Written by the
Thrice Noble, Illustrious
Excellent Princess, The
Lady Marchioness

A winged figure blowing a trumpet, standing on top of a bell. The banner behind her reads obscuredVeneranda Bones

Printed by A. Warren, for John Martyn, James
, and Tho.Thomas Dicas, at the Bell in
Saint Pauls Church Yard
, 16621662.

A1v A2r


To those that do delight in Scenes and wit,

I dedicate my Book, for those I writ;

Next to my own Delight, for I did take

Much pleasure and delight these Playes to make;

For all the time my Playes a making were,

My brain the Stage, my thoughts were acting there.

A2 The A2v A3r

The Epistle

My Lord,

My resolution was, that when I had done writing, to have
dedicated all my works in gross to your Lordship;
and I did verily believe that this would have been
my last work: but I find it will not, unless I dye before
I have writ my other intended piece. And as for
this Book of Playes, I believe I should never have writ them, nor
have had the Capacity nor Ingenuity to have writ Playes, had not you
read to me some Playes which your Lordship had writ, and lye by for
a good time to be Acted, wherein your Wit did Create a desire in my
Mind to write Playes also, although my Playes are very unlike
those you have writ, for your Lordships Playes have as it were
a natural life, and a quick spirit in them, whereas mine are like dull
dead statues, which is the reason I send them forth to be printed, rather
than keep them concealed in hopes to have them first Acted; and this
advantage I have, that is, I am out of the fear of having them hissed
off from the Stage, for they are not like to come thereon; but were they
such as might deserve applause, yet if Envy did make a faction
against them, they would have had a publick Condemnation; and though
I am not such a Coward, as to be affraid of the hissing Serpents, or A3 stinged A3v
stinged Tongues of Envy, yet it would have made me a little Melancholy
to have my harmless and innocent Playes go weeping from the
Stage, and whipt by malicious and hard-hearted censurers; but the
truth is, I am careless, for so I have your applause I desire no more,
for your Lordships approvement is a sufficient satisfaction to me

My Lord,
Your Lordships honest Wife,
and faithfull Servant,

M.N.Margaret Newcastle

To facing A3v

To The

Noble Readers,

I Must ask pardon, for that I said I should not trouble you with more of my works
than this Book of Playes; but since I have considered with my self, there is
one work more, which is very fit for me to do, although I shall not be able to do it
so well as the subject will deserve, being the Life of my Noble Lord; but that work
will require some time in the gathering together some several passages; for although
I mean not to write of all the particulars of these times, yet forasmuch as is concerning
that subject I shall write of, it will be requirable; but it is a work that will move
so slowly, as perchance I shall not live to finish it; but howsoever, I will imploy my time
about it, and it will be a satisfaction to my life that I indeavour it.

M.N.Margaret Newcastle

To facing A4r

To the

Noble Readers,

The reason why I put out my Playes in print, before they are Acted, is, first, that
I know not when they will be Acted, by reason they are in English, and England
doth not permit I will not say of Wit, yet not of Playes; and if
they should, yet by reason all those that have been bred and brought up to Act, are
dead, or dispersed, and it would be an Act of some time, not only to breed and teach
some Youths to Act, but it will require some time to prove whether they be good
Actors or no; for if they are not bred to it whilst they be young, they will never be
good Actors when they are grown up to be men; for although some one by chance
may have naturally, a facility to Action, and a Volubility of Speech, and a good
memory to learn, and get the Parts by heart, or wrote yet it is very unlikely, or indeed
impossible, to get a whole Company of good Asctors without being taught and brought
up thereto; the other reason is, that most of my Playes would seem tedious upon the
Stage, by reason they are somewhat long, although most are divided into first and second
Parts; for having much variety in them, I could not possibly make them shorter,
and being long, it might tire the Spectators, who are forced, or bound by the rules of
Civility to sit out a Play, if they be not sick; for to go away before a Play is ended, is
a kind of an affront, both to the Poet and the Players; yet, I believe none of my Playes
are so long as Ben.Benjamin Johnson’s Fox, or Alchymist, which in truth, are somewhat too
long; but for the Readers, the length of the Playes can be no trouble, nor inconveniency,
because they may read as short or as long a time as they please, without any
disrespect to the Writer; but some of my Playes are short enough; but the printing of
my Playes spoils them for ever to be Acted; for what men are acquainted with, is
despised, at lest neglected; for the newness of Playes, most commonly, takes the Spectators,
more than the Wit, Scenes, or Plot, so that my Playes would seem lame or tired
in action, and dull to hearing on the Stage, for which reason, I shall never desire
they should be Acted; but if they delight or please the Readers, I shall have as much
satisfaction as if I had the hands of applause from the Spectators.

