after
I had refreshed her and my self at an
Eating House, I conducted her hither, and
now beg you to entertain her in French,
whilst I go seek a safe Lodging for her, till
I can convey her to her Uncle.

The Gentleman being gone, Galecia amus’d
the young Lady as well as she could,
by giving her Consolation, and blaming
the Wickedness of Vileman, her Governante,
excusing her Folly, imputing it to her want
of knowing the World; but chiefly applauding
the extream Goodness of her Uncle,
who verify’d our English Proverb, “A Friend in Need, is a Friend indeed.”

P Moreo- P1v 158

Moreover, Galecia, the better to divert
Malhurissa from the Thoughts of her Misfortunes,
ask’d her, if she had no diverting
Story or Rencounter that had hapned in
her Convent amongst the Novices, or young
Ladies the Pensioners. To which Malhurissa
reply’d, No; saying, nothing remarkable had
appeared there, but extraordinary Vertue
and Piety, the Religious performing their
Devotions in exact Regularity, and the Seculars
as perfect in their Respect and Obedience;
so that all things went on in a constant
Harmony, without the least Discord;
which I am bound to acknowledge, though
with Shame and Confusion of Face, for
having so ill practis’d those excellent Precepts
and Examples.

’Tis true, indeed, the wicked Vileman my
Governante, for her abominable Behaviour,
is extreamly blameable; but that would not
excuse me, Madam, in the Thoughts of
any less charitable Person than your self,
who is pleased to disguise my Crimes in
the Robes of Youth and Ignorance, and
hide them under the Umbrage of unthinking
Innocence: Yet they appear to me
in too true a Light, for my inward Repose;
which brings to my Thoughts a Story P2r 159
Story I heard at Rohan, of a Vile Governante,
who is a kind of Parallel with my
Wicked Vileman; only her Crime exceeds,
if possible, that of Vileman’s: And it is a
dreadful Truth, being recorded in the
Courts of Justice at Rohan; as hereafter
related.

P2 The P2v 160

The Story of
Succubella,
Related by Malhurissa.

There was a rich Merchant at Rohan,
who had but one Child, a Daughter;
whose Mother being dead, the good Father
endeavour’d to find out a fit Person to attend
her in the Quality of a Governess.
This Woman seem’d very prudent, vertuous
and just in all her Actions, and educated the
young Gentlewoman accordingly, that she
appear’d a fine well behav’d Creature, dutiful
to her Father, respectful to her Betters,
obliging to her Equals, civil to her Inferiours,
charitable and compassionate to the
Poor: She was assiduous in her Devotions
to Heaven, and regular in all her Actions;
in particular, she had a great Tendency towards
the Capuchins Order, and their extream
Mortifications took with her; so that
her Father’s House being pretty near their Cloyster, P3r 161
Cloyster, she went thither daily to Prayers,
and the Superiour, of the House was her
Ghostly Father.

Thus had the Governante form’d this young
Gentlewoman towards God and the World;
by which she gain’d the Esteem and Commendations
of every body: But now,
behold, what a Snake lay hid in the
Grass.

The Governante having one night got her
Pupil to Bed, as usual; she did not immediately
fall asleep; but lay quiet, and observed
the Governante, who instead of undressing
her self, in order to come to bed,
seem’d to accommodate her Person, as if she
was going a visiting; which the Girl wondered
at, but said nothing: At length she
saw her take something out of her Cabinet,
and with it smear’d her self; and then
immediately ran up the Chimney, The
Girl was greatly amaz’d hereat, it being
to her an unconceivable Mystery. However,
between Thoughtfulness and Sleep,
she pass’d the Night; and when she wak’d
in the Morning found her Governante in
Bed with her, according to Custom. She
was amaz’d, remembring what she hadhad
seen over Night, and ask’d her, whether
she went, and what made her go up the P3 Chim- P3v 162
Chimney; She shuffled and fumbled at first,
but her young Mistress pressing the thing
home, she said, Hush, Miss; this is a Secret
to Girls; but when you are a Woman
I will let you know.

Miss was forced to be satisfied with
this Answer for a while; but afterwards
began to press her about this Secret;
still she put her off from time to time
with divers Evasions. At last, the Girl
being impatient, told her Governante that
she should not pretend to keep her a Child
always; therefore she would know this
Secret. The Governante, perhaps, thinking
that if she did not gratifie her, she would
tell her Father, or ask some body else:
Wherefore, she told her, if she would
promise to be very secret, she would let
her know all, and she should go with her
to a Place where she would meet with
good Company, Mirth, Feasting, Musick,
and Dancing, &c. So the Girl promis’d
Secrecy, and the next Night agreed to go
together; which accordingly they did;
the Governante and she, anointing themselves,
utter’d some Words, and so both
went up the Chimney; but flying over
the Capuchins Cloyster, the Clock struck
Twelve; and then Miss, according to custom,
made the sign of the Cross in the P4r 163
the Name of the Trinity, and down she
fell in the midst of the Cloyster. The
Religious getting up at that Hour, going
through the Cloyster to their Church to
chaunt Mattins, they found this young Gentlewoman
sprawling in the midst of the
Cloyster, almost dead with the Fall: They
took her up, and put her into a warm
Bed, let her blood, and apply’d all other
Necessaries on such an occasion; so that
she came to her self, though greatly bruised.

