Boſvil and Galeſia.
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Boſvil and Galesia,
As Related to
Lucasia, in St. Germains Garden.
Printed for E. Curll, at the Dial and Bible
againſt St. Dunſtan’s Church in Fleetſtreet;
and C. Crownfield, at Cambridge. 1713MDCCXIII.x
To the Honourable The Countess of Exeter.
May it pleaſe Your Ladyſhip,
To ſend abroad the Compoſure of leiſure Hours, as at firſt I was very timerous, ſo (had not the ſweet Reflections of Your Ladyſhip’s experienc’d Goodneſs emboldned me to skreen this little Novel under your auſpicious Protection) it had for ever lain Dormant; and which indeed, now it does humbly proſtrate it ſelf before you, can have no other Pretenſions, than to be Half an Hours A- vi A3v Amuſement to Your Ladyſhip; I wiſh I cou’d ſay, any Improvement to thoſe ripening Graces which ſhine ſo conſpicuoſly in my Young Lady, whilſt they pattern Your Ladyſhip’s, and ſo may juſtly be eſteem’d Hereditary from your truly Noble Blood; who, as ſhe is the Darling of Your Ladyſhip’s Heart, and the Delight indeed of all who behold her, ſo that ſhe may never intangle her Noble Perſon in thoſe Levities and Misfortunes the enſuing Treatiſe deſcribes me unhappily to have ſtruggled with, ſhall always be the hearty Wiſh of,
Your Ladyſhip’s Most Obedient, Humble Servant,
To the Author of the following Novel.
Condemn me not, Galesia, Fair unknown,
If I to praiſe Thee, firſt my Error own;
A partial View and Prejudice of Fame
Slighted thy Pages for the Novel’s Name:
Methought I ſcorn’d of Nymphs and Knights to dream
And all the Trifles of a Love-Tale Scheme;
Poor dry Romances of a tortur’d Brain,
Where we ſee none but the Compoſer’s Pain.
Thus I, by former Rules of Judgment led,
But ſoon my Fault recanted as I read.
So by falſe Seers, miſdoubting Men betray’d,
Are often of the real Guide afraid;
But when by Proof convinc’d they lend an Ear,
Their Truths Diviner from their Foils appear.
Who now can bear their ſtiff affected Vein,
Their Loves, their Cupids, and the idle Train
Which Fools are pleas’d with, and which Mad-men feign?When viii A4v
When Here he may with juſter Wonder view
The Charms of Nature, and thoſe painted true.
By what ſtrange Springs our real Paſſions move,
How vain are all the Diſguiſes when we Love;
What Wiles and Stratagems the Men ſecure,
And what the tortur’d Female Hearts endure;
Compell’d to ſtifle what they feign would tell,
While Truth commands, but Honour muſt rebel.
All this, ſo well, ſo naturally dreſt,
At once with Wit and Innocence expreſt;
So true appears, ſo juſt, and yet ſo plain,
We mourn thy Sorrows, and we feel thy Pain.
None here is like thy falſe Diſſembler found,
All Pity Thee but He who gave the Wound.
And yet the perjur’d Swain, Galesia ſpare,
Nor urge on Vengeance with a haſty Pray’r;
Tho’ much he merits it, ſince all agree
Enough he’s Puniſh’d in his loſing Thee.
1713-05-20May 20, 1713.
The History Of the Amours of Boſvil and Galeſia,
As Related to Lucaſia, In St. Germains Garden.
It was in the Heat of Summer, when News is daily coming, and hourly expected, from the Campaigns; which, as it employs the Heads of the Politicians, and Arms of the Heroes, ſo it fills the Hearts of the Fair with a thousand Apprehenſions,B prehenſions, 002 B1v 2 prehenſions, in Consideration of their reſpective Friends and Relations therein concern’d. This induc’d Galeſia to an early Walk in St. Germains Garden; where meeting her Friend Lucaſia, they took a Turn or two by the little Wood, entertaining themselves on the ſeveral Adventures of the former and late War, and what they had to hope or fear from the Succeſs, or Overthrow of either or both Parties; their dearest and nearest Relations being equally engag’d on both Sides. King James’s Affairs having ſo turn’d Things in Europe, that the War between France and the Allies was almoſt like a Civil War: Friend againſt Friend, Brother againſt Brother; Father againſt Son, and ſo on. After divers Diſquiſitions and Turns of Diſcourſe on theſe Occurrences, Lucasia, being willing to quit this melancholy Theme, deſir’d Galeſia to recount to her the Adventures of her early Years, of which she had already heard ſome Part, and therefore believ’d the whole to be a diverting Novel; wherefore ſeating themſelves, Galecia related as follows.
The History of Galesia.
My Father (ſaid Galesia) and all his Family being of the Loyal Party, in the Time of King Charles the Firſt, is a ſufficient Demonſtration of the Non-exiſtence of Riches among them; for ſome were in Battle ſlain, and ſome in Priſon died; ſome were ruin’d in their Eſtates, ſome in their Perſons, ſo that moſt of the Adherents to the Royal Cauſe were unhappy. My Father, with the reſt, loſt a very honourable and profitable Place at Court; after which he retir’d into the Country, leading a very private, or rather obſcure Life, juſt above the Contempt of Poverty, and belowB2 low 004 B2v 4 low that Envy which attends Riches, of which he laid aſide all Hopes, only contenting himſelf to give his Children an Education that might fit them for a more plentiful Condition of Life, if Fortune ſhould ever make them her Favourites.
I was about ten or eleven Years old when my Mother took me from PutneySchool; finding thoſe Places the Academies of Vanity and Expence; no ways inſtructive in the Rudiments of a Country Gentlewoman’s Life, for which, in all Probability, I was deſtin’d; therefore reaſonably judg’d her own Houſe a fitter Claſs to prepare me for that Station.
Here I had not been long e’er there came to our Houſe a young Gentleman of our Neighbourhood, one Mr. Brafort, a School-fellow and particular Companion of my Brother’s. This Gentleman took ſuch a Liking to Miſs, (for I was not yet paſt that Title) that he reſolv’d to have no other Wife, tho’ he was already a Man, and I but a Child; which he not only ſaid but demonſtrated, in refuſing all Propoſals of that kind, always alledging that he would ſtay for Galesia; and accordingly frequented our Houſe, 005 B3r 5 Houſe, diſpens’d with my Follies and Humours, making himſelf my Companion even in my childiſh Recreations.
I cannot but reflect on this Part of Life as the Happieſt Time we are born to know, when Youth and Innocence tune all things, and render them harmonious; our Days paſs in Play and Health, and our Nights in ſound Sleep; our Pillows are not ſtuff’d with Cares, nor our waking Hours incumbred with Paſſions: We reflect not on what is paſt, nor take a Proſpect of what is to come: we toſs our Shittlecock while weary, and then our Tutor’s Beck chearfully go to our Lecture: Thus we paſs our happy Days till Reaſon begins to bud in our Actions; then we no ſooner know that we have a Being, and rejoice that we are the nobleſt Part of the Creation, but Paſſion takes Root in our Hearts, and very often out-grows and ſmothers our Rational Faculties. This I experienc’d; for I was ſcarce arriv’d to thoſe Years in which we begin to diſtinguiſh between Friendſhip and Affection; but I became ſenſible of the latter towards a Kinſman of ours, one Mr. Boſvil, who came to our Houſe, and notwithſtanding I had arm’d my Thoughts with a thouſand 006 B3v 6 thouſand Reſolutions againſt Love, yet the firſt Moment I ſaw this Man I lov’d him; tho’ he had nothing extraordinary in Perſon or Parts, to excite ſuch an Affection; nevertheleſs, the Moment that his Eyes met mine, my Heart was ſenſible of an Emotion it had never felt before.
I was now about the Age of Fifteen, at which time my Mother thought fit to ſend me to London, to remain under the Government of my Aunt, my Lady Martial, a virtuous Matron, under whose prudent Conduct, I might learn a little of the Town Politeneſs; its Civilities without its Vanities; its Diverſiions without its Vices, &c. This Journey was extreamly pleaſing to me, which is uſual to any young Country Creature. London! the Idol of all the World, might naturally create Longings in a young female Heart: It was alſo pleaſing to Mr. Brafort, my reputed Lover: He ſuppoſing this Voyage would ripen my Underſtanding and Knowledge of the World, which was yet very green; wanting Experience and Converſation to ripen, and bring to Maturity thoſe Parts wherewith Nature had endued me. In the mean time declaring to his Relations, 007 B4r 7 Relations, that he intended to marry me at my Return; not doubting (I ſuppoſe) my Parents Conſent when-ever he ſhould ask it; his Eſtate rendering the Demand too advantagious to be refus’d; his Perſon not diſagreeable; therefore concluded he had nothing to fear, having always found a kind Reception at our Houſe; not only as a Neighbour, but my Brother’s Friend and particular Acquaintance.
The Satisfaction I took, was not only that I ſhould enjoy a little Ramble, and Diverſions of the Town, always agreeable to Youth, but knew I ſhould there ſee my Cousin Boſvil, who was then a Student at the Inns of Court. But alaſs how was I non-plus’d when at the firſt Viſit he made me, he let me know he was inform’d that my coming to London was to buy me Cloaths, in order to be married to Mr. Brafort! This he affirm’d with ſuch an Air as left me no Room to ſuppose it Jeſt or Banter, letting me know his Authors, one of which was Mr. Brafort’s Man; inſomuch that I really began to fear that it was ſo at the Bottom, and that ſuch an Affair might have been tranſacted between him and my Parents. However, 008 B4v 8 However, I aſſuring him that I knew nothing of any ſuch Intention, he believ’d me with a great Pleaſure and Satisfaction; and from Time to Time made me underſtand his Looks and Geſtures, that his Viſits proceeded rather from Paſſion than Friendſhip; and that he was drawn to my Aunt’s Houſe by other Cords than thoſe of Conſanguinity to me, or Reſpect to her Ladyſhip; which my vigilant Aunt ſoon perceiv’d, but (as the Proverb is) look’d through her Fingers; and under the Cloak of a Kinſman, gave the Lover juſt as so much Opportunity as ſerved to blow up his Flame, without too far engaging my young and unexperiec’d Heart; ſhe knowing that his Eſtate, beſides his Pretenſions to the Law, render’d him an advantagious Party.