M.N.Margaret Newcastle

To A4r

To The

Noble Readers,

Although I expect my Playes will be found fault with, by reason I have not
drawn the several persons presented in a Circular line, or to a Trianglar
point, making all the Actors to meet at the latter end upon the Stage in a
flock together; likewise, that I have not made my Comedies of one dayes actions or
passages; yet I have adventured to publish them to the World: But to plead in my
Playes behalf, first, I do not perceive any reason why that the several persons presented
should be all of an acquaintance, or that there is a necessity to have them of one
Fraternity, or to have a relation to each other, or linck’d in alliance as one Family;
when as Playes are to present the general Follies, Vanities, Vices, Humours, Dispositions,
Passions, Affections, Fashions, Customs, Manners, and practices of the whole
World of Mankind, as in several persons; also particular Follies, Vanities, Vices,
Humours, Passions, Affections, Fashions, Customs, Fortunes, and the like, in
particular persons; also the Sympathy and Antipathy of Dispositions, Humours,
Passions, Customs, and Fashions of several persons; also the particular Virtues and
Graces in several persons, and several Virtues and Graces in particular persons,
and all these Varieties to be drawn at the latter end into one piece, as into one Company,
which in my opinion shews neither Usual, Probable, nor Natural. For since the
World is wide and populated, and their various actions dispersed, and spread about
by each particular, and Playes are to present them severally, I perceive no reason
they should force them together in the last Act, as in one Community, bringing them
in as I may say by Head and Shoulders, making the persons of each Humour, good
Fortunes, Misfortunes, Nations and Ages, to have relations to each other; but in
this I have not followed the steps of precedent Poets, for in my opinion, I think it as
well, if not better, if a Play ends but with two persons, or one person upon the Stage;
besides, I would have my Playes to be like the Natural course of all things in the
World, as some dye sooner, some live longer, and some are newly born, when some
are newly dead, and not all to continue to the last day of Judgment; so my Scenes,
some last longer than other some, and some are ended when others are begun; likewise
some of my Scenes have no acquaintance or relation to the rest of the Scenes,
although in one and the same Play, which is the reason many of my Playes will not
end as other Playes do, especially Comedies, for in Tragi-Comedies I think Poets do
not alwayes make all lye bleeding together; but I think for the most part they do
but the want of this swarm in the last Act and Scene, may make my Playes seem dull
and vacant, but I love ease so well, as I hate constraint even in my works; for I had
rather have a dull easy life, than be forced to active gayeties, so I had rather my
Playes should end dully than unnecessarily be forced into one Company, but some of
my Playes are gathered into one sheaf or bundel in the latter end. Likewise my Playes A4 may A4v
may be Condemned, because they follow not the Antient Custome, as the learned sayes,
which is, that all Comedies should be so ordered and composed, as nothing should be
presented therein, but what may be naturally, or usually practiced or Acted in the
World in the compass of one day; truly in my opinion those Comedies would be very
flat and dull, and neither profitable nor pleasant, that should only present the actions
of one day; for though Ben.Benjamin Johnson as I have heard was of that opinion, that a
Comedy cannot be good, nor is a natural or true Comedy, if it should present more
than one dayes action, yet his Comedies that he hath published, could never be the
actions of one day; for could any rational person think that the whole Play of the
Fox could be the action of one day? or can any rational person think that the Alchymist
could be the action of one day? as that so many several Cozenings could be Acted in
one day, by Captain Face and Doll Common; and could the Alchymist make any
believe they could make gold in one day? could they burn so many Coals, and draw
the purses of so many, or so often from one person, in one day? and the like is in all
his Playes, not any of them presents the actions of one day, although it were a day at
the Poles, but of many days, nay I may say some years. But to my reason, I do not
perceive a necessity that Comedies should be so closely packt or thrust up together; for
if Comedies are either to delight, or to profit, or to both, they must follow no other rule
or example, but to put them into Scenes and Acts, and to order their several discources
in a Comedy, so as Physicians do their Cordials, wherein they mix many several
Ingrediences together into one Electuary, as sharp, bitter, salt, and sweet, and
mix them so, as they are both pleasing to the Tast, and comfortable to the Stomach;
so Poets should order the several Humours, Passions, Customs, Manners, Fashions,
and practice of Mankind, as to intermix them so, as to be both delightfull to the
Mind and Senses, and profitable to the Life; also Poets should do as Physicians or
Apothecaries, which put not only several sorts, but several kinds of Drugs into one
Medicine, as Minerals and Vegetables together, which are very different; also
they will mix several Druggs and Simples out of several Climates and Countries,
gathered out from all the parts of the World, and upon occasion they will mix new and
old Simples together, although of one and the same sort and kind; so Poets both in
their Comedies and Tragedies, must, or at leastwise may, represent several Nations,
Governments, People, Customs, Fashions, Manners, Natures, Fortunes, Accidents,
Actions, in one Play; as also several times of Ages to one person if occasion requires,
as from Childhood to Manhood in one Play; for Poets are to describe in Playes
the several Ages, Times, Actions, Fortunes, Accidents, and Humours in Nature,
and the several Customs, Manners, Fashions, and Speeches of men: thus Playes are
to present the natural dispositions and practices of Mankind; also they are to point
at Vanity, laugh at Follies, disgrace Baseness, and persecute Vice; likewise they are
to extol Virtue, and to honour Merit, and to praise the Graces, all which makes a
Poet Divine, their works edifying to the Mind or Soul, profitable to the Life,
delightfull to the Senses, and recreative to Time; but Poets are like Preachers,
some are more learned than others, and some are better Orators than others, yet
from the worst there may be some good gained by them, and I do not despair, although
but a Poetress, but that my works may be some wayes or other serviceable to my
Readers, which if they be, my time in writing them is not lost, nor my Muse