In the Morning the Superiour came to
the Merchant’s House, where he was
kindly received by him; but the good
Father told him, that he came that morning
to visit Miss, his young Penitent. The
Merchant knowing nothing of what had
happened, told him merrily, that his Daughter
was so ill an Huswife, that she was
not up yet; so he sent to the Governante
to tell his Daughter, that the Father
Superiour was come to visit her this mornning;
the Governante sent word, that Miss
had not rested well in the Night, so was
asleep this morning, and she was loth to
awake her yet. In the mean time, the
Wicked Succubella, the Governante, was preparing
for her escape: But the Father Superiour
hearing this Answer, ask’d the Mer- P4v 164
Merchant, if he was sure his Daughter
was in his House that Night. Which put
him to a stand; the good Father added,
that he was sure she was not, and desired
the Merchant to go up with him into
his Daughter’s Chamber and assure himself
of the Truth he told him; for said he,
your Daughter is in our Cloyster at this
time: whereupon they both went up into
the young Gentlewoman’s Chamber; where
missing her, they immediately seiz d on
Succubella, the wicked Governante, committed
her into the Hands of Justice, upon
which her Process was made, and she confess’d
the whole Fact, succinctly, just as
as the young Gentlewoman had told the
Capuchins; so she had the Reward of her
Sorcery, at a Stake where she was burnt
alive; and is upon record, a miserable
Example, of the extreamest Wicked ness.

This Story, said Galecia, is very extraordinary,
and seems, to oppose those who
will not allow any possibility of Mortals
having Commerce with Spirits, so as to
give them power to move them at their
pleasure; to make ’em run up a Chimney,
fly into the Air, enabled to do mischief,
and the like; the truth is, I am not
Philosopher enough, to argue the point; I P5r 165
I can only refer my opinion, to an old
Proverb, “Needs must, when the Devil drives.”

’Tis true, indeed, said Malhurissa, when I
was at Rohan, there arose a Dispute amongst
the Company, of the Impossibility of the
Devil’s having power to raise Spirits; and
from one thing to another, the Case of the
Witch of Endor was cited; which caused
great Disputes to arise, which would, I
think, have been almost endless, but that a
Gentlewoman produc’d a few Verses of her
own Composing, which the Company lik’d;
and tho’ I did not understand English, I beg’d
a Copy, in hopes I should learn, being just
coming for England: They are as follows,

The P5v 166

The Inchantment.

In guilty Night, and hid in false Disguise,

Forsaken Saul to Endor comes, and cries,

Woman, arise, call pow’rful Arts together,

And raise the Soul that I shall name, up hither.

Witch.

Whom shall I raise, or call? I’ll make
him hear.

Saul.

Samuel alone, let him to me appear.

Methinks, thou’rt frighted: The Witch trembles. Tell, what dost
thou fear?

Witch.

———Nothing I fear but thee:

For thou art Saul, and hast beguiled me.

Saul.

Peace, and go on; what thou seest let me
know.

Witch.

I see the Gods ascending from below.

Saul.

Who’s that, that comes?——

Witch.

———An old Man mantled o’er.

Saul.

O, that is he, let me his Ghost adore.

Samuel.

Why hast thou rob’d me of my Rest, to see

That which I hate, this wicked World, and Thee?

Saul. P6r 167

Saul.

O, I am much distrest, and vexed sore;

God hath me left, and answers me no more.

Opprest with War, and inward Terrors too,

For Pity sake, tell me what I shall do.

Samuel.

Art thou forlorn of God, and com’st to me?

What can I shew thee then, but Misery?

Thy Kingdom’s gone, into thy Neighbour’s Race;

Thy Host shall fall by Sword before thy Face.

Farewel, and think upon these Words with sorrow:

Thou, and thy Sons shall be with me to Morrow.

They had just finish’d reading the Verses,
when the Gentleman, Malhurissa’s Friend,
came to call her away to the Lodging he
had hired for her. They had no sooner taken
their leave, but Galecia casting her Eye
on the Window, saw there a Book, which
a little Miss of her acquaintance had left;
and found it to be written by the ingenious
Mr. Dyke: In it she read the following Considerations.

Con- P6v 168

Considerations out of Mr. Dyche’s
Book.

What is Man! Originally Dust, ingender’d
in Sin, brought forth in
Sorrow, helpless in his Infancy, giddy in
his Youth, extravagant in his Manhood, and
decrepit in his Age. His first Voice moves
Pity, his last, Sorrow.

He is at his first coming into the World,
the most helpless of all Creatures: For Nature
cloaths the Beasts with Hair, the Birds
with Feathers, the Fish with Scales: But
Man is born naked; his Hands cannot handle,
his Feet cannot walk, his Tongue cannot
speak, his Eyes cannot see, nor his Ears
hear, to any Use. The Beasts come into
the World without Noise, and go to their
Dug without help: Man, as soon as born,
extends his little Voice, and crys for assistance;
afterwards, he is simple in his
Thoughts, vain in his Desires, and Toys
are his Delight. He no sooner puts on his
distinguishing Character Reason, but he burns Q1r 169
burns it with the Wildfire of Passion, and
disguises it with Pride, tears it with Revenge,
sullies it with Avarice, and stains
it with Debauchery.

His next Station, is a State of Misery;
Fears torment him, Hopes distract him,
Cares perplex him, Enemies assault him,
Friends betray, Thieves rob, Wrongs oppress,
Dangers way lay him.

His last Scene deplorable; his Eyes dim,
his Ears deaf, his Hands feeble, Feet lame,
Sinews shrunk, Bones dry, his Days full
of Sorrow, his Nights of Pain, his Life
miserable, his Death terrible.

Again,

Man is a Tennis-Ball of Fortune, a
Shuttle-cock of Folly, a Mark for Malice.
If poor, despis’d; if rich, flatter’d; if
prudent, not trusted; if simple, derided.
He is born crying, lives laughing, dies
groaning.