By this diſcreet Proceeding of my Aunt, he had very little Opportunity to teſtify his Affection; ſtill he found ſome Moments to aſſure me of an everlaſting Love, and to ſue for the ſame of me. I, young and unexperienc’d as I was, had nevertheleſs the Cunning to conceal my Paſſion, and pretend not to believe his. The Truth is, I had heard ſo ill a Character of the Town Amours, as being 009 C1r 9 being all Libertiniſm, and more eſpecially the Inns of Court; that I dreaded to launch on ſo dangerous a Sea; thinking each Sigh a Storm to overſet ones Reputation; which too often proves true in Fact, eſpecially if the Amour be ſecret, or without Parents Conſent; that good Pilot which conducts young Lovers to the ſafe Harbour of Matrimony. Without which, we can hope for little but Shipwreck of our Fortunes, and Quiet. This Conſideration made me pretend to take all he ſaid for Banter, or youthful Gallantry. In fine, I put him off with one little Shuffle, or other, which he pretended to hope, was only the Effect of Modeſty, till ſuch time as we ſhou’d come into the Country; and there be authorized by our Parents to make him happy. In the interim he reſolved to demean himſelf ſo as to merit their Conſent. All which pleas’d not only my amorous, but my haughty Inclination; for I diſdain’d to be courted thus in hugger mugger. Thus Crimes, or Folly, mix themſelves with our Vertues, Pride with Honour, Diſſimulation with Modeſty, &c. However as the World now rolls, we are under a kind of Conſtraint to follow its Byaſs.C Now 010 C1v 10
Now as Pride agitated my Thoughts in regard of Boſvil, ſo did Revenge a little in regard of Brafort; for I pleas’d my ſelf to think how he wou’d be balk’d, who, I thought, had been very remiſs in his Devoirs towards ſuch a Goddeſs, as the World’s Flatterers had made of me. Seven or eight Months being paſt in this manner, my Mother ſent for me home into the Country, and my Brother, who was to be my Convoy, carried me by Oxford, to ſhew me the Glory of the Univerſity at the time of the Act, when it ſhines with greateſt Splendor. The Complements and Civilities I receiv’d there from the Towns-men of all Ranks, were ſo many, and ſo much above my Merit, that it would look like a Fiction for me now to repeat ’em. Therefore (with Friar Bacon’s ſpeaking Head) I will only ſay, Time is paſt, and for ever keep Silence on that Subject; for the very naming thoſe bright Encomiums then given to my Youth, wou’d be like dreſſing up a Death’s-Head in Curls, Point, and Ribbons: However, all this Vanity did not ſequeſter my Thoughts one Moment from my beloved Boſvil, but I returned home into the Country, full of Longings for his Arrival.In 011 C2r 11
In the mean time, our Neighbour Mr. Brafort had got ſome little Hint of this Amour; reſolved ſpeedily to accompliſh his intended Marriage with me: but Almighty Providence order’d it ſo, that immediately after my Arrival into the Country, he fell ſick of a continued Fever, which in the ſpace of ten Days carried him into his Grave, inſtead of his Nuptial Bed; to the great Grief of all his Relations. Thus we ſee that Human Projects are meer Vapours, carried about with every Blaſt of croſs Accidents; and the Projectors themſelves puſh’d by the Hand of Death into the Abyſs of Oblivion.
This unlook’d for Death of Brafort, was no way afflicting to me, more than as a Friend, and Neighbour; for all my tender Thoughts were bound up in Boſvil, whoſe Abſence made my Life tedious, and every Minute ſeem’d a Year till his Arrival. But ah my Lucaſia! what are our Hopes when founded on any thing but Heaven? My long’d for Boſvil came, and inſtead of bringing with him the Careſſes of an overjoy’d Lover, or at leaſt the Addreſſes of a fond Admirer, nothing accompanied his Converſation but a certain cold Reſpect C2 ſcarce 012 C2v 12 ſcarce ſurmounting common Civility. Inſtead of ingaging my Parents to intercede on his Behalf with me their Darli ng Child, he, in my Preſence, conſu lted my Father about a certain Neighbouring Gentlewoman, who was prop os’d him in Marriage. This Diſcourſe I heard with ſeeming Tranquility, and prais’d the young Lady, wiſhing ſhe might be ſo ſenſible of his Merit, as to make him ſpeedily happy. Here, my Lucaſia, Truth and Sincerity were ſupplanted by a certain Tincture of Modeſty, and Pride; for no Mouth ſpake more directly againſt the Sentiments of a Heart, than mine did at that time; but this is one of the fineſt ſpun Snares wherewith the Devil intraps us; when he makes us abandon one Vertue, to idolize another: As when the Learned Caſuiſts contend for Faith, to the Breach of Charity; and the Enthuſiaſticks, in their fantaſtick Raptures, neglect the common Duties of Human Life. Thus I, ſilly Maid, ſet up a pretended Indifferency, to which falſe Idol I ſacrificed all my Satisfaction.
Now, tho’ in Boſvil’s Preſence I made a ſhift to keep up this Outſide of a ſeeming Inſenſibility of Love; but interiorlyteriorly 013 C3r 13 teriorly I was tormented with a thouſand Anxieties, which made me ſeek Solitude where I might without Witneſs or Controul, disburthen my overcharg’d Heart of Sighs and Tears. This Solitude I ſought was not hard to be found, our Habitation being ſituate in a remote Country Village; where one has full Opportunity, to ſooth and cajole Melancholy; till it become rampant, and hardly to be reſtrain’d. Sometimes I endeavoured to divert my Chagrine, by contemplating in theſe ſhady Walks the wondrous Works of the Creation. In the Spring methought the Earth was dreſs’d in new Apparel, the ſoft Meadow Graſs was a Robe of green Velvet, embroider’d with Pearls, and Diamonds, compos’d of the Evening Dew, which the Sun’s Morning Rays made bright and ſparkling; all the Borders curiouſly laced, by the chequered Work of Sun and Shade; caus’d by the Trees and Hedges. It was in ſome of theſe ſolitary Walks that my rolling Thoughts turn’d themſelves into theſe Verſes.Me 014 C3v 14
Methinks theſe Shades, ſtrange Thoughts ſuggeſt,
Which beat my Head, and cool my Breaſt;
And mind me of a Laurel Creſt.
Methinks I hear the Muſes sing,
And ſee ’em all dance in a Ring;
And call upon me to take wing.
We will (ſay they) aſſiſt thy Flight,
Till thou reach fair Orinda’s Height,
If thou can’ſt this World’s Follies ſlight.
We’ll bring thee to our bright Abodes,
Amongst the Heroes and the Gods,
If thou and Wealth can be at odds.
Then gentle Maid caſt off thy Chain,
Which links thee to thy faithleſs Swain,
And vows a Virgin to remain.
Write, write thy Vow upon this Tree,
By us it ſhall recorded be;
And thou enjoy Eternity.
Looking behind me, I ſaw a very ſmooth-bark’d Aſh, under which I ſat; and in the midſt of melancholy Whimſies, I writ thoſe Lines on the Body of the Tree, having commonly a little Pen and 015 C4r 15 and Ink in my Pocket. This Fancy joyn’d with what I had lately read in a little Book of my Lord Bacon’s, that a wiſe Man ought to have two Deſigns on foot at a time, or according to the Proverb, two Strings to one’s Bow: So I, finding my ſelf abandon’d by Boſvil, and thinking it impoſſible ever to love again, reſolved to eſpouſe a Book, and ſpend my Days in Study: This Fancy having once taken Root, grew apace, and branch’d it ſelf forth in a thouſand vain Conceits. I imagined my ſelf the Orinda, or Sapho of my Time, and amongſt my little Reading, the Character of the Faithful Shepperdeſs in the Play pleas’d me extreamly; I reſolved to imitate her, not only in perpetual Chaſtity, but in learning the Uſe of Simples for the Good of my Country Neighbours. Thus I thought to become Apollo’s Darling Daughter, and Maid of Honour to the Muſes. In order to this I got my Brother (who was not yet return’d to Oxford)to ſet me in the way to learn my Grammar, which he willingly did, thinking it only a Vapour of Fancy, to be blown away with the firſt Puff of Vanity, or new Mode; or a Freak without Foundation, to be over- 016 C4v 16 overthrown with the firſt Difficulty it ſhou’d meet with in the Syntax; knowing it to be leſs eaſie to make Subſtantive and Adjective agree, than to place a Patch, Curl, or any other additional Graces on a young Face; ſo as to render it, if not more charming, more gallant: He not knowing the Foundation of my Enterprize, laugh’d at my Project, tho’ he humoured me out of Complaiſance: for I had not let him know any thing of this Amour, suppoſing an Affront of this kind might produce ſome fatal Accident; beſide, my Pride wou’d not permit me to let this Contempt of my Youth and Beauty be known; theſe Conſiderations made me keep this a Secret from my Brother, and all the World; tho’ otherwiſe, he was the Confident of all my poor Heart was able to conceive; for he was dear to me, not only as a Brother, but a Friend; the Bands of fraternal Love were ſtrengthned, by thoſe of Choice, and Inclination, and both united by a Reaſon; for never was Man fitter for an Election of this kind, where Prudence might have the caſting Voice, which indeed ought to be in all our Actions. But to return from whence I digreſs’dI 017 D1v 17
I follow’d my Study cloſe, betook my ſelf to a plain kind of Habit: quitted all Point, Lace, Ribbons, and fine Clothes; partly (I ſuppoſe) out of Melancholy, not caring to adorn that Perſon ſlighted by him I loved; and partly out of Pride, vainly imagining, that the World applauded me, and admired that a Perſon, in the Bloom of Youth, ſhou’d ſo perfectly abdicate the World with all thoſe Allurements, which ſeldom fail to pleaſe our Sex, in all the Stages of our Lives, but much more in the juvenile part of our time: but thus it was, I ſought vain Glory through differing Paths, I ſeem’d to ſcorn (what I really courted) popular Applauſe; and hid a proud Heart under a humble Habit. The Conſideration of this makes me ſee how difficult it is to draw a Scheme of vertuous Politicks, whereby to govern this little Microcoſm but by that Model of all Perfection, Deny thy ſelf&c and that not only in Deeds, but in the moſt ſecret Intentions: for whilſt I ſtrove to caſt out the Devil of Love, I made room for Pride, with all its vile Adherents.