M.NMargaret Newcastle

To facing A4v

To the

Noble Readers,

I Cannot chuse but mention an erronious opinion got into this our Modern time
and men, which is, that it should be thought a crime or debasement for the nobler
sort to Act Playes, especially on publick Theatres, although the Romans
were of another opinion, for not only the noble youth did Act in publick, but some of
the Emperours themselves; though I do not commend it in the Emperours, who should
spend their times in realities, and not in feigning; yet certainly it was commendable
in the noblest youths, who did practice what ought to be followed or shunn’d: for
certainly there is no place, wayes or means, so edifying to Youth as publick Theatres,
not only to be Spectators but Actors; for it learns them gracefull behaviours and
demeanors; it puts Spirit and Life into them, it teaches them Wit, and makes their
Speech both voluble and tunable, besides, it gives them Confidence, all which
ought every man to have, that is of quality. But some will say if it would work such
effects, why are not mercenary Players benefited so thereby? I answer, that they only
Act for the lucre of Gain, and not for the grace of Behaviour, the sweetness of Speech,
nor the increasing of Wit, so as they only Act as Parrots speak, by wrote, and not
as Learning gives to Education; for they making not a benefit of the wit, but only by
the wit receive it; not neither into their consideration, understanding, nor delight,
for they make it a work of labour, and not of delight, or pleasure, or honour; for they
receive it into the memory, and no farther than for to deliver it out, as Servants or
Factors to sell, and not keep it as purchasors to their own use; that is the reason that
as soon as the Play is done, their wit and becoming graces are at an end, whereas the
nobler sort, that Act not for mercenary Profit, but for Honour, and becoming, would
not only strive to Act well upon the Stage, but to practise their actions when off from
the Stage; besisdes, it would keep the youths from misimploying time with their foolish
extravagancies, deboist luxuries, and base Vices, all which Idleness and vacant
time produceth; and in my opinion, a publick Theatre were a shorter way of education
than their tedious and expensive Travels, or their dull and solitary Studies; for
Poets teach them more in one Play, both of the Nature of the World and Mankind,
by which they learn not only to know other men, but their own selves, than they can
learn in any School, or in any Country or Kingdome in a year; but to conclude, a
Poet is the best Tutor, and a Theatre is the best School that is for Youth to be educated
by or in.

M.N.Margaret Newcastle

To facing A5r

To The

Noble Readers,

I know there are many Scholastical and Pedantical persons that will condemn my
writings, because I do not keep strictly to the Masculine and Feminine Genders,
as they call them: as for example, a Lock and a Key, the one is the Masculine
Gender, the other the Feminine Gender, so Love is the Masculine Gender, Hate
the Feminine Gender, and the Furies are shees, and the Graces are shees, the Virtues
are shees, and the seven deadly Sins are shees, which I am sorry for; but I
know no reason but that I may as well make them Hees for my use, as others did Shees,
or Shees as others did Hees. But some will say, if I did do so, there would be no
forms or rules of Speech to be understood by; I answer, that we may as well understand
the meaning or sense of a Speaker or Writer by the names of Love or Hate, as
by the names of he or she, and better: for the division of Masculine and Feminine
Genders doth confound a Scholar more and takes up more time to learn them, than
they have time to spend; besides, where one doth rightly understand the difference,
a hundred, nay a thousand do not, and yet they are understood, and to be understood,
is the end of all Speakers and Writers; so that if my writings be understood, I desire
no more; and as for the nicities of Rules, Forms, and Terms, I renounce, and profess,
that if I did understand and know them strictly, as I do not, I would not follow
them: and if any dislike my writings for want of those Rules, Forms, and Terms,
let them not read them; for I had rather my writings should be unread than be read
by such Pedantical Scholastical persons.