Ah me, said Galecia to her self, how many
melancholy Truths, this Learned Man
has set down; yet all but common to Q our Q1v 170
our Nature. How many more are there
extraordinary, and particular to each Person,
caus’d by their Passions, Follies, or
Misfortune, such as would render Life insupportable,
were it not for the Hopes of
a Happy Futurity. Then, O gracious Heaven,
let that Hope abide, support, and
increase in me, till, Fruition crown this
my Expectation: For here is no Happiness
to be found; for whether we look
behind or before us, on the right hand
or on the left, or round about us, we find
nothing but Distress, Distractions, Quarrels,
Broils, Debts, Duels, Law-suits, Tricks,
Cheats, Taxes, Tumults, Mobs, Riots, Mutinies,
Rebellions, Battels, &c. where thousands
are slain; nay, we make Slaughter a
Study, and War an Art. Are we not
then more irrational than Brutes, who endeavour
to preserve their own kind, and
protect their own Species? For that poor
dirty Creature a Swine, a Beast which
seems extreamly careless, with its Head
always prone to the Earth; yet if any
of its Kind cry, the whole Herd, run
grunting to it, as if it were to assist the
distressed, or at least, to compassionate
their Fellow-Creature in its Sufferings.
But, if two Boys quarrel, and fight,
the Men will stand by and abett the Quarrel,
till Blood and broken Bones succeed; and Q2r 171
and amongst the Gentry, Quarrels arise of
much worse consequence.

In these Cogitations our Galecia sate, till
Morpheus accosted her, and with his leaden
Rod, stretch’d over her Temples, she leaned
back in her Chair, and sleeping, had the
following Dream.

Galecia’s Dream;

She dream’d that she was walking somewhere,
in a very rough bad Way, full
of great Stones, and sharp Flints, which hurt,
and cut her Feet, and almost threw her
down; in some places Coaches and Carts
overturn’d; in other places, Horse-men
thrown, Limbs broken, Robbers rifling,
Ladies affronted, Maids deluded by false
Lovers, insolvent Debtors drag’d to Jayls
by rude surly Bayliffs, Wives mis-used, Husbands
abused, Whores slanting, honest Women
despised, Girls trappan’d by Bawds,
Boys mis-led by Drunkards, Jilts and
Thieves; In short, she dream’d of nothing
good or happy; which we will suppose, Q2 proceeded Q2v 172
proceeded from her serious reflecting on Mr.
Dyke’s Considerations.

Then she thought her self on the Sea, amongst
Fleets, in danger of being cast away;
and sometimes of being seiz’d by
Pyrates; a Noise of Wars, Towns bombarded,
Cannonaded, taken and retaken;
at which she very often started in her
sleep.

After many of these frightful Visions
were past, she imagin’d she came into a
pleasant Valley, fertile of Corn, Fruits
and Pasturage; pleasant Brooks, Rills and
Springs, such as are rarely to be found;
for they never froze in Winter, nor abated
of their Water in Summer. Woods
replete with singing Birds, Shoals of Pigeons
in the Dove-House, which cooed about
the Yard, in amorous Addresses to their
innocent constant Mates. Sure, said Galecia
to her self, this is the Eden of old, or at
least, the Land of Promise, flowing with
more delicious Streams than those of Milk
and Honey. She was extreamly delighted
with this Valley, thought it almost a terrestrial
Paradice, excelling in fact, whatsoever
the Fancies of Poets or Romances
could represent: Here she thought she
walk’d secure from Wolf, Bear or wild Boar, Q3r 173
Boar, to fright or molest her Walks by
Day; or carking Cares to disturb her
Sleep by Night; not being so divided from
Neighbours, as to render it a Desart;
nor so near, as to have their Houses intercept
either the rising or the setting Sun.

Thus she thought her self very happy: But
it fell out, as she was one day walking beyond
her usual bounds, towards a little rising Hill,
a strange and hideous Giant came out of his
Den, where he liv’d upon Rapin, Malice
and Mischief; he studied the Black Art,
and with the Claws of his Hands, or rather
his Fore-feet he wrote strange Figures and
Cyphers, wherewith he conjur’d up Spirits,
and inchanted People, and so got ’em
into his Den: For he could not run fast enough
to catch any body, his Toes being
rotted, or broken off, which was the reason
he often miss’d of his Prey; and by this
means Galecia escaped his Clutches. At
the sight of him she ran down the Hill
with the utmost speed; and at the bottom
she met with a good Philosopher, who study’d
the Stars, and had a place in Astrea’s
Court: He took her into his Cave, and so
secured her from the Attempt of Omrison,
for that was the Name of the Giant.

Q3 After Q3v 174

After this Fright, she thought, a pretty
young Man took her by the hand, telling
her, he was her good Genius, and would
conduct her to some Diversion after her Surprize;
so he led her up a Hill, which he
told her, was Parnassus; and said he would
introduce her, to see some of the Diversions
of the Annual Coronation of Orinda. Our Celebrated English Poetess, Mrs.
Philips
.

They came somewhat late; so that the
grand Ceremonies were over: But they
were time enough for the Singing and the
Dancing.

Thus, all things being placed in perfect
Order, and Orinda seated on a Throne, as
Queen of Female Writers, with a Golden
Pen in her Hand for a Scepter, a Crown
of Laurel on her Head; Galecia’s Genius
plac’d her in a Corner, where she might see
and hear all that pass’d; when lo, a Band
of Bards came, and cast themselves at Orinda’s
Feet, and there offer’d their Crowns,
Wreaths, and Branches of Laurel, every
one making a Speech in Verse, in praise of
her Wit and Vertue; which she most graciously
accepted, and bid them rise; when
ranging themselves on each side her Throne,
one began to sing as follows.