However, I thought I had ſet my ſelf in a good, and convenient road, to D paſs 018 D1v 18 paſs on my Life’s Pilgrimage; but this my deſign’d Tranquility was diſturb’d by the frequent Viſits of Boſvil, who, as a Kinſman, and a Friend, had free Acceſs to our Houſe; and tho’ he made no formal, or direct Addreſs to me, yet his Eyes darted Love, his Lips ſmil’d Love, his Heart ſigh’d Love, his Tongue was the only part ſilent in the Declaration of a violent Paſſion: that between his cold Silence, and his Sun-ſhine Looks, I was like the Traveller in the Fable; the warm Rays of his Eyes made me caſt away that Garment of firm Reſolution, which the Coldneſs of his Silence had made me to wrap cloſe about my Heart.
But why my Galeſia(ſaid Lucaſia) did you not conſult your Parents, and in particular your Mother, whoſe Care and Prudence might have adjuſted the Buſineſs to all your Satisfactions? I conſider’d much on that Point (reply’d Galeſia) but I concluded if I diſcover’d it to my Mother, ſhe wou’d diſcourſe him about it, and he perhaps might put it off with a Laugh, and ſay, he had only rallied with his young Couſin during her Reſidence in London, to try how her Heart was fortified againſt ſuch-like Aſſaults 019 D2r 19 Aſſaults. So by this means I ſhould have paſs’d for an ignorant Country Girl, not capable of judging between Jeſt and Earneſt; which wou’d have grated hard upon my proud Humour. Wherefore I reſolv’d (that as long as he remain’d ſilent towards my Parents) to take all he ſaid or did as Railery, or little Efforts of Gallantry. Thus, Fool as I was! I conceal’d from my dear Mother the thing in which I had greateſt need of her Counſel, and Conduct: And as moſt young People have too great an Opinion of their own Wiſdom, ſo I (no doubt) thought my ſelf as capable to make, or uſe a Conqueſt, as any Town Lady arm’d Cap a pee, with all ſorts of Embelliſhments, and who had ſerved divers Campaigns under Venus’s Banner; but too late I found my Weakneſs and Folly in this my opinionated Wiſdom.
Boſvil frequently came to our Houſe, where he made the outward Grimaces of a Lover, with an indifferent interiour; whilſt I bore up an outſide Indifferency, with a Heart full of Paſſion: Thus a Mask is put on, ſometimes, to conceal an ill Face, and ſometimes to preſerve a good one: And the moſt part of Mankind are in reality different from D2 what 020 D2v 20 what they ſeem; and affect to be thought what they are not; Youth affects to be thought older, and they of ripe Years, younger; the ſober young Gentleman affects to talk like a Rake, and the Town-Miſs to pretend to Modeſty. Therefore I wonder not, that I, ſilly Country Girl, aſſum’d to my ſelf a Diſcretion, which Time and want of Experience had deny’d me. But things were on this footing, when Mr. Brafort, Couſin to my dead Lover Brafort, caſt his Eyes on me with greater Eſteem than I merited; and as if he had been deſtin’d to chuſe the Devil for his Confeſſor, he choſe my Couſin Boſvil for his Confident, deſiring him to introduce him to me, and make his Propoſals to my Parents. Brafort knew nothing of Boſvil’s pretended Inclinations for me, but addreſs’d to him as my near Relation, and intimate Friend. To this Boſvil freely reply’d, that he could not ſerve him, ſaying, that he deſign’d his Couſin Galeſia for himself; and was ſo far from introducing any body to her on that ſcore, that he ſhoul’d be very careful to keep off all Pretenders. Upon which Mr. Brafort remain’d ſatisfied, and laid all Thoughts of me aside.To 021 D3r 21
To an exact Perfection he had brought
The Action Love, the Paſſion he forgot.
This Tranſaction, tho’ coming to me by a third hand, gave me a ſtrong Belief of Boſvil’s Sincerity; and made me interpret every little dubious Word, which he ſometimes mix’d with his fond Actions, to be Demonſtrations of a real Paſſion; not doubting but a little time wou’d ripen the ſame into an open Declaration to my Parents, as well as formerly to me, and now lately to young Brafort. In the mean time attributing this Delay to his Prudence, in acquainting himſelf with my Humour, and Inclinations, before he gave himſelf irrevocably to me; which made me regulate my Behaviour with the diſcreeteſt Precautions my poor unexperienced Thoughts cou’d dictate. My Grammar Rules now became harſh Impertinences, for I thought I had learnt Amo and Amor, by a ſhorter and ſurer Method, and the only Syntax I ſtudied, was how to make ſuitable Anſwers to my Father, and him, when the long’d-for Queſtion ſhou’d be propos’d; that I might not betray my Weakneſs in 022 D3v 22 in a too ready Compliance, nor ruin my Satisfaction in too rigid an Oppoſition.
In the mean time, a Friend of mine that had married a Siſter of my dead Lover, Brafort; and for that Reaſon he and his Wife always call’d me Siſter; This Gentleman, whether out of Kindneſs, or Curioſity, or because their Cousin the young Brafort had diſcover’d his Inclinations for me; had a great Deſire to inform himſelf of the Secret between me and Boſvil; for he and his Wife being much in our Company, cou’d not but remark ſomething in his Carriage towards me: and being very intimate with Boſvil, told him, that he wonder’d that he being an only Child, and Heir to a conſiderable Eſtate, beſide his growing Practice in the Law, did not fix on a Wife; thereby to eſtabliſh his Family, and make his aged Parents happy. That Affair is not undone, reply’d Boſvil, till this time of Day, for I am fix’d on my Neighbour Mr. Lowland’s Daughter; and hope ſhortly to enjoy your good Company, with the reſt of my Friends, and Relations, at the Celebration of our Marriage. This Anſwer my Friend little expected to receive: however believing it con- 023 D4r 23 concern’d me nearly, took the firſt Opportunity to tell me, which he did, in a frank, jocoſe manner, not ſeeming to ſuſpect how great my Concern was, which indeed was the greateſt in the World. The Notes of a ſtuttering Cuccoo are not half ſo diſagreeable, tho’ they ſing he Springs Obſeqies, and proclaim Silence to the whole Quire of chirping Muſicians. The Edifice I had ſo lately built on the Foundation of that Diſcourse between Boſvil and young Brafort, prov’d a meer airy nothing, ſerving only to make my Fall the greater, by how much I had raiſed my Hopes on its Battlements. I ſpent my Days in Sighs, and my Nights in Tears; my Sleep forſook me, and I reliſh’d not my Food; nor had I made any Friend or Confident; into whoſe Boſom I might diſcharge my Griefs; or recieve Conſolation. My dear Brother was then at Paris, to improve his Studies in that Univerſity, where, complaining of his Abſence, I alſo hinted this other Original of my Sorrows.
Nothing at preſent wonted Pleaſure yields,
The Birds, nor Buſhes, nor the gaudy Fields;
Nor Oiſer Holts, nor Banks of Glenn are ſeen,
Nor the ſoft Meadow crown’d with tufted Green,
Are half ſo pleaſant now, or half ſo fair
As when we mus’d together kindly there,
And thought each Blade of Corn a Jem did bear!
Inſtead of this, and thy Philpſophy,
Nought but my own falſe Latin now I ſee,
Falſe Verſe, or Lover falſeſt of the three.
Thus I walk’d on in Sorrow, and Deſolation, without reflecting, that my Vanity deſerved a greater Punuſhment; for in our Youth we commonly Dreſs our Thoughts in the Mirrour of Self‑ Flattery, and expect Heaven, Fortune, and the World ſhould cajole our Follies, as we do our own; and lay all Faults upon others, and all Praiſe on our ſelves: how far I was guilty of this, I know not; but whatever I deſerv’d from the Hand of juſt Heaven, I deſerv’d nothing but well from Bolſvil, whoſe Scorn (the Cauſe of my Afflictions) I endeavour’d to conceal, yet ſpight of my Induſtry, this Melancholy, together with my plain Dreſs, was taken notice of; and it was believed I mourn’d for 025 E1r 25 for Brafort. My Parents fearing this might prove a Hinderance to my Fortune, commanded me to quit that plain Dreſs, and endeavour to forget Brafort. This their Fancy of my Affection for Mr. Brafort I did not much contradict, it being a proper Cur-feu to that Flame I had for Boſvil. Thus we see how eaſily we are deceiv’d by outward Appearances, and what Care we ought to take of cenſuring, judging, or condemning Things, or Perſons; without knowing the true, and genuine Cauſe of Contingencies; which are often very hard to be underſtood; for according to the Fable, the Aſs ſeems valiant in the Lyon’s Skin, and the Crow glorious, in her borrow’d Plumes. We often give undeſerv’d Applauſe where Fortune makes a Fool her Favourite; and on the other ſide, condemn the wiſeſt Deſigns when not attended with Succeſs. We are Fortunes Machines, and the Alarm of popular Applauſe muſt run off, as ſhe is pleas’d to turn the Key of our Affairs. But pardon (Madam) this Digreſſion, and give me leave to return.