M.N.Margaret Newcastle

To A5r

To The

Noble Readers,

Tis likely you will condemn my Playes as being dull and flat, by reason they
have not the high seasoning of Poetical Salt; but Suger is more commonly
used amongst our Sex than Salt. But I fear my Wit is tastless, which I am
sorry for; for though a Satyrical Speaker is discommendable, being for the most part
abusive; for Bitter reproofs only are fit for rigid Pedants, Censuring and backbiting
fit for pot Companions, and sharp replies is a wit for mean persons, being in
a degree of scolding; A Ralery Wit, for Buffons and Jesters which abuse under
the Veil of Mirth, Familiarity, and Freedome; whereas a generous discoursitive
Wit, although it be free, yet it is sweet and pleasing: thus as I said Satyrical
Speakers are discommendable, yet Satyrical Writers are highly to be praised, as most
profitable, because those reprove only the generality, as the general Vices, Follies,
and errors of Mankind, pointing at no particular; and the sharpest Writers
are most commonly the sweetest Speakers. But I have observed one general
Folly amongst many which is, that it is expected by most Readers that the Writers
should speak as they write, which would be very ridiculous; as for example,
a Lyrick Poet should speak nothing but Sonnets, a Comedian or Tragedian Poet
should speak nothing but set Speeches, or blanck Verse, or such Speeches which
are only proper to present such and such humours, which in ordinary discourse would
be improper; and though Virgil whose greatest praise is Language, yet I do verily believe
he did not speak in his ordinary Conversation in such a stile, forms and Speeches,
nor in such high, fine, and choice Latin nor in such high and lofty expressions,
nor apt similitudes, nor the sence of his discourse wrapt in such Metaphors, as in his
writings, nay Eloquent Speakers or Orators do not alwayes speak Orations, but upon
an occasion, and at set times, but their ordinary Conversation is with ordinary discourses;
for I do verily believe, the greatest and most Eloquents Orators that ever
were in the World, in their ordinary Conversation, converst and spoke but as other
men. Besides, in Common and ordinary Conversations, the most Wittiest, Learnedst,
and Eloquentest Men, are forced to speak according to the Wit, Learning, Language,
and Capacities of those they are in Company and Conversation with, unless they will
speak all themselves, which will be no Conversation: for in Conversation every particular
person must have his turn and time of speaking as well as hearing; yet such
is the folly of the World, as to despise the Authors of Witty, Learned and Eloquent
Writings, if their Conversations be as other mens, and yet would laugh at them, or
account them mad, if they should speak otherwise, as out of this ordinary way; but the
greatest talkers are not the best writers, which is the cause women cannot be good
Writers; for we for fear of being thought Fools, make our selves Fools, in striving
to expres some Wit, whereas if we had but that power over our selves as to keep A5 silenne A5v
silence, we perchance might be thought Wits, although we were Fools, but to keep silence
is impossible for us to do, so long as we have Speech, we will talk, although to
no purpose, for nothing but Death can force us to silence, for we often talk in our
Sleep; but to speak without partiality, I do not perceive that men are free from this
imperfection, nor from condemning us, although they are guilty of the same fault;
but we have this advantage of men, which is, that we know this imperfection in our
selves, although we do not indeavour to mend it; but men are so Partial to themselves,
as not to perceive this imperfection in themselves, and so they cannot mend
it; but in this, will not or cannot is as one; but this discourse hath brought me to
this, that if I have spoke at any time to any person or persons impertinently, improperly,
untimely, or tediously, I ask their pardon: but lest I should be impertinently tedious
in this Epistle, and so commit a fault in asking pardon, I leave my Readers to
what may be more pleasing to them.

M.N.Margaret Newcastle

To facing A5v

To The

Noble Readers,

I Make no question but my Playes will be censured, and those Censurors severe,
but I hope not malicious; but they will perchance say that my Playes are too serious,
by reason there is no ridiculous Jest in them, nor wanton Love, nor Impossibilities;
also ’tis likely they will say that there are no plots, nor designs, nor subtil
Contrivances, and the like; I answer, that the chief Plots of my Playes were to imploy
my idle time, the designs to please and entertain my Readers, and the contrivance was
to join edifying Profit and Delight together, that my Readers may neither lose their
time, nor grow weary in the reading; but if they find my Playes neither Edifying,
nor Delightfull, I shall be sorry; but if they find either, I shall be pleased, and if
they find both, I shall much rejoyce, that my time hath been imployed to some
good use.