The Q4r 175

The bard sings.

We allow’d you Beauty, and we did submit

To all the Tyrannies of it.

Cruel Sex, will you depose us too in Wit?

Hereupon there were a Choir of pretty
Creatures in form of Grasshoppers, with
Golden Wings, but as large as new born
Babes: And these answer’d the Bard in
Chorus, “twit, twit, twit, twit, twit,” and this
they repeated with an harmonious Melody,
charming one’s Senses into an absolute
Transport. After this, the Bard proceeded;
and when he came to these Words,

As in Angels, we

Do in thy Verses see,

Both improv’d Sexes eminently meet,

They are than Man more strong, and more than
Woman sweet,

A great Flock of Nightingales (glorious like
Angels) joyn’d with the Grasshoppers,
which again repeated their Chorus, as if
Echoes to the Bard, whensoever his Cadence
suited to their Voices; singing in an
admirable Consort, with strange Turnings,
Flights and Strains, “Sweet, Sweet, Sweet, Sweet,
Sweet,”
&c.

In P4v 176

In this manner, the Bard, the Grasshoppers
and the Nightingales finish’d their
Song. Then another Monsieur Corneille. Bard began his
Song in praise of this Queen: To which
the Choir of Nightingales sung the Chorus:
But his Song not being in English, Galecia
did not rightly understand it, so as here to
repeat the Words; but the Musick was extreamly
fine.

After this, there came in a Band of
Fairies, following their Queen, dressed in
her Royal Robes, with a Crown on her
Head, singing an old Song, as follows.

The Queen of Fairies sings.

Come, follow, follow me,

You Fairy Nymphs, with Glee,

Come, trip it on this Green,

And follow me, your Queen;

Hand in Hand we’ll dance around,

In praise of Queen Orinda, crown’d.

Hi- Q5r 177

Hither, ye chirping Crickets come,

And Beetles, with your drousie Hum;

And if with none of you we meet,

We’ll dance to th’ Echoes of our Feet.

Hereupon they struck up a Dance, whilst
a Multitude of Crickets, and Beetles,
sung the Measures, such as made incomparable
Musick; quite otherwise than what
they make in our Chimneys, or such as
we hear the Beetles hum in a Summer-
Evening.

Whilst they were thus Dancing, the
Fairy Queen spy’d Galecia, as she was
in a Corner: And whether she was angry
to see a Mortal in that Assembly; or
that she was excited by Charity, is unknown;
but she took a Handful of Gold
out of her Pocket, and gave to one of
her Gentlemen-waiters, bidding him carry
it to that Mortal, and command her away
from thence.

Galecia was very attentive to the Musick
and Dancing; when lo, an hasty Knocking
at her Chamber-door awak’d her out of
her pleasant Dream: The Person that
knock’d, was a Gentleman, very well dress’d, who Q5v 178
who ask’d for Galecia, and she answered
him respectfully, that she was the Person:
He presented her with a Purse of Gold,
and, instantly turning short, would not,
by any means, be persuaded, either to stay,
to tell his Name, or who sent him.

Galecia was greatly pleas’d with the Receit
of this unexpected Treasure; and after
having counted it over and over, she lay’d
it by, and went to Bed; But, to shew that
Money does not always make us happy,
she was very uneasie and restless all the
Night, being disturb’d with the Thoughts
how, or in what manner she should dispose
of it to the best Advantage, whether in the
Funds, Lotteries, in Building, Traffick, &c.

Thus she lay tumbling and tossing full of
Inquietude; according to the following
old Story of a Cobler, who sate daily in
his Stall, working hard, and singing merrily,
any thing that came in his head. Now,
it hapned, that a rich Usurer, whose Lodging
was just over this poor Man, wonder’d
very much at his being continually so very
merry, who had nothing to support him,
or to depend upon, but this his daily Labour;
whilst the Usurer underwent perpetual
Thoughtfulness, sleepless Nights, and anxious
Days, how to dispose of this Sum, how to Q6r 179
to recover that; how to enter this Process,
and how to pursue that: His Head and
Hands were incumber’d with Bills, Bonds,
Mortgages, Buildings, Dilapidations, Forfeitures,
and a thousand other the like Vexations.
In the mean time the poor Cobler
was always merry and unconcern’d: He
resolv’d at last to try whether Money would
discompose him; so watch’d an Opportunity
when the Man was out of his Stall, and
privately convey’d there a Bag of Money
amongst the Rubbish: Which, as soon as
the Cobler found, he was seiz’d with a
great Consternation, not knowing how it
should come there. Various Conjectures
and Apprehensions appear’d to his View,
not worth repeating; he was unwilling to
discover, but afraid to conceal it, lest it
should be found upon him, and by some
Mark or other, on the Bag, or some of the
Pieces therein, he might be seiz’d for a
Felon; or, if none of these hapned, then,
what he should do with it, either to secure,
or turn it to Profit. In short, a thousand
things revolv’d in his Thoughts, which disappointed
him of his ordinary mirth; so
that his wonted Chearfulness was turned
into a dull pensive Melancholy, and his
Singing quite ceas’d.