After my foreſaid Diſcourse with my Friend, that he had told me of Boſvil’s intended Marriage with Mrs. Lowland E there 026 E1v 26 there paſs’d many Weeks that I neither ſaw, nor heard from him; he keeping cloſe at his Father’s Houſe (which was about twenty Miles from us) where I thought he paſs’d his time at the Feet of his fair Miſtreſs Lowland, who lived in his Father’s Neighbourhood: But the Truth is, he was detain’d by a light, but a lingering Sickneſs; in which time I gain’d much upon my diſtemper’d Mind, and thought my ſelf ſo perfectly cured, as never more to relapſe by the Infection of any Lover, how contagious ſoever Youth, Gallantry, or Riches, might render him. But alas! I had not yet paſs’d the Dog-days of Boſvil’s hot Purſuits, but at his Return he entertain’d me in another manner than ever; for if before he admir’d, eſteem’d, or had a Paſſion for me, he now doted, ador’d, and dy’d for me! Vow’d a thouſand times, that he cou’d not live without me, that his Paſſion had been the Cauſe of his late Indiſpoſition; and wou’d be of his Death, if he did not apply the Salutary Remedy of Hymen’s Rites. In order to which he had brought a Licenſe with him; and therewithal took it out of his Pocket, and ſhew’d it to me. All which ſo aſtoniſh’d, pleas’d, and 027 E2r 27 and confounded me, that I knew not what to reply! But, with Tears in my Eyes, told him, that I was wholly nonplus’d, and knew not what Interpretation to make of all that had paſs’d between him and me! ’Tis true, reply’d he, I have been extreamly remiſs in my Devoirs towards you; for which I deserve the utmoſt Puniſhment your Scorn can inflict, nor ſhou’d I dare to ask Pardon of a Goodneſs leſs perfect: Be not cruel then to your Penitent, but forgive him who now asks it, with all Submiſſion; him, who vows never to offend you; him, who ſwears to ſuffer any thing, rather than deſerve your Anger; him who dedicates every Action of his Life to love, pleaſe, and ſerve you. Ceaſe, ſaid I, these Aſſeverations; I never pretended to be diſpleas’d with you; and as you have done nothing to offend me, ſo I have done nothing to deſerve your Love, beyond that of a Kinſwoman or a Friend; which I hope I ſhall never loſe; but as ſuch I ſhall and will for ever love you. Friend, reply’d he, teſtify the same in ſaving my Life, which as a wretched Criminal I beg; and as a faithful Lover E2 hope 028 E2v 28 hope to receive from your Goodneſs, in conſenting to a ſpeedy Marriage: for, without that, you cannot pretend to either Friendſhip, Love, or Charity it ſelf; my Life, and Love being now inſeperable. Sure, dear Couſin, ſaid I, (with a Tone wholly confus’d) you forget in whoſe Company you are, and believe your ſelf with fair Mrs. Lowland: If ſuch an amorous Slumber has caſt you into this Delirium, pray awake, and behold before you, your Couſin Galeſia. I need no Monitor (reply’d he) to tell me it is my Couſin Galeſia, with whom I converſe at preſent: Her reſerv’d Behaviour, with which ſhe treats me her faithful Lover, is a ſufficient Demonſtration, that it is the prudent, vertuous, chaſt Galeſia! It is this reſerved Mein, Madam, which has often deter’d me, and commanded my Tongue to a reſpectful Silence; whilſt my poor Heart, over-charg’d with Paſſion, only eas’d it ſelf with Sighs, and my Looks were the only Language whereby to expreſs my interiour Thoughts. How far your Silence has been guilty of your Suffering (reply’d I) is not eaſie for me to penetrate; but I believe the Inſincerity of this Declaration, might prove very 029 E3r 29 very obnoxious to my Quiet, if my preingaged Reſolution of a ſingle Life, did not ſecure me from thoſe Dangers, to which my Youth, and your Merit might betray me. Ah Madam! reply’d he, and it is poſſible you ſhou’d doubt the Sincerity of what I now aſſert? The great God of Heaven that created us, knows what I ſay is true, when I ſay I love you above all things in this World! That I will never marry any Woman but your ſelf; that I never did, can, or will, place any Beauty or Intereſt in competition with you; that I have thought of nothing but you ſince the Moment I beheld you; that I deny’d my ſelf all of the Diverſions of the Town for your ſake; and when I tug’d the Oar of Coke upon Littleton, and other harſh Studies, it was to arrive ſafe at the Harbour of your Embrace! This Heaven knows to be true, and not Heaven only, but there is not a Perſon on Earth, with whom I have convers’d that has not been entertained with Galeſia’s Perfections, and my Paſſion; there is not a Perſon of my Acquaintance but has heard that I love Galeſia. Ah Madam! This is true, Heaven that inſpir’d me with this vertuous Affection,on 030 E3v 30 on, knows it to be true! Earth, which adores you, knows it to be true! And even you your ſelf know it to be true! Look into your own Conſcience, and it will bear witneſs to this Truth, that I have lov’d you ſince the firſt Moment that I ſaw you. Remember (Madam) how, after the firſt Salutations, I ſat and Gaz’d on you with ſuch a deep Surprize, that there was little Difference between me, and a Statue, except ſometimes a ſtolen Sigh, which call’d the Blood into your Cheeks, and made me know (that young as you were) you underſtood that Language. Moreover, Madam, that when I ſat at Table, I could not eat for looking on you, inſomuch that your charitable Mother thinking me indiſpos’d ſent to her Cloſet for a Cordial: Then it was I gaz’d that Life away, you know refuſe to ſave, and have ever ſince labour’d under deadly Pangs; and after thus ſuffering Martyrdom, to have the Truth of what I profeſs call’d in Queſtion, is downright Tyranny. Thoſe (reply’d I) who have once ſwerv’d from the Faith they profeſs, ought always to be ſuſpected; you have lov’d Mrs. Lowland--and ſo ſtop’d with a ſtolen Sigh. With that he call’d 031 E4r 31 call’d to mind what he had ſaid to my Friend; and told me all he had then ſaid, was only to put a ſtop to his Curioſity, not thinking it proper to name me as the Object of his deſign’d Eſpouſals, without my Leave; and then, again and again, call’d Heaven to witneſs that he lov’d me above all terreſtial Beings: And if you believe me not (continu’d he) I hope you will believe my Father, who intends to be here next Week, to bear witneſs of this Truth: He will tell you how often I have avow’d it to him, when he has propos’d Matches to me; telling him nothing but my fair Couſin, the vertuous Galeſia, cou’d make me happy. My fond Mother alſo, when ſhe hears me ſigh, knows it is for you, and then blames your Cruelty. If you perſiſt in this Rigor, you will not only cauſe my Death, but theirs alſo whoſe Lives are bound up in mine. When my Father comes, I hope you will Compaſſionate his Years, when he courts you for his only Child; think how much your tender Mother loves you, and then conſider mine; and as your Tenderneſs extends to them, ’tis hoped you ſhall have little Beauties of your own to do the ſame one day for you.In 032 E4v 32
In this kind of Diſcourſe, My Lucaſia, we paſs’d ſome Hours, and it was with great Difficulty that I reſtrain’d my fooliſh Tongue from telling the Fondneſs of my Heart, but the Reſtraint was with ſuch broken Words, ſtolen Sighs, ſuppreſs’d Tears, that the meereſt Freſh-man in Love’s Academy, cou’d not but read and underſtand that Language; much more he, that had paſs’d Graduate amongſt the Town Amours. What Interpretation he made I know not, but I thought my ſelf ſafe landed on Love’s Shore, where no croſs Wind, unſeen Accident, cou’d oppoſe my Paſſage to Hymen’s Palace, or wrack me in this Harbour of true Satisfaction: For, ſince he aſſur’d me of his Parents Conſent, I know him to be too advantagious a Party to be refus’d by mine: Now my Thoughts ſwam in a Sea of Joy, which meeting with the Torrent of the for esaid Vexations, made a kind of a dangerous Rencounter, ready to overſet my Reaſon. I paſs’d ſome Nights without Sleep, and Days without Food, my reaſon of this ſecret Satsfaction. At laſt, I fell aſleep in a Corner of our Garden, and dream’d, that, on a ſuddain,dain 033 F1r 33 dain, an angry Power carried me away, and made me climb a high Mountain: at laſt brought me to that Shade where I had heretofore writ thoſe Verſes on the Bark of an Aſh, as I told you, in which I ſeem’d to prefer the Muſes, and a ſtudious Life, before that of Marriage, and Buſineſs. Whereupon, ――My uncouth Guardian ſaid ―― Unlucky Maid! Since, ſince thou haſt the Muſes choſe, Hymen, and Fortune are thy Foes. For Thou ſhalt have Caſſandra’s Fate, In all thou ſay’ſt, unfortunate, The God of Wit gave Her this Curſe, And Fortune ſends Thee this, and worſe. In all thou doſt, tho’ ne’er ſo good, By all the World miſunderſtood! In beſt of Actions, be deſpis’d! And Fools, and Knaves, above thee priz’d! Foes like Serpents hiſs and bite thee, All thy Friends agree to ſlight thee! Love and Lovers, give thee Pain, For they, and thou ſhalt love in vain! Either Death ſhall from thee take ’em Or they thee, or thou forſake ’em! Thy Youth and Fortune vainly ſpend, And in thy Age have not a Friend! F Thy 034F1v 34 Thy whole Life paſs in Diſcontent, In Want, in Woe, and Baniſhment! Be broken under Fortunes Wheel, Direct thy Actions ne’er ſo well. A thouſand other Ills beſide Fortune does ſtill for them provide, Who to the Muſes are ally’d At this Harangue, my Grief was ſo extream, That I awak’d all Joy it prov’d a Dream.
But it has prov’d ſo true in the Event, that I think one can hardly call it ſo, but a real Viſion, as may appear by the Sequel of my Story, to which I return.
Many Days, and Weeks Paſ’d; and ſeveral Viſits he made me, with repeated Aſſurances of his Paſſion; ſtill expecting the Coming of his Father. How far my Looks, or Geſtures, might betray my Thoughts, I know not; but I kept my Words cloſe Priſoners, till they ſhou’d be at Liberty by the Deſire of his Father, or the Command of mine; or at leaſt convey’d into the Mouth of my prudent Mother. Thus I thought I planted my Actions in a good Soil, in the Ground of Vertue; and wateredtered 035 F2r 35 tered them with the Stream of Diſcretion: But the Worm of Pride, and Selfeſteem was at the bottom, and gnaw’d the Root I did not enough reflect on the Author of all Good; but thought perhaps I trod the Path of Vertue, by the Clue of my own Wiſdom, and without due Reflection and Thanks to the Donor. Which is, as if one ſhou’d daily wind up a Watch, and keep it clean, but never ſet it to the Hour: By which means the little Machine is uſeleſs, tho’ it go never ſo well; ſo if we perform all moral Vertues, without directing them to Heaven, they prove little available to our Happineſs.