M.N.Margaret Newcastle

To facing A6r

To The

Worthy Readers,

I Have heard that such Poets that write Playes, seldome or never join or sow
the several Scenes together; they are two several Professions, at least not usual
for rare Poets to take that pains; like as great Taylors, the Master only cuts out
and shapes, and his Journy men and Apprentices join and sow them together; but
I like as a poor Taylor was forced to do all my self, as to cut out, shape, join, and sow
each several Scene together, without any help or direction; wherefore I fear they are
not so well done but that there will be many faults found; but howsoever, I did my
best indeavour, and took great pains in the ordering and joining thereof, for which
I hope my Learned Readers will pardon the errors therein, and excuse me the worker

M.N.Margaret Newcastle

To A6r

To The

Noble Readers,

My Lord was pleased to illustrate my Playes with some Scenes of his own Wit,
to which I have set his name, that my Readers may know which are his, as
not to couzen them, in thinking they are mine; also Songs, to which my
Lords name is set; for I being no Lyrick Poet, my Lord supplied that defect of my
Brain with the superfluity of his own Brain; thus our Wits join as in Matrimony,
my Lords the Masculine, mine the Feminine Wit, which is no small glory to me,
that we are Married, Souls, Bodies, and Brains, which is a treble marriage, united
in one Love, which I hope is not in the power of Death to dissolve; for Souls may
love, and Wit may live, though Bodies dye.

M.N.Margaret Newcastle

A6 To A6v

I Must trouble my Noble Readers to write of one thing
more, which is concerning the Reading of Playes; for
Playes must be read to the nature of thosse several humours,
or passions, as are exprest by Writing: for they must not read a
Scene as they would read a Chapter; for Scenes must be read
as if they were spoke or Acted. Indeed Comedies should be
read a Mimick way, and the sound of their Voice must be according
to the sense of the Scene; and as for Tragedies, or
Tragick Scenes, they must not be read in a pueling whining
Voice, but a sad serious Voice, as deploring or complaining:
but the truth is there are as few good Readers as good Writers;
indeed an ill Reader is, as great a disadvantage to wit
as wit can have, unless it be ill Acted, for then it ’tis doubly
disgraced, both in the Voice and Action, whereas in Reading
only the voice is imployed; but when a Play is well and
skillfully read, the very sound of the Voice that enters through
the Ears, doth present the Actions to the Eyes of the Fancy
as lively as if it were really Acted; but howsoever Writings
must take their Chance, and I leave my Playes to Chance and
Fortune, as well as to Censure and Reading.

M.N.Margaret Newcastle

To facing A6v

To the Lady Marchioness of Newcastle
upon her Playes.

Terence and Plautus Wits we now do scorn,

Their Comick Socks worn out, in pieces torn,

Only their rags of Wit remain as toyes

For Pedants to admire, to teach School Boyes;

It is not time hath wasted all their Fame,

But your high Phancies, and your nobler flame,

Which burnt theirs up, in their own ashes lies,

Nor Phœnix like e’r out of those will rise;

Old Tragick Buskins now are thrown away,

When we read your each Passion in each Play,

No stupid block or stony heart forbears

To drown their Cheeks in Seas of salter Tears;

Such power you have in Tragick, Comick stile,

When for to fetch a tear or make a smile,

Still at your pleasure all our passions ly

Obedient to your pen, to laugh or cry;

So even with the thread of Natures fashion,

As you play on her heart-strings still of passion;

So we are all your Subjects in each Play,

Unwilling willingly still to obey;

Or have a thought but what you make or draw

Us by the power of your wits great law;

Thus Emperess in Soveraign power yours sits

Over the wise, and tames Poetick wits.

W.William Newcastle

facing A7r A7r

A General Prologue to all my Playes.

Noble Spectators, do not think to see

Such Playes, that’s like Ben.Benjamin Johnsons Alchymie,

Nor Fox, nor Silent Woman: for those Playes

Did crown the Author with exceeding praise;

They were his Master-pieces, and were wrought

By Wits Invention, and his labouring thought,

And his Experience brought Materials store,

His reading several Authors brought much more:

What length of time he took those Plays to write,

I cannot guess, not knowing his Wits flight;

But I have heard, Ben.Benjamin Johnsons Playes came forth,

To the Worlds view, as things of a great worth;

Like Forein Emperors, which do appear

Unto their Subjects, not ’bove once a year;

So did Ben.Benjamin Johnsons Playes so rarely pass,

As one might think they long a writing was.