The Q6v 180

The Usurer took notice hereof, and
ask’d him what was the reason he was
not so jovial as heretofore? The poor Man
frankly told him his Case, and the cause
of his Inquietude. What succeeded between
them, matters not; We are to apply
the Story to our Galecia; who, as beforesaid,
had tost about all night, till weariness
brought her into a gentle Sleep, which
held her to her Pillow till the Morning was
pretty far advanced, when she was waked,
by the coming of a Sea-Captain from
the Indies, who was her very good Friend;
and whose safe Arrival was great satisfaction
to her.

After the usual Salutations, and Congratulations
on such an occasion. She ask’d
him what sorts of Goods he had brought
from the Indies that Voyage? He told her,
that the greatest of his Cargo was Female
Vertues
; which he hop’d would sell well
in this Country, where there was so great
a Scarcity. Of this Galecia, considered a
little; and immediately resolv’d to lay out
her Fairie-Treasure in this Merchandize,
and so engaged the Captain, her Friend,
to send her some Parcels of his Cargo.
He perform’d with all convenient speed;
sending her the choicest, and nicest of the
Female Vertues.

She R1r 181

She thought it her Duty and Interest to
send to the Court in the first place: Accordingly,
she put up a large Quantity
of Sincerity, and sent it thither; The Factor
or Agent offer’d it to Sale, with good
Grace and due Recommendation; insomuch
that the Ladies all commended the
Goods; saying they were curiously wrought,
and safely brought over; but ’twas pity
they did not come sooner; for now that
kind of Merchandize, was quite out of
fashion. Nevertheless, she went from Appartment
to Appartment, from Lodging
to Lodging, traced the Galleries over and
over, every where offering her Traffick,
till the Guards, Centinels, and Waiters
almost took her for a Spectre; so she
was forced to return without disposing of
any.

The next Venture Galecia sent out, was
a parcel of Chastity; which she sent into
the Hundreds of Drury, not doubting but
to make a good return from thence:
Here it was greatly lik’d, and highly prais’d,
and gladly they would have bought, but
had not wherewith to purchase so rich an
Imbellishment. The Factor offered to give
them credit, if they had any Friend that
would pass their word for payment; but R that R1v 182
that was not to be found: For their Friends
were lost, and Credit broken to that degree,
that they had not Cloaths to cover
them (even upon occasion of Profit) but
what they either hired or borrowed;

Amongst this Crew, there was one, that
looking over the Parcels of divers of the
Dealers, who had help’d to Stow the Ship,
found thereon the Mark of two or three
of her Acquaintance who had lived with
her in the same Court, viz. Betty Bilk;
Sarah Shuffle, Polly Picklock, &c. Ah, said
she, is it possible that these Girls are grown
such great Dealers in this kind of Ware?
They were my intimate Friends; I narrowly
escaped being carry’d with them to
Newgate; and I wish I had gone, since
they have had such luck by means of their
Transportation: But alas, it is too late to
repent now, not being able to do any
thing; for I have been so far from gaining
by my Profession here, that I have lost
Health, Wealth, Credit, Friends, and am
become a poor abandon’d rotten Skeleton,
which is not only my Fate; but the Fate
of most of those who deal in this way
of Trade.

The R2r 183

The Factor could not forbear asking her
how she came at first to be deluded? Alas,
said she, it is a great difficulty to have so
much Foresight to avoid all the Traps
lay’d in this Town, to ensnare and catch
our Innocence: But my Ruin was by a
young Girl, my Play-fellow, whose Brother
cast a wicked Eye on me; and under
pretence of courting me for a Wife, deluded
me into Wickedness: The Subtilties,
and methods he used, are too tedious to
tell you at this time; but whenever you
are more at leisure, if you will take the
trouble to come, I will give you such a
Catalogue of the Mis-adventures, as would
make the brightest Vertue burn blue and
ready to go out, at such relations.

The Factor finding her time elasp’d, and
that she was not like to sell any of her
Parcel, told her, she would come another
time, hear some of their Adventures; and
bring with her some other sorts of Vertues,
as that of Penance, Piety or the like. So
the poor Factor, was forced to return, with
her Merchanize, but no Mony.

R2 Having R2v 184

Having such bad luck at Court and Places
adjacent, Galecia was resolv’d to try the City;
which being accustomed to Traffick, she
hoped there for better Success: Wherefore
she put up a good Parcel of Humility,
and sent amongst those rich and haughty
Dames: Knowing, this sort of Goods was
scarce amongst them, she doubted not of
a good Market. But alas, it prov’d quite
otherwise: for they would not so much
as look on the Ware, nor permit the Factor
to open her Parcel, telling her, they
had greater store thereof in the City,
than they needed; which appears daily
(said they) by giving your Ladies place every
where, by following their Fashions
at all times; Whereas our Riches give us
a right to be fantastical, and setters-up of
new Modes; But ’tis our Humility that pervails
with us, and makes us their Apes,
at the same time; many of them being
but meanly descended, they often run in
our Debt, for their gaudy Trappings; and
their Husbands borrow of ours, to support
their Equipage, on the credit of their Acres.

To which the Factor reply’d, that the Humility
they boasted of was only Home-made,
whereas, that she offered, was right Indian.
Away, reply’d they, you know, Indian Goods
are prohibited; had you brought some from France R3r 185
France or Spain, from the Battel of Bleinheim,
or from Madrid, when King Philip
fled from thence; nay, if it had been
but English Humility from Preston, it had been
something like: But to come into the City
with your prohibited Ware, is Insolence in
a high degree; Therefore be gone, before
my Lord Mayor’s Officers catch you, and
punish you according to your Deserts.
Hereupon our poor Factor was forced to
hasten away, and glad when she had got
safe through Temple-Bar.