Whether Boſvi knew, or was inform’d that his Father wou’d not come, or was impatient of his Delay, I know not; but he diſpos’d himſelf to go to his Father, who liv’d twenty Miles from us, as before remark’d tho’ my Lover had eſtabliſh’d himſelf in our Neighbourhood, both for his Health, it being a more ſerene Air, and more convenient for his Practice, being nearer London. When he took his Leave of me, he beg’d me a thouſand times to remember him when abſent. How is it poſſible (ſaid he) that I ſhall paſs this tedious F2 time 036 F2v 36 time without you. Every Minute that I am from you, ſeems an Age; nothing is grateful, nothing ſatisfactory without you; my Senſes take Pleaſure in nothing but you, even Reaſon loſes her Regency; and I rave on nothing but my abſent Galeſia. Ah! that I might call you truly mine: However, let me flatter my ſelf, that I am ſo far yours; that you will not quite forget me when abſent; but pity my Baniſhment; pity, and promiſe to think on me; promiſe but that, and I ſhall conſolate my ſelf with that Thought; our Souls have ſubtle ways of correſponding, they will converſe, when theſe terreſtrial Organs know nothing of the Matter: Then breathe a Sigh, and bid it go to your Boſvil, it will meet whole Legions of mine, which will ſurround it, and bring it ſafe to my Heart unmix’d with common Air; and, when you are in your ſolitary Walks, whiſper that you want your Boſvil’s Company and ſome little waiting Spirit appointed by my good Genius, to attend you, ſhall quickly bring it to his Maſter, and I ſhall in a Moment, by a ſecret Inſpiration, know my Galeſia’s Deſires; and ſo be happy at a Diſtance! Then promiſe me, my Sweet, 037 F3r 37 Sweet, my Fair, my Bright Charmer! this ſmall Conſolation; this is the way by which Souls converſe, independent of theſe heavy Tenements in which they are impriſon’d: Promiſe this, and your Boſvil ſhall not be quite unhappy in this three Weeks Abſence; which otherwiſe will be a Tedium to me. In this manner he took his leave of me. All which I anſwer’d with alternate Smiles, Sighs, and broken Words, ſcarce containing common Senſe.
When he was gone, I thought on him perpetually; I ſigh’d every Moment, I counted the whiling Hours and Moments of his Abſence; wiſh’d this tedious three Weeks cut out of the Records of Time, often repeating to my ſelf his Vows, and Aſſurances of everlaſting Love, reſolving to be no longer cruel to my ſelf, and him; but let him know what mighty Sums of Love I had been hoarding up for him, ſince the Moment of our firſt Interview. O my Boſvil (ſaid I to my ſelf) I will let thee know, how true a Maſter thou haſt been of my Affections; I will beg thy Pardon for the Pains I have made thee feel, by my ſeeming Indifference; and kindly reproach thee for thy feigned Neg- 038 F3v 38 Negligence; and then repair all with infinite Teſtimonies of everlaſting Fidelity: Tye my ſelf to thee in Nuptial Bands, and ratify all by a conſtant Obedience. Thus, a thouſand rambling Thoughts, a thouſand fond Fancies agitated my poor young Head, and Heart! Sometimes I buſied my ſelf, with thinking what I was to ſay to his Father, whom I concluded he wou’d bring along with him. I ſaid, and unſaid a thouſand things. This Speech I fear’d betray’d too much Fondneſs, that too little Kindneſs: This ſeem’d too ſubmiſſive to the Son, that not reſpectful enough to the Father. Now I ſtudy’d what Excuſe to make to my Mother, for having ſo long conceal’d from her a Matter of ſuch Importance; then what to ſay to my Father, for being ſo ready to leave him for a Husband. Thus I paſs’d my Hours in perpetual Agitation of Mind, part of which was, what Clothes, what Friends, what Ceremonies ſhou’d be at this my approaching Marriage.
The tedious three Weeks being elapſed. Boſvil arrives, but not my Lover: He came with greater Coldneſs, and Indifferency than ever! No Ray of Love 039 F4r 39 Love darted from his Eyes, no Sigh from his Heart, no Smile towards me, nothing, nothing, but a dusky cold Indifferency, as if Love had never ſhin’d in his Hemiſphere! The Truth is, I took it for Diſguiſe, but cou’d not imagine what ſhou’d make him put it on; I thought the Mumming went too far, when the Maſqueraders murther’d thoſe they pretended to divert; but to convince me that this was no feign’d Indifference, he ſtay’d ſeveral Days at our Houſe, acting this Scene of Inconſtancy to Perfection. Much I ſtudied, but cou’d think of nothing that cou’d have diſoblig’d him; I examining my Words to find if I had ſaid any thing that might have been affronting at his Arrival. I conſulted my Glaſs to ſee if my Perſon was changed in that fatal three Weeks: I reflected on all things, from the beginning, to the end; but cou’d find nothing whereof to accuſe my ſelf; ſometimes in my Thoughts I confronted his paſt Kindneſs, with his preſent Coldneſs; his paſſionate Speeches, Looks, and Geſtures, with his Neglect, Coldneſs, and Indifferency; one rais’d my Hopes above Ela, the other caſt my Deſpair below Gamut. Thus I ran Diviſionsſions 040 F4v 40 ſions in my Fancy, which made but harſh Muſick to my Interiour: Methoughts I reſembled the Siſters in Hell, whom the Poets feign to catch Water in a Sieve.
Now whether this Affliction was laid on me by the immediate Hand of Providence, or that Fate, or my Conſtellations produced it by ſecondary Cauſes, I know not; but Innocence was my Conſolation; for I had nothing wherewith to reproach my ſelf; I had acted juſtly, and honourably towards him; he cou’d not upbraid me either with Coyneſs, or Kindneſs; for tho’ I had ſquar’d my Actions, by the exact Rules of Vertue, and Modeſty; yet I did not exclude Civility, and good Nature; for I always ſtay’d in his Company, heard him, laugh’d, fool’d, and jeſted with him; yet not ſo freely as to tranſgreſs good Manners, or break Reſpect on either ſide; all which might aſſure a Perſon leſs judicious than himſelf, that neither his Perſon, not Propoſals, were diſagreeable. All theſe Conſiderations ſerved to render his Coldneſs the more ſurprizing; but it pleas’d God to have it thus; Boſvil perhaps was my Idol, and rival’d Heaven in my Affections, that 041 G1r 41 that I might ſay to him, as Cowley to his Miſtreſs. Thou even my Prayers doſt ſteal from me,For I with wild Idolatry,Begin to God, and end ’em all in Thee.
This Viciſſitude in my Affairs, made me reflect on thoſe Verſes, or Viſion, which ſaid, Hymen and Fortune are thy Foes,&c. In which I endeavour’d to be reſign’d, ſaying, It is the Lord’s Doing, tho’ marvellous in my Eyes. Tho’ nothing cou’d be harſher, than to be thus abandoned in the Flower of my Youth, and that by my own Relation, who ought to have ſuſtain’d me against any falſe Pretender: I endeavour’d to detach my Thoughts from him; or if it was ſo that I muſt needs think on him, I reſolved it ſhou’d be on his Crimes, Falſhood, and Cruelty.
Thus by degrees his Company became troubleſom, and his Preſence ungrateful. Yet cou’d I not avoid either, for I had no Reaſon to quarrel with him, unleſs for not courting me, as formerly: And that was turning the Tables, and making my ſelf the Lover, inſtead of the Perſon beloved; which was G not 042 G1v 42 not only contradictory to my haughty Humour, but ſeem’d in a manner to invert Nature; nevertheleſs I forc’d my ſelf to bear it, with a ſeeming Equality of Mind, till a fit Occaſion wou’d offer it ſelf to my Revenge. Like the Quaker that is ſmitten on the one Cheek, turns the other alſo; but after that having (as he thinks) fulfill’d the Law, can beat his Adverſary as well as any carnal Man: ſo I waited but for a left Cheek-blow; ſome ungrateful Action, that might give at leaſt a ſeeming juſt Cauſe to quarrel, ſo as to take occaſion to baniſh him; his Preſence being as diſagreeable to me as a Specter; for it’s natural enough, that the Cauſe of Grief, ſhou’d be the Object of Averſion.
I remain’d full of this Wiſh many Months; at laſt Fortune was a little propitious to my Deſires, at leaſt I wreſtled an Occaſion to my Caprice, which was thus.