But my poor Playes, like to a common rout,

Gathers in throngs, and heedlesly runs out,

Like witless Fools, or like to Girls and Boyes,

Goe out to shew new Clothes, or such like toyes:

This shews my Playes have not such store of wit,

Nor subtil plots, they were so quickly writ,

So quickly writ, that I did almost cry

For want of work, my time for to imploy:

Sometime for want of work, I’m forc’d to play,

And idlely to cast my time away:

Like as poor Labourers, all they desire,

Is, to have so much work, it might them tire:

Such difference betwixt each several brain,

Some labour hard, and offer life to gain;

Some lazie lye, and pampred are with ease,

And some industrious are, the World to please:

Some are so quick, their thoughts do move so fast,

They never stay to mold, or to forecast:

Some take great pains to get, and yet are poor,

And some will steal, for to increase their store:

Some brains know not what Subjects for to chuse,

And with considering, they their wit do lose:

Some only in designs do spend their time,

And some without designs do only rhime;

A7 And A7v

And some do take more pains a Plot to lay,

Than other some to plot, and write a Play.

As for Ben.Benjamin Johnsons brain, it was so strong,

He could conceive, or judge, what’s right, what’s wrong:

His language plain, significant and free,

And in the English Tongue, the Masterie:

Yet Gentle Shakespear had a fluent Wit,

Although less Learning, yet full well he writ;

For all his Playes were writ by Natures light,

Which gives his Readers, and Spectators sight.

But Noble Readers, do not think my Playes,

Are such as have been writ in former daies;

As Johnson, Shakespear, Beamont, Fletcher writ;

Mine want their Learning, Reading, Language, Wit:

The Latin phrases I could never tell,

But Johnson could, which made him write so well.

Greek, Latin Poets, I could never read,

Nor their Historians, but our English Speed;

I could not steal their Wit, nor Plots out take;

All my Playes Plots, my own poor brain did make:

From Plutarchs story I ne’r took a Plot,

Nor from Romances, nor from Don Quixot,

As others have, for to assist their Wit,

But I upon my own Foundation writ;

Like those that have a little patch of Land,

Even so much whereon a house may stand:

The Owner builds a house, though of no shew,

A Cottage warm and clean, though thatch’d and low;

Vitruvius Art and Skill he doth not take,

For to design, and so his house to make;

Nor Carpenters, nor Masons doth not hire,

But builds a house himself, whole and intire:

Materials none from forein parts are brought;

Nor hath he Stone and Timber with art wrought;

But some sound Tree, which on his ground did grow,

Which he cuts down with many a labouring blow;

And with his hatchet, and his saw, he cuts

His Tree in many parts, those parts he puts

In several places, beams, posts, planchers layes,

And thus a house with his own stock doth raise

He steals nor borrows not of any Neighbour,

But lives contentedly of his own labour;

And by his labour, he may thrive, and live

To be an old rich man, and then may leave

His Wealth, to build a Monument of Fame,

Which may for ever keep alive his name.

Just so, I hope, the works that I have writ,

Which are the buildings of my natural wit;

My own Inheritance, as Natures child,

But the Worlds Vanities would me beguild:

But I have thriftly been, houswiv’d my time,

And built both Cottages of Prose and Rhime;

All A8r

All the materials in my head did grow,

All is my own, and nothing do I owe:

But all that I desire when as I dye,

My memory in my own Works may lye:

And when as others build them Marble Tombs,

To inurn their dust, and fretted vaulted Rooms,

I care not where my dust, or bones remain,

So my Works live, the labour of my brain.

I covet not a stately, cut, carv’d Tomb,

But that my Works, in Fames house may have room:

Thus I my poor built Cottage am content,

When that I dye, may be my Monument.

facing A8r B1r


Enter 3. Gentlemen.

1. Gentleman

Come Tom will you goe to a play?

2. Gentleman


1. Gentleman


2. Gentleman

Because there is so many words, and so little
wit, as the words tire me more than the wit delights me; and
most commonly there is but one good part or humour, and all
the rest are forced in for to enterline that part, or humour;
Likewise not above one or two good Actors, the rest are as ill Actors as the
parts they Act, besides their best and principle part or humour is so tedious,
that I hate at last what I liked at first, for many times a part is very good to the
third Act, but continued to the fifth is stark naught.

1. Gentleman

The truth is, that in some Playes the Poets runs so long in one
humour, as he runs himself out of breath.

3. Gentleman

Not only the Poet but the humour he writes of seems to be
as broken-winded.

1. Gentleman

I have heard of a broken-winded Horse, but never heard of a
broken-winded Poet, nor of a broken-winded Play before.

3. Gentleman

I wonder why Poets will bind themselves, so as to make
every humour they write or present, to run quite through their Play.

2. Gentleman

Bind say you? they rather give themselves line and liberty,
nay they are so far from binding, as for the most part they stretch the Line of a
humour into pieces.