This was but a sorrowful Return to our
Galecia, who had lay’d out her whole
Fairy-Present in these Indian Goods: She
began to despair of making any Advantage:
but her Factors, who had been up
and down the Hundreds of Drury; beg’d
her to try there once more, not with the
Vertue of Chastity, for it was to no purpose;
but they had great hopes that Repentance and
Piety might take. So Galecia sent away
a good Parcel of each of those Vertues.

The Agent, or Factor carry’d them to
the same House, where she had before
promised to come, viz. to one Mrs. Rottenbone’s,
who receiv’d, her kindly and
look’d carefully into her Parcels; fitted
her self with divers Suits, both of Piety R3 and R3v 186
and Repentance; and sent to several of her
Neighbours to come and do the same.

The first who came, was one Mrs. Castoff,
who took of each a pretty Quantity:
After her, came three or four more; and
when they had fitted themselves, Mrs. Rottenbones,
desir’d Mrs. Castoff to tell our
Agent how things happen’d, that she came
to esteem these Vertues, so as to dress her
self therein; which she related briefly, as
follows.

The R4r 187

The story of
Mrs. Castoff.

I Was Daughter of an honest Country-
Gentleman tho’ but of a small Estate, who
had many Children. Now, there was a good
Gentlewoman in our Neighbourhood, whose
Husband died, leaving her no Child: She
took me from my Mother, I suppose, to
provide for me; which was esteemed a
very great Kindness.

This Gentlewoman, some time after,
mov’d from her Country-Residence, and
took me with her to London, where we liv’d
happily together, I being then about fourteen
Years old: I waited on her in the
nature of a Chamber-maid, thereby to initiate
me into a religious and dutiful Behaviour:
For she being a Widow, valued but
little of Dress, except that of her Mind;
her Devotions, Retirements and Instructions
to me and her Servants, being the greatest part R4v 188
part of her Employment; which, I doubt,
was not so agreeable to my giddy Youth as
it ought to have been; young People, too
often having an Opinion of themselves,
as if Instructions were needless, and themselves
capable of being Teachers, instead
of Learners.

How far this was my fault, I know not;
but instead of keeping with her in her
Chamber, I was perpetually making Errands,
and pretences to be in the Shop
where we lodged; and here my young
Face call’d many young Fellows to cheapen
Goods, and many to buy; For our Landlady
kept a Millener’s Shop. These would
often address themselves to me with some
Question or other, as is usual among Youth,
which had no other consequence, than making
me grow pert, and think too well of
my self: But my Ruin proceeded from one
of my own Sex.

There was a certain comely genteel Woman,
who frequented that Shop, and by degrees
made an acquaintance with me, asking
me if I was a Servant to that Gentlewoman,
or related to her? I told her that I was neither;
but let her know how it was. Upon
which, she told me she could help me to a
very good Place, where I should have not on- R5r 189
only very good Wages, but other considerable
Advantages, and be in a Way for Preferment;
but advised me to say nothing to
any one, especially the Gentlewoman I then
liv’d with, till she had spoken with the Lady
for whom she intended me.

This pass’d on a while, she still giving
me Encouragement and Assurance of her
Diligence in this Affair. At last, she bid
me dress my self the next Sunday, as if I
was going to Church, but come to her, and
she would go with me to a Lady, who had
spoken to her to get her a pretty Girl to wait
in the Nursery; but that it was best not to
acquaint any body with it, till she saw how
the Lady lik’d me.

In this Prospect I greatly rejoyc’d; and
accordingly dress’d my self as if going to
Church, and so I went to this Woman’s
House; which prov’d to me the Den of
Deceit, the Devil’s Dungeon, which in
some Degree I deserved for my Hypocrisie
to Heaven, and my Ingratitude to the good
Gentlewoman my Patroness, for thus forming
an Intrigue of any kind without her
Knowledge.

I got to my Deceiver in due time, who
readily went with me to present me to the Lady. R5v 190
Lady. We came to a large magnificent
House, and went up a Noble Stair-Case,
into a stately Dining-Room, where, instead
of a Lady, was a Gentleman, who immediately
stood up; and speaking very friendly,
told my Conducter, he suppos’d, that
this Young Gentlewoman was the Person
she brought to offer to his Wife; and then
addressing himself to me, Come, pretty
Maid, said he, I will direct you to her:
So he took my by the hand, led me into
a Back-Room, and lock’d the Door; in the
mean time my Betrayer departed.

I will not trouble you with the Repetition
of the fine Speeches he made to recover
me from my Surprize, and suppress my
Tears; for he was a Man of Wit, and an
engaging Mien; he promis’d me a thousand
Fineries, gave me an handful of Gold, told
me I should have a fine House of my own,
a Coach and Servants, with all manner of
Imbellishments to grace and adorn my
Beauty; which Beauty (continu’d he) has
chain’d my Heart, ever since the moment
I beheld it in the Milliner’s Shop, where
I was (incog) buying some things, on purpose
to see you; for you were recommended
to me by Mrs. Wheedle, the Woman that
brought you hither.

In R6r 191

In short, my Eyes were not blind to his
Noble Person, nor my Ears deaf to his alluring
Speeches, nor was my Heart made
of a Stick or a Stone; but young and tender,
susceptible of the Impressions of Love:
For I will do his Lordship that Justice, he
used no manner of Violence against my
Youth and Innocence: But —— with
that she wept, which stopt her proceeding
for a while, but she soon recover’d her self.