Boſvil and another young Gentleman his Friend, met my Father at a certain Place over a Bottle; here Boſvil propoſed his Friend to my Father as an Huſband for me, all Conditions of Portion and Joynture were there propos’d, and approv’d on both ſides, and the Day appointedpointed 043 G2r 43 pointed on which the Gentleman ſhou’d come to viſit me, which was to be the Week following. This my Father told me with Satisfaction, withal minding me, how much I was obliged to my Couſin Boſvil: To which my Anſwers were few, dubious, and obſcure; which paſs’d with my good Father, for a little Virgin Surprize; which Diſcourſes of this nature are apt to raiſe in the Hearts of young Creatures. But, O my Lucaſia! I cannot tell you what I ſuffer’d when I was alone, Rage and Madneſs ſeiz’d me; Malice, and Revenge were all I thought on: I inſpired an evil Genius, reſolv’d his Death, and pleas’d my ſelf in the Fancy of a barbarous Revenge: I ſhall delight my ſelf, to ſee the Blood pour out of his falſe Heart; In order to accompliſh this deteſtable Freak, I went towards the Place of his Abode, ſuppoſing a Rapier in my hand, and ſaying to my ſelf; The falſe Boſvil ſhou’d now diſquiet me no more, nor any other of our Sex; in him I will end his Race, no more of them ſhall come to diſtrub, or affront Womankind; this only Son, ſhall dye by the hands of me an only Daughter; and however the World may call it Cruelty, or barbarous;G2 rous 044 G2v 44 rous; I am ſure our Sex will have reaſon to thank me, and keep an Annual Feſtival, on which a Criminal like him is executed: The Example perhaps will deter others, and ſecure many from the Wrongs of ſuch falſe Traitors; and I be magnified in future times; for it was for ridding the World of a Monſter, that Hercules was eſteem’d ſo great a Hero, and George a Saint. Then ſure I ſhall be rank’d in the Catalogue of Heroines, for ſuch a Service done to my Sex: for certainly the Deſerts of Arabia never produced a more formidable Monſter, than this unaccountable Boſvil. Behold what Sophiſms one can find to juſtify any mad Attempt, and how for the gratifying our Fancy, we are ready to affront, if not quite reverſe the Laws of Nature: that, if the Feebleneſs of our Hands did not moderate the Fury of our Heads, Woman ſometimes wou’d exceed the fierceſt Savages; eſpecially, when affronted in her Amours: which brings into my Mind a Vese or two on ſuch an Occasion. A ſlighted Woman oft a Fury grows, And for Revenge quits her Baptiſmal Vows, Becomes a Witch, and does a Fiend eſpouſe. In 045 G3r 45 In theſe wild Thoughts I wander’d, till Wearineſs made me know my own Weakneſs, and Incapacity of performing, what Fury had inſpir’d; and forced me to ſeek Repoſe under the firſt Shade; where my flowing Tears mitigated the Heat of my Rage, waſhing away thoſe extravagant Thoughts, and made me turn my Anger againſt my ſelf, my wretched ſelf, that woful and unworthy thing; the Scorn of my Kinſman, Lover, Friend, &c. A thouſand times I wiſh’d tha ſome kind Serpent wou’d creep out of its Hole, and ſting me to Death, or that Thunder wou’d deſcend, and ſtrike me into the Earth; and ſo at once perform my Death, and Funeral! O no (ſaid I) that wou’d render Boſvil too happy. I muſt go home and write the whole Scene of his Treachery, and then on my ſelf act the laſt part of the Tragedy. With theſe Thoughts I bubled my froward Fancy, and ſo returning home very weary, I threw my ſelf on my Bed, where all my Reſentment became a Prey to gentle Slumbers; which much refreſh’d my weary Body, and more weary Mind; rendering me a little capable of acting according to the Dictates of Reaſon; but 046 G3v 46 but not without a large Mixture of Paſſion; that when I awak’d, I writ to him after this Bizar manner.
I Thought you had been ſo well acquainted with my Humour, touching a Married Life, as to know it to be my Averſion, therefore wonder you ſhou’d make ſuch a Proposal to my Father on your Friends Behalf: perhaps you will ſay it was but in jeſt, and I believe it was no more; but I beg you to make ſomething elſe the Subject of your Raillery, and leave me out, till Misbehaviour render me the proper Object of Ridicule, which has not hithero; for I have done nothing diſhonourable to my ſelf, nor diſobliging to you; therefore ought rather to be the Object of Civility than Banter, which perhaps, Diſtance and Abſence may accompliſh; therefore I beg you will ſee me no more, til Fortune commiſſion you by the Change of your Condition; in the mean time I ſhall remain,
Your Kinſwoman, and humble Servant,
In the Simplicity of theſe Words were a great deal of Cunning, and under the Shadow of Frowardneſs, lay cover’d much Kindneſs, which I knew he muſt diſcern, if we had any real Affection for me in his Heart; for Love is like Ghoſts, or Spirits that will appear, to thoſe to whom they wou’d ſpeak, and to others are quite inviſible. I pleas’d my ſelf I had taken this Occaſion, at once to command his Abſence, and in a covert manner teſtify my Affection; for I knew that was the natural Interpretation of my Words, See me no more. For nothing but a real Miſtreſs cou’d pretend to uſe them; and nothing but a fond Miſtreſs cou’d pretend to be diſpleas’d at the Preſence of a Kinſman, or a Friend; for having offer’d an advantageous Marriage in the Person of his Friend. Here was now no Medium left, no Space between open Lover, and open Enemy; here was now no more Love-Frolicks to be acted under the Diſguiſe of a Friend, or Kinſman; if he came to me after ſuch a Prohibition, he muſt come upon the Pikes of my Anger, which he cou’d not pretend to appeaſe by any other Atonement, but that of his everlaſting Love 048 G4v 48 Love in Marriage-Vows. If he ſtay’d away, I had my Ends I had long ſought, the being rid of one that gave me ſo much Diſquiet. Thus I ſatisfied my ſelf in expectation of his Anſwer, which came next Day in theſe Words.
I Am extremely aſtonish’d, to find you ſo diſpleas’d at what paſs’d the other Day, which was no way meant to your Prejudice, but on the contrary, much to your Advantage. However, Madam, I ſhall not juſtifie what you are pleas’d to condemn; but add alſo to the Teſtimony of my Obedience, in ſubmitting to your Prohibition, and not preſume to ſee you more, tho’ in it I ſequeſter my ſelf from thoſe Charms I have ſo long ador’d; and only at a Diſtance admire what your Rigor forbids me to approach, and ſo reſt,
Madam, Your Kinſman, and humble Servant,
This his complying with ſeeing me no more, gave me the ſame Satisfaction, that a Patient has, when his Limbs are cutting off, the Remedy, and the Diſease being both grievous; however, I know now what I had to truſt to, and therefore ſtudy’d to make a Virtue of this Neceſſity, and conſolate my ſelf with patient ſuffering what I cou’d no ways avoid. I experienc’d amply the Word of the Sage, that was all Vanity and Vexation of Spirit, and every Act of our Lives Folly, except offer’d to the Glory of God. I reflected on my late extravagant Rage, when I deſign’d his Death, and knew I ought to cry earneſtly to be deliver’d from Blood-Guiltineſs. I retir’d into my ſelf, and return’d to my Studies, the Woods, Fields, and Paſtures had the moſt part of my time; by which means I became as perfect in Rural Affairs as any Arcadian Shepherdeſs; inſomuch, that my Father gave me abſolute Power and Authority over his Servants and Labourers; it was I that appointed them their Work, and pay’d them their Wages; I put in and put out who I pleas’d; and was as abſolute over my Ruſticks, as the great Turk over his Subjects; and tho’ this H was 050 H1v 50 was a great Fatigue, yet it gratified my Vanity, that I cou’d perform things above my Age and Sex; and tho’ it was an impediment to my Studies, yet it made amends, it being it ſelf a Study, and that a moſt uſeful one: The Rules to ſow and reap in their proper Seaſons, to know what Paſture is fit for Beeves, and what for milch’d Kine, with all their Branches, being a more uſeful Study than the exacteſt Grammar-Rules, or Longitude, or Latitude, Squaring the Circle, &c. The Farmer, according to the Utility of his Occupation, deſerves to hold the firſt Rank amongſt Mankind: that one may juſtly reflect with Veneration on thoſe times, when Kings and Princes thought it no Derogation to their Princely Dignities. The Nobles in ancient times, did not leave their Country Seats, to become the Habitation of Jack-daws, and the Manufactory of Spiders, who in reproach to their Miſtreſs, prepare Hangings to ſupply thoſe the Moth has devoured, thro’ her Negligence, or Abſence. But to return from whence I digreſs’d. This Rural Buſineſs was ſo full of Employment, that its continual Fatigue contributed very much to the Eaſe of my Thoughts touch- 051 H2r 51 touching Boſvil. The conſtant Incumbrance which attended this Station, left no ſpace for Love to agitate my Interior. The Labour of the Day was recompenc’d with ſound sleep at Night: Thoſe ſilent Hours being paſs’d in Sleep’s Reſtorative, the Day provided new Buſineſs for my waking Thoughts, whilſt Health and wholſome Food repay’d this my Induſtry. Thus in a Country Life we roll on in a Circle, like the heavenly Bodies, our Happineſs being ſeldom eclipſed, unleſs by the Interpoſition of our Follies, or Paſſions. Now finding my ſelf daily to get ground of my ſickly Thoughts, I doubted not of a perfect Recovery. I reflected on thoſe Words of the Poet, and with good Reaſon made their Application. Fac monitis fugias otia, &c. Remed. Amoris.
Fly Sloth if thou wilt Cupid overthrow, breaks his Bow,
Sloth points his Darts, but Buſineſs
Imployment to his Flames is Ice and Snow.H2 Cupid 052 H2v 52
Cupid and Venus are to Sloth inclin’d,
From both, in Buſiness, thou may’ſt ſafety find,
For Love gives place, where Buſineſs fills the Mind.
Morever, that which contributed much to this Victory over my ſelf, was the Return of my Brother from France; his dear Company which I had long wanted, fill’d my Heart with Joy, and exerminated that Melancholy, which had too long perplex’d me: the little Rarities he brought adorn’d my Perſon and garniſh’d my Cloſet; he frequently entertain’d me with the Deſcription of Places, and Cuſtoms of France, in particular Convents, and their way of living, which I ſo admir’d, that I wiſh’d for ſuch Places in England, which if there had been, ’tis certain I had then become a Nun, and under a holy Veil buried all Thoughts of Boſvil. In this my Brother’s dear Company I daily improv’d my Studies, ſo as to begin to underſtand an Author, and none pleas’d me more than thoſe of Phyſick, all which ſerv’d to fill my Head with Notions, and perhaps my Heart with Pride, at beſt but a miſpending of time; Learn- 053 H3r 53 Learning being neither of Uſe not Ornament in our Sex. Some counting a ſtudious Woman as ridiculous as an effeminate Man, and learned Books as unfit for her Appartment, as Paint, Waſhes, and Patches for his. In fine, the Men will not allow it to be our Sphere; ſo conſequently, we can never be ſuppos’d to move in it gracefully; but like the Toad in the Fable, that affected to ſwell it ſelf as big as the Ox, and ſo burſt in the Enterprize: But let the World confine, or enlarge Learning as they pleaſe, I care not; I do not regret the time I beſtow’d in its Company, it having been my good Friend, to bail me from Boſvil’s Fetters, tho’ I am not ſo generous, by way of Return, to paſs my word for its good Behaviour in our Sex always, and in all Perſons.
Now Boſvil having been ſometime abſent, our Family, Friends, and Neighbours, began to take notice of it; and more eſpecially at my Brother’s Return, when every body came to bid him welcome, not only the Gentlemen, but even the Ladies, at leaſt to congratulate my Mother, on his ſafe Arrival.