3. Gentleman

Let me tell you, that if any man should write a Play wherein
he should present an humour in one Act, and should not continue it to the end:
although it must be stretched, as you say, to make it hold out, he would be conemned,
and not only accounted an ill Poet, but no Poet, for it would be accounted
as ill as wanting a Rhime in a Copie of Verses, or a word too short, or
too much in a number, for which a Poet is condemned, and for a word that is
not spell’d right, he is damned for ever.

1. Gentleman

Nay, he is only damned if he doth not write strictly to the Orthographie.

3. Gentleman

Scholars only damne Writers and Poets for Orthographie,
but for the others, they are damned by the generality: that is, not only all readers,
but all that are but hearers of the works.

1. Gentleman

The generality for the most part is not foolishly strict, or
rigid as particulars are.

3. Gentleman

Yes faith, they are led by one Bell-weather like a company
of silly Sheep.

B 1. Gent. B1v 2

1. Gentleman

Well, if I were to write a Play, I would write the length of
a humour according to the strength of the humour and breadth of my wit. Let
them judge me and condemn as they would; for though some of the past, and
present ages be erroniously or malitiously foolish in such cases; yet the future
Ages may be more wise, and better natur’d as to applaud what the others
have condemned.

But prithy Tom let us goe.

2. Gentleman

No, I will not goe for the reasons before mentioned, which
is, they tire me with their empty words, dull speeches, long parts, tedious
Acts, ill Actors; and the truth is, theres not enough variety in an old play to
please me.

1. Gentleman

There is variety of that which is bad, as you have divided it,
But it seemes you love youth and variety in playes, as you doe in Mistresses.

3. Gentleman

Playes delights Amorous men as much as a Mistris doth.

1. Gentleman

Nay, faith more, for a man and his Mistris is soon out of
breath in their discourse, and then they know not what to say, and when they
are at a Non-pluss, they would be glad to be quit of each other, yet are ashamed
to part so soon, and are weary to stay with each other long, when a Play
entertaines them with Love, and requires not their answers, nor forceth their
braines, nor pumps their wits, for a Play doth rather fill them than empty them.

2. Gentleman

Faith most Playes doth rather fill the spectators with wind,
than with substance, with noise, than with newes;

1. Gentleman

This Play that I would have you go to, is a new Play.

2. Gentleman

But is there newes in the Play, that is (is there new wit,
fancyes, or new Scenes) and not taken out of old storyes, or old Playes newly

1. Gentleman

I know not that, but this Play was writ by a Lady, who on
my Conscience hath neither Language, nor Learning, but what is native and

2. Gentleman

A woman write a Play!
Out upon it, out upon it, for it cannot be good, besides you say she is a
Lady, which is the likelyer to make the Play worse, a woman and a Lady to
write a Play; fye, fye.

3. Gentleman

Why may not a Lady write a good Play?

2. Gentleman

No, for a womans wit is too weak and too conceited to
write a Play.

1. Gentleman

But if a woman hath wit, or can write a good Play, what
will you say then.

2. Gentleman

Why, I will say no body will believe it, for if it be good,
they will think she did not write it, or at least say she did not, besides the very
being a woman condemnes it, were it never so excellent and rare, for men
will not allow women to have wit, or we men to have reason, for it we allow
them wit, we shall lose our prehemency.

1. Gentleman

If you will not goe Tom, farewell; for I will go see this
Play, let it be good, or bad.

2. Gentleman

Nay, stay, I will go with thee, for I am contented to cast away
so much time for the sake of the sex. Although I have no faith of the Authresses

3. Gentleman

Many a reprobate hath been converted and brought to repentance
by hearing a good Sermon, and who knowes but that you may be
converted from your erroneous opinion; by seeing this Play, and brought to
confesse that a Lady may have wit.