I was placed (continu’d she) in a sumptuous
Lodging, with Servants, and Fineries
of all sorts about me; my Lord frequently
came, and entertain’d me with his Wit and
Gallantry; he carry’d me abroad from time
to time in his Coach to take the Air, and
treated me at all Places of Diversion and
Entertainment; in the Evenings we went
to Plays, Balls and Opera’s; I perk’d up in
the Face of Quality, and was a Companion
for my Betters: Thus I liv’d in Lewdness
and Profaness.

By this barefac’d Wickedness, my good
Patroness found me out: For she was in
great Affliction in consideration of what became
of me. As soon as she knew, she
sent one to me to enquire into the matter;
which shew’d it self so foul, that she proceededceeded R6v 192
no farther in her Enquiry; only
sent me word she cast me off” for ever; This
Menace I very little valued, thinking my
self much above her Favour.

At last, the News of my lewd Life came
to the Ears of my Father and Mother in
the Country; who, good People, were
sorely griev’d; and sent to me, desiring I
would abandon the way I was in, and resolve
to live vertuously and modestly for the
future, and their House should be open for
my Reception, and their Arms for my Pardon:
But, alas, these Offers were, I thought,
much below my acceptance; I scorn’d an
old-fashion’d Country-Seat, with Bow-windows,
low Roofs, long dark Passages, a
slight Thread-Sattin Gown, Worsted-Stockins,
plain Shoes, and such like Cloathing;
or to have Swine and Poultry for my Companions;
perhaps, on Sunday in the Afternoon
some of the Farmers Wives: So I refus’d this
offer’d Favour and Forgiveness.

Hereupon my good pious Parents sent
me word, they “cast me off” for ever, bidding
me think of them no more.

This, indeed, was some Grief at first;
but the next Visit from my Lord with his
courtly Behaviour soon asswaged it.

Thus S1r 193

Thus I walk’d on in the open Path of
Pleasure, and ascended the highest Pinacle
of Pride; my Vanity being daily soothed
with Praises of my Beauty; and the World
solliciting me for Places and Preferments
by my Lord’s Interest. All which gratified
my Vanity, and made me believe my self
a great Lady; because I was Courted and
Visited by my Superiours, and respected by
my Equals.

Thus had the Devil raised me upon a
high Pinacle, to make my Fall the greater;
For all on a sudden, my Lord sent
one of his Gentlemen, to bid me not
dare to see his Face any more. I was
earnest with the Gentleman to tell me the
reason of this great Change; but, he could
not, or would not; only he inform’d me, that
my Lord was not very well. At the same
time he told the People of the House,
that they must look to me for payment of
the Lodgings.

Thus was I “cast off” by my Keeper; and
for an Addition to my Grief, they
turn’d me out that very Day, and seiz’d
all my Furniture, I not having Money at
that time to discharge the Rent; my Profuseness,S fuse- S1v 194
having always anticipated my Lord’s
Liberality.

In this Condition I went to Mrs. Wheedle,
thinking to borrow a little of her, to
release my things; and to have taken a
Lodging with her, at least, that Night:
But, alas, far from that, she not only refus’d
me all Favour, but loaded me with
Reproaches; and chiefly, for having so
far abus’d my Lord’s Bounty, and like an
impudent Strumpet, I had depriv’d him of
his Health.

Thus was she a perfect Devil, leading
People into Damnation, and then becoming
their Tormentors. I was amazed to
find my self charg’d with being the Cause
of my Lord’s Illness; of which I knew
my self truly innocent; but Words of Justification
were to no more purpose, than to
fight with the North-Wind. Thus was I
“Cast off”, not only by my Lord, but by this
vile Wretch my first Seducer.

In the midst of this great Distress I got
into a private poor Lodging, not knowing
what to do, nor to whom to address.
I was reduced to great Misery, being helpless,
friendless, destitute, and abandon’d;
and, what was worst of all, I began to find S2r 195
find a great Alteration in my Health. I
had only one Ring on my Finger when
I was driven out of my Lodging. This
enhanced my present Necessity.

Sitting in this deplorable Condition, a
Gentlewoman came up Stairs; and entring
my Room, I soon discover’d she was Waiting
Woman to my Lord’s Lady; and
was come from her to assist me in my
Sufferings. She went with me to my former
Lodging; from whence we recovered
my things, sold ’em as well as we could,
therewith paid all my Debts, and had
Money left, for my Assistance. I thank’d,
and on my Knees pray’d for this kind Lady,
who is a Mirrour of Goodness; not
only to forgive, but to seek me out, and
relieve me.

Thus I pass’d on a while; But finding
my Distemper increase, I was forced to
put my self under Cure; which so far
devour’d the little Substance I had, that
by such time as I was thoroughly well, I
was in a manner pennyless: However, I
having recover’d my Health, and not quite
exhausted my youth, (for I was still young)
I knew, I was able to go to Service; but
the difficulty was, I had led so evil a Life,
it was impossible to hope for a RecommendationS2 mendation S2v 196
from any body: This came to
the Ears of my Lord’s good Lady, who
again sent her Woman, to consult with me;
who advised me from my Lady to put my
self under a Manteau-maker; which I approv’d,
and resolv’d to be vertuous and
modest, and she promis’d to be at the Charge.
This greatly rejoyced me; and accordingly
I was placed with a Person of that
Employment.

Here I went on very well, learnt my
Business in perfection, and in due time set up
for my self, and began to have good Encouragement.
But my unhappy Beauty was
again my Ruin.