Now, it was that his pretended Miſtreſs, the fair Lowland was marry’d, which 054 H3v 54 which you will believe was a certain Satisfacrion to me, as Miſchief is to Witches, though they get nothing by it; much as I long’d to banter, and inſult him on this Occaſion; but his conſtant Abſence depriv’d me of that Pleaſure. However, I cou’d not paſs over ſuch a Field of full ripe Content, without cropping ſome few Ears. Wherefore I writ him a Letter in a counterfeit Character, and withal ſent him a Willow‑ Garland, to crown on the forſaken Lover, which indeed was ſo well made of Gumwork, that one might take it for a real Branch of that forſaken Tree. This, with divers other Emblems, and Motto’s, I ſent him to London by the Carrier.
How he receiv’d this, I know not, neither did I care; but I was told afterwards that he laugh’d, and told his Friends what a pretty Preſent he had receiv’d from an unknown Hand; and withal that he wou’d ſecure himſelf from the like Attacks, by his ſpeedy Marriage; and accordingly proceeded with a young Gentlewoman at London: And at his Return acquainted his Friends, and in particular, a young Gentlewoman of our Relation, who, with 055 H4r 55 with many others, miſtruſted him of an Amour with me; but I not having told her of it, who was in all things elſe my Confident, ſhe laid aſide that Thought, eſpecially now ſince he declar’d to her this his approaching Nuptials. However, ſhe and every body of our Acquaintance was amaz’d at his long Abſence from our Houſe, and ask’d him the Cauſe; to which he anſwer’d indirectly, and with divers Shuffles; but the virtuous Towriſſa (our ſaid Couſin) preſs’d him from time to time, till he, no longer able to reſiſt her Importunities, told her, that his Couſin Galeſia had forbid him; at which ſhe was much ſurpriz’d, but ſaid it ſhou’d not reſt ſo; for (ſaid ſhe) I will have you go to her with me this very Day, that I may obtain the Bleſſing of a Peacemaker. He comply’d with her, and came to make me a Viſit; our Interview, after a whole Year’s Abſence, was ſurprizing to us both, for we trembl’d, bluſh’d, and flatter’d in our Words, that it was with utmoſt Difficulty we perform’d the Civilities of the Occaſion. Ater being ſeated, I remember he gaz’d with all the Eagerneſs, or rather Diſtraction of youth- 056 H4v 56 youthful Eyes, inſtigated by a tender Paſſion; which ſo dazled and confounded me, that I was every moment afraid that I ſhou’d ſink down in the midſt of the Company, who ſat talking of things indifferent. Having for ſome time thus planted the Batteries of our Eyes againſt each other’s Hearts; he gave the firſt Shot by a deep Sigh, ſaying, O curſed Love, that will never leave a Man; and roſe from his Seat, as it were, to diſperſe thoſe Vapours which ſeem’d to oppreſs him; to which I reply’d (foolisſhly enough, with a feign’d Laugh, to ſtifle a real Sigh) that I hop’d he had no reaſon to complain of Love’s Tyranny; yes, yes, ſaid our Couſin Towriſſa, know you not, that our Couſin Boſvil is ſhortly to be marry’d, ſo thinks every Moment a Martyrdom till the Day arrives; therefore, dear Couſin(continu’d ſhe) get your ſelf Dancing-Shoes, if you mean to be a Bride-Maid, &c. to which my Mother gravely anſwer’d that it muſt needs be a great Satisfaction to his Parents, to ſee him their only Child well ſettled.
What a Shock this Diſcourse gave me I cannot deſcribe, but ’tis certain I never 057 I1r 57 never felt any thing like it; behold now, my Lucaſia what was become of all my Reſolutions, and fancy’d Indifferency; ſee what all my Anger, Fury, Scorn, Revenge, prohibiting him to ſee me, the fancied Satisfaction I took in his Abſence, behold, I ſay, what all this came to, even juſt as much as the Lord Rocheſter ſays of Court Promiſes, and Whores Vows, which all End in Nothing; ſo theſe my Reſolutions were all meer Goſſomers, compos’d of Vapours, and carry’d about with an airy Fancy, and next Day reduced to Nothing; but thus it is in moſt things of Human Life, we know not our ſelves, nor our own Incapacity; we think our ſelves able to perform this or that, or look even Death in the Face; and when we have moſt need of our imaginary Fortitude, we find our ſelves moſt deſtitute, and feeble, as I experienc’d in this Rencounter: for I was ready to die in the place, but durſt not remove, fearing my Legs ſhou’d fail me; which I perceiv’d all in Convulſions, and trembling; I was like a Horſe in a Stable on fire, burnt if he ſtays, yet dares not go out; at laſt holding by the Tables, and the Chairs, with feign’d Smiles in my Face, and I jocoſe 058 I1v 58 jocoſe Words in my Mouth; I made a ſhift to paſs this Gantlet, and get into my Chamber, where God only was Witneſs of my Complaints and Succour. In the midſt of my Sighs and Tears, I threw my ſelf on my Bed, roll’d on the Floor, hop’d that every Cramp I felt wou’d be my Death’s Convulſion, utter’d a thouſand Imprecations againſt him, and my hard Fortune; and contrary to that Philoſopher, who thank’d the God that had made him a Man, and not a Beaſt, I ſay quite contrary to him; I wiſh’d my ſelf unſprung of Human Race, Rather than feel ſo piercing a Diſgrace; For what is more diſgraceful to a Maid, What Pangs ſo ſharp her tortur’d Soul invade, As this ſad Curſe——Deſerted and betray’d Thou Heav’n alone my Innocent can’ſt know, The World will ne’er believe that I am ſo, ’Tis contradictory to Human Thought, That Love from vertuous Principles is wrought, That 059 I2r 59 That nobler Paſſions are from Senſe refin’d, And Reaſon over-rules the youthful Mind, But Heav’n knows all, and knows my higher Soul, Did ev’ry meaner End of Love controul, Knows the juſt Schemes of my intended Life, The Chaſt, the Chearful, and the Vertuous Wife. To be a Matron, to my Houſhold Good, A helpful Neighbour in my Neighbourhood, With hoſpitable Table, open Door, One for my Friends, the other for the Poor: Then teach my Family to lead good Lives, And be a Pattern unto other Wives; In doing which a general Good I do, When Wives are good, they make good Husbands too, Thus by degrees might all Mankind be ſo. But Fate, or Fortune, call it what you pleaſe, Takes cruel Sport in baffling Schemes like theſe; Thus all my ſecret Plots and Mines are croſt, The Babel ruin’d, and the Builder loſt; I2 The 060I2v 60 The tow’ring Notions from their airy Height, Are fall’n, and Scorn is added to the Weight. Methinks I hear the People pointing ſay, That, that’s the fond, but ſcorn’d Galeſia. That’s ſhe whoſe Beauty once the Youth inſpir’d, She whom the gazing Scholars Eyes admir’d, For whom the flutt’ring Gallants of the Gown, Deſpis’d their Idol Beauties of the Town. Behold her now abandon’d and forlorn, The idle Object of each Ruſtic’s Scorn; O thus to live, what Female Heart can bear, No, no, I’ll firſt my ſelf in pieces tear, And firſt begin with this diſhevel’d Hair.
After this Hurricane, and divers Guſts of Sighs and Tears, I began to flatter my Fancy, that all this might be a Compoſition, like that of Lowland, and no more of Truth in this his London Miſtreſs, than in that of Miſtreſs Lowland; who was now actually married to another Man: And when by this means the Torments of my diſtorted Mind 061 I3r 61 Mind was a little appeas’d, I endeavour’d to clear my Countenance, waſh’d my Face, took Air at the Window, and ſo went down again to the Company; ſome time paſs’d in Diſcourſe of things indifferent; then Boſvil took leave, and went that Night to his Father’s Houſe.
Towriſſa ſtay’d to bear me Company, and was my Bed-fellow that Night, the greateſt part of which we paſs’d in Diſcourse of Boſvil, ſhe relating to me how ſeriouſly he had told her, and her Mother of his intended Marriage, together with all the Circumſtance of Portion and Jointure, Deſcription of the Lady’s Perſon, and Family, &c. that there was no place left for doubt, for any one but me, who had the Eyes of my Underſtanding ſhut, and ſeal’d up by the former Farce he had acted about Mrs. Lowland. Nevertheleſs, I ſuffer’d great Diſtractions in my Mind; and when length of Prattle had lull’d Towriſſa aſleep, I only refreſh’d my weary Spirits with weeping.