Loves Adventures

The Several Wits

Youths Glory, and Deaths Banquet

The Lady Contemplation, Parts 1 and 2

Wit’s Cabal, Parts 1 and 2

The Unnatural Tragedie

The Publick Wooing

The Matrimonial Trouble, Parts 1 and 2

Nature’s Three Daughters, Beauty, Love and Wit, Parts 1 and 2

The Religious

The Comical Hash

Bell in Campo, Parts 1 and 2

The Apocriphal Ladies

The Female Academy


To The

Noble Readers,

Isaid in the beginning of this Book of Playes, in one of my Epistles, that I should
not trouble you with any more of my Works, unless one, which was a History of the
Life of my Noble Lord; but since this Book of Playes was not only writ, but
pack’d up, ready to send into England to be Printed, I by chance have entred into
another Work, like those that travel and know not where to go, wander about, and
at last light upon a path-way that leads them to some Village; so I wanting some Informations
from those that could truly, and would faithfully inform me of such
actions and passages as were to be inscribed in my History, so as I could not go so readily
on with that work, I was forced to sit idle, as having no work to do, which
troubled me much, not knowing what to write of: for though I am lazie, and unactive
to any other Imployments, and had rather sit still, and do nothing, than have my
thoughts obstructed, or disturbed from their usual Contemplations, with noise, or company,
or any other Action or Imployment, but writing; for writing is as pencilling
thoughts, and I take as much delight as Painters, which draw men, and other creatures;
So I, to draw my fancies opinions and conceptions upon white Paper, with
Pen and Ink, words being the figures of thoughts, and letters of words; but writing
is but the figuring of the figure, and Writers are but Copyers: But after some idle
time, at last I fell upon a vein of writing Letters, and so fast did the vein run at
first, as in one Fortnight I writ above threescore Letters, but I find it begins to
flag, like one that hath been let much bloud formerly, it may gush, or stream full out
at the opening of a vein, but cannot bleed long, they will faint for want of bloud,
or spirit, having let out much bloud formerly; so is it in my writing; for though I
desire to make them up a hundred, yet I believe I shall not go much further, finding
my spirits of Fancy grow weak, and dull, and the vein of Wit empty, having lately
writ 21 Playes, with 12 Epistles; and one Introduction, besides Prologues, and Epilogues.
My Readers may say this is an Inventory, or a bill of Fare; no, it is to let
them understand my Wit is drawn dry: for though Histories of Truth need not the
flourish of Wit, and no fancy ought to be inscrib’d therein; yet all such Writers,
which are rather to get Fame by Feigning, than to divulge Truth by Explaining,
should be attended with Wit, and drest with Fancy. But these Letters I mention, I
thought to joyn them to this Book of Playes, believing there would not be so many of
them, as to be in Folio by themselves; but fearing I should surfeit my Readers
with too great a Volume, I have altered that intention, and will rather chuse to present
them one Book at a time, like those that entertain with one dish of meat, to whet
their Appetites, than to present more to cloy their Gusto. But it may be some will
say there is enough of my Playes, to surfeit, as being not delicious, and choyce food
for the mind, as pleasant and profitable reading: My advice is, that they may taste, and Iiiiiiii3v
and feed of one Play, and if they find it unpleasant, or hard of digestion, let them
feed of no more, but let them feed of other Poetical Dishes, drest by other Poetical
Cooks, that may better please them; for as French Cooks are accounted the best for
corporal meats, so the Greeks and Latins for poetical Meats; but I am neither a Greek
nor a Latin Cook; I cannot dress, or cook after the Fashions or Phancies; I never was
bound Apprentice to Learning, I am as ignorant of their Arts and Meats, as of
their Persons and Nations; I am like a plain, cleanly English Cook-maid, that
dresses Meat rather wholsomely than luxuriously, a roast Capon without lard, a shoulder
of Mutton with a sawce of Capers and Olives, a piece of boyld Beef and Turnips,
and for desert, a plain Apple-tart, or a Pear-pye; ’Tis true, on Feastival
daies I have dressed Olioes, and Bisks, but neither after the French, Italian, nor
Spanish way, but a compound of my own dressing, that might please home-bred Persons,
although not Great, or Forein Travellers, as great Scholars, or learned Men;
neither have I Cookery to please queasie Appetites: I have only this to say for my
self, I am more industrious than expensive, more cleanly than curious; and if you
do not like, nor approve of my service, I will not expect much praise for my Wages:
You may turn me away, which is, to put my Works out of your Studies. I only
desire I may not depart with your displeasures, but as an honest, poor Servant, that
rather wanted Art and Skill in my Works, than Will, or Indeavour to make, or
dresse them to every Palate.

And so Farewell.


  • In the Epistle Dedicatory l. 1. blot out that.
  • In the 2 Epistle to the Reader l. 3. for permit read
  • Pag.Page 5. Scene 1. l. ult.ultimatus for sent read send.
  • S. 2. l. 1. to servant prefix your.
  • p. 8. l. 26. for
    solus r.read sola.
  • p. 9. l. 1. for as r.readat.
  • l. 19. For offers to go fotrth r.readoffers not to go forth.
  • p. 12. l. 17. for
    for virtue r.read virtuous.
  • p. 19. l. 16. for corn r.readscorn.
  • p. 22. l. 26. add divorce.
  • p. 23. l. 9. for not r.readthat.

  • p. 30. l. 4. for desire r.read disswade.
  • p. 31. S.scene 22. l. 1. add at the end of the line ever I.
  • p. 32