There came a glorious young Gentleman
of Quality to lodge in the same House
where I liv’d; his unhappy Person and Mien
were extreamly engaging, and his broken
English, (for he was a Foreigner) was with
such a pretty Accent, that his Conversation
was Charming; at least, it was so to
me; he would often condsecendcondescend to come and
sit with me and my Workwomen, under
pretence of improving himself in the English
Language. Thus, Deceit on his side,
and Weakness on mine, composed an Amour,
to destroy my whole Life’s Happiness.

I S3r 197

I will not repeat to you, his Sighs,
Tears, Vows, Presents, Treats, and divers
sorts of Gallantries, and lastly, his Promise
of Marriage, if I should be with Child;
and this on his Knees he swore; in these
very Words, “If you prove with Child, I swear
to marry you:”
But for my sake, may no
young Woman take Mens Words, nor
believe the Oaths till the Parson puts the
Hoop on their Finger, that Circle which
conjures the most notorious Rover into
some decent Limits; if not of Constancy,
at least, of Formality. I proving with Child,
charged him with his Promise, which he
answer’d in his broken English; Yes, Madam,
“Me will marry you” to my Foot-man;
if He be willing. But the Gentlemen in
my Country do not marry vid de Whores;
for dat is no good fashion; but go you gone
Mistress; dere is Money for you; and so
left me, and forthwith his Lodging likewise.

Thus was I “cast off” by this wicked Foreigner.
But this was but one part of my
Misfortune; for that most excelling of her
Sex, my Lord’s Lady, hearing of this my
Misbehaviour, sent and took away those
Cloaths I had of her’s in making, and withal
acquainted me, she “cast me off for ever”, and, S3 by S3v 198
by her Example, all other Ladies and Gentlewomen
did the like. Thus I lost my
Livelyhood; and with the Grief hereof,
I had like to have miscarried; and having
nothing, to do at my Manteau-making
nor Strength, nor Credit to put my self into
any other Business, I spent all I had, both
Money and Cloaths; that when I was out
of my Child-bed, I was like to starve; but
the good Woman of the House, pittying
me, and not knowing the whole of my
Story (for I made her believe my Husband
was an Officer, and gone into Flanders; ) I
say, this good Woman, got me to be a
Wet Nurse in a Lady’s House. Here I
was very happy for a while; but by some
means or other my Lady heard of my
Character, and so “cast me off”, getting another
Nurse in my place.

Now was I reduced to greater Necessity
than ever, having sold, pawn’d, and spent
All, my Credit lost every where; and having
my self and a Child to keep, Time and
Poverty began to prey upon my Beauty;
so that was not much to be depended upon;
I had not Cloaths to grace me, nor
Linen to keep me clean; that now I was
forced to betake my self to the most scandalous
and meanest sort of Lewdness, and
became a Night-walker in Fleet-street. Should I S4r 199
I tell you all the Affronts, and Indignities
I suffer’d here, ’twould make your Ears
glow, being often beat, and made to expose
my self stark-naked, for the brutal Diversion
of those who pick’d up such distressed
Creatures. By this time my
Daughter began to grow up, and was very
beautiful; and likely enough to fall into
the same wicked Way; but that a good
Gentlewoman, a Lawyer’s Wife, taking pity
of her Youth, took her into her House,
giving her a vertuous honest Education;
but upon condition that I should never come
near her, nor she me.

Thus was I “a Cast off” from my own
dear and only Child, which was very grievous
to me; but was forced to bear it
for her good; and the better to secure,
and accomplish this Prohibition, I resolv’d
to remove my self to the Hundreds of Drury;
for I began to be too well known, to be
acceptable any where else.

Thither I came, and there I lived in great
Misery and Contempt; such as I would
not wish to the greatest Enemy that ever
was. However, it has so far opened
the Eyes of my Understanding, as to know
that nothing but a sincere Repentance will
attone for my Transgressions. Hereupon she lookt S4v 200
lookt into the Factor’s Box, and took a large
Parcel of these Vertues, wherewith she adorn’d
her self, and according to the proverb,
“Cast off Vice, when Vice cast off her.”

The rest of the Company ask’d our Factor,
if she had no good Books to put
them also into a State of Repentance;
so she produced a Book call’d the Imitation
of Christ
, bidding them strictly peruse the
Contents of that invaluable Treatise, and
therein they would find “Rest for their Souls”.

The Factor, seeing she was like to dispose
of no more of her Vertues at that time, put
up her Goods, and went home.

Galecia perceiving, she made no better
return of her Merchandize in London, resolved
to try the Country, in hopes the Women
of all Ranks and Stations would be
better Customers. As she was busie in putting
up her things for this Journey, she
heard a Chariot stop at the Door, and
a Gentlewoman come up her Stairs; at
whose Appearance she was ravished with Joy, S5r 201
Joy, it proving to be the good Lady’s
Waiting-Woman; who by her Lady’s
Order, came to see if Galecia had
done her business in Town; and if she
was dispos’d to go into the Country:
For, said she, my Lady very very earnestly
desires your Company, now the Spring
comes on. Therefore, dear Galecia, dispose
your self to go with me.

This Invitation was an inexpressible Joy
to our Galecia; so she hastned to put up every
thing; the Gentlewoman lending her
helping hand; soon finished and took her
away in the Chariot to her Inn that night,
in order to prosecute their Journey early
the next Morning.

Finis.

S5v

Errata

  • Page 42. Line ult. read Richard for
    Robert;
  • p. 77. l. 16. r. or Cogitation;
  • p. 97.
    l. 28. r. by putting;
  • p. 101. l. 19. r. good Lady;
  • p. 131. l. 18. r. quite put out;
  • p. 148. l. I.
    r. than what was;
  • p. 150. l. 16. r. her Curiosity.
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