After two or three Days, the News arriv’d that Boſvil was ſick of a continu’d Fever, even ſo bad, that all deſpair’d of his Life. This was a new Stroke 062 I3v 62 Stroke of Fortune, and ſhe was arm’d with a Weapon, againſt which I had never contended; and at the ſame time was angry at my ſelf for grieving. Ah fooliſh Galeſia (said I to my ſelf) ah ſilly Girl, to grieve for him who deſerves thy Scorn, and Hatred, for him that has robb’d thee of thy Quiet three whole Years, for him that ſwore to love thee, that languiſh’d, and dy’d at thy Feet, expreſsly to make thee miſerable; for him that obſtructed the Amours of the firſt and ſecond Brafort, that thy Ruin might be the more compleat; for him that was treated by thy hoſpitable Parents, more like their own Child than an adventitious Gueſt, by which the Traitor had Opportunity to ſteal away the Heart of their only Daughter! and is it poſſible that thou ſhou’dſt grieve for ſuch a Wretch as this? one that Heaven has now mark’d with its juſt Vengeance, and has ſent this Sickneſs as a Scourge for his Falſhood. But not withſtanding all this, I muſt grieve and pray for him, which I am ſure I did with more Eagerneſs than ever I pray’d for my own Soul; in which I did but pay a Devotion which he had advanc’d, for he has often aſſur’d me, that he offer’dfer’d 063 I4r 63 fer’d me daily in his Prayers. The Conſideration of which holy Kindneſs made me redouble my Requeſt to Heaven to ſpare his Life; tho’ at the ſame time I had much rather he ſhou’d have dy’d, than not live mine: However, I did not pretend to capitulate with the Almighty, but ask’d his Life in general Terms, without including or excluding her Perſon, which by Intervals, I hop’d might yet one Day be mine; for I ſtill bubled my Fancy that he loved me, and that the Sight of me, after ſo long Abſence, was the genuin Cauſe of this his Illneſs, and then made wild Reſolutions to viſit him, fancied my ſelf there, figured to my ſelf the Tranſports of Joy he wou’d be in to ſee me ſo kind, imagin’d his Father and Mother, embracing me as their proper Child; then immediately drawing the Curtain, behold my ſelf rejected by them as the Plague of their Family, perhaps refus’d, and ſlighted by him, rebuk’d and wonder’d at for my coming, ſcorn’d and laugh’d at by all the World, ſeverely treated by my Parents, or perhaps out of hopes of ever ſeeing them again; for I very well believ’d there was no Medium after ſuch an Exploit, between being 064 I4v 64 being receiv’d by his Parents, and abandon’d by my own; and for me to have propos’d this Viſit to them, I knew was vain, having no Pretence to juſtify the Requeſt, the whole Amour having been one continu’d Act of Folly on the one ſide, and Treachery on the other; and the laſt Scene a Declaration of Scorn inſtead of Kindneſs; he having own’d in preſence of my Mother, and other Friends, his Deſign of marrying another. And then repeat in my Thoughts all his Crimes, and with my beſt Malice enlarge upon his Treachery, Falſhood, Cruelty, &c. look upon him Dead by the Hand of Heaven, juſt and good in taking him away, from a Poſſibility of accompliſhing his Perjury in his pretended Marriage; then in an inſtant, turn over the Leaf, and read him dead as my faithful Lover, recount all the tender Words and Actions that had paſs’d in our three Years Converſation; blame all my feign’d Indifference, and forc’d Coldneſs towards him; I fancy he thought on me in his Agony, and named me with his dying Breath; conceit I ſaw his much grieved Parents curſing me as the Author of their Affliction; and after a thouſand of 065 K1r 65 of theſe tragical Notions, which preſented themſelves to my diſtracted Imagination, my Fancy wou’d open another Scene, and make me think I ſaw him alive, and happy in the Arms of his London Miſtreſs, living in all the Felicities that a happy Eſpouſals cou’d procure. Thus my Thoughts play’d at Racket, and ſeldom minded the Line of Reaſon, my Mind labor’d under a perpetual ſhaking Palſy of Hope and Fear, my whole Interiour was nothing but Diſtraction and Uncertainty. At laſt I reſolved to ſend a Meſſenger ſecretly to ſee how he did, in which I did a vaſt Penance for all the proud Actions of my Life; for nothing cou’d be harder, than to be obliged to ſuch a Perſon, in making him the Confident of my Affection. However, at this time I did Violence to my Nature, and order’d one of my Father’s Men to go ſecretly on this Errand; but firſt I order’d him to go to my Couſin Boſvil’s own Dwelling, which was near us, and there enquire after his Health, and if there be heard of his being better, then to go no farther, otherwiſe, to go on his way to Boſvil’s Father’s House. The Man perform’d my Orders exactly, and K hearing 066 K1v 66 hearing at this Place that he was ſomewhat better, went no farther; with which I remain’d ſatisfy’d, till time brought him to our Houſe perfectly recover’d. But ah! this Recovery was a Death to all my Hopes, for the firſt Uſe he made of his new reſtor’d Health, was to go marry his Miſtreſs at London, making our Houſe in the way, and me the Auditor of that horrid News, which at firſt ſhock’d me; but I had been ſo often put upon by falſe Alarms, that I was now grown like the Country-men to the Shepherds in the Fable, who, when the Wolf really came, ſtir’d not, having been often deluded by the Shepherds, and call’d without Occaſion; for I thought it impoſſible that he cou’d come to tell me ſuch News to my Face. But what is moſt aſtonishing, I have been told ſince, that in his Sickneſs he gave all he had to me, and recommended me to his Parents as their proper Child; and they promis’d to receive me as ſuch. Now after all this, to go directly after his Sickneſs and be married to another, is a Tranſaction moſt unaccountable. However, I knew nothing of this at that time, for I was told it afterwards, and that he had been ex- 067 K2r 67 extreamly concern’d on my Account in this his Sickneſs. However, ignorant as I was of theſe Circumſtances, I did not in the leaſt believe, that his going to London (when he paſs’d by our Houſe) was to be married, but look’d upon it as a meer Jeſt or Banter, ſuch as was that of Mrs. Lowland and others; wherefore I cou’d not paſs over this Subject of Frolick or Mirth, without adding to the Jeſt; as I had ſent him a Willow-Garland upon the Marriage of his pretended Mrs. Lowland; ſo now I ſent him a pretty Pair of Horns, neatly made of Bugles, by which I meant to joke and banter him on this his pretended Marriage; but alas! it proved more than a Pretence, and the Horns came to him juſt upon his Wedding Day, in the Preſence of his Bride, and all the Gueſt; as alſo ſeveral roguiſh Emblems and Motto’s, the Horns being faſtned to a Head-band, as a moſt ſovereign Remedy for the Head-ach, to which marry’d Men are often very ſubject, eſpecially thoſe that are wedded to Coquets; and all which, I proteſt, was without the leaſt Deſign of Malice, of thinking in the leaſt, that he was really to be married, but thought I only render’dK2 der’d 068 K2v 68 der’d Jeſt for Jeſt, believing his Diſcourſe of Marriage had only been a Banter or Amuſement, ſuch as that of Mrs. Lowland, and the rest before-mention’d.
Now though all this came from an unknown Hand, no Queſtion but he believ’d it came from me; and by his Behaviour I concluded as much, for he always avoided my Preſence, and ſhun’d my Company as much as poſſible, almoſt to the Breach of common Civility; by which I fancied I was the Object of his Averſion, but a Confident of his aſſur’d me the contrary, and that Boſvil had told him, that Love had taken ſuch firm Root in his Soul, that in ſpight of all his Efforts, even Marriage it ſelf, he cou’d not eradicate it; and therefore avoided my Preſence, becauſe he cou’d not ſee me with Indifferency. Moreover, he told him what Conflicts he underwent during his Sickneſs; but at his Recovery, finding that I had taken no notice of him, he reſolved to ſhake off his Fetters, and abandon one who had never ſhew’d any Kindneſs to him, but treated him always with ſuch an Air of Indifference, as was rather the Effect of Prudence than Affection; and that he had invented that 069 K3r 69 that Story of Mrs. Lowland, to try if Jealouſie wou’d work upon me; but all my Conduct had been with ſo much Caution and Circumſpection, quite different from Paſſion or Tenderneſs, that he thought (with others) that all amorous Inclinations were bury’d with Brafort, and that he cou’d never hope farther than for a ſecond Place in my Affections. How far all this was ſincere or pretended, I know not, I rather think he made it a Handle for his own Falſhood; for Love is apt to interpret things in its own Favour; and Men believe Women to be forwarder than they really are, taking even Complaiſance and Civilities for Affection; but he thought fit to take hold of another Handle, the better to ſtifle his own Falſhood, and hide it from the ſight of my Friends, by laying the Blame on me. But to return; he was marry’d at London, and brought home his Bride. Now it was that I was forc’d to act the Part of Patient Grizell, and go with other Relations to bid her welcome, throw the Stocking, eat Sack-poſſet, and perform all the Farce of a wellpleas’d Kinſwoman; invite her to our Houſe, prepare Dinners and Treats for her, 070 K3v 70 her, and in all things ſeem eaſy and ſatisfy’d; all this I was conſtrain’d to do, or lay my Diſgrace open to all the World.
Thus, my Lucaſia, I have brought you to the Confines of my Story; how far I ſtand juſtify’d or condemn’d in your Thoughts, I know not, but I remember nothing in which I can accuſe my ſelf, even now that I am free from Paſſion, and capable to make a ſerious Reflection.
The only thing (reply’d Lucaſia) that I blame you for is, that you did not conſult your Mother, whoſe Wiſdom might have found out a way to have accommodated things to all your Satisfactions. Alas (anſwer’d Galeſia) I often reflected on that, but thought it his Buſineſs, or his Parents, to diſcover it to mine, and always expected ſuch an Addreſs; for if I had told my Father and Mother, I ſhou’d but have embaraſs’d them in a diſagreeable Buſineſs, for it ill befitted them to proffer their Daughter in Marriage; however, I now believe it the ſafeſt and moſt commendable way in any the like Caſe, and if I was to act the Part over again, I ſhou’d certainly proceed on that footing, and 071 K4r 71 and in ſo doing my Duty, find a good Event from the Hand of Providence; for I believe wiſer Heads than mine wou’d have been nonplus’d in a Caſe ſo Bizar, and found enough to do a paſs thro’ ſuch a Labyrinth as Boſvil’s ſubtle Turnings had compos’d. Thus I have impartially pointed out to you this unhappy Scene of my Life, which the Bell now ringing to Prayers ſhall put a Period to.
Books lately printed for E. Curll.
I T he Works of Mr. John Philips, conſiſting of the following Poems.
- 1 Bleinheim.
- 2 Cyder.
- 3 The Splendid Shilling, in Imitation of Milton.
- 4 An Ode on Tobacco, to my Lord Bolingbroke, &c. To which is prefix’d his Life and Character.
Price 1 s. 6d.
II Obſervations upon Mr. Addiſon’s Cato; wherein the whole Plan, and ſome Paſſages in that Tragedy are explain’d and illuſtrated, with the Character of Cato impartially repreſented; alſo a Compariſon between Cato and Caſar. By Mr. Steele. The Second Edition. Done in Quarto, to bind up with the Play. Price 6d.
III Sacred Miſcellanies: Or, Divine Poems upon ſeveral Subjects, never before printed, viz.
- 1 An Ode on Divine Vengeance. By Mr. Webſter. Inſcrib’d to Mr. Steele.
- 2 On the Laſt Judgment, and Happineſs of the Saints in Heaven. By N. Rowe, Esq;
- 3 Select Psalms paraphras’d. By Mr. Sewell, Mr. Watts, Mr. Broome of St. John’s College, Cambridge, &c.
IV The Stage, a Poem; wherein its Riſe, Progreſs, and Improvement are conſider’d; with Characters of the moſt Eminent Dramatick Poets and Players. By Mr. Webſter, of Christ-Church, Oxon. Inscrib’d to Joſeph Addiſon, Eſq; 8 vo. Price 6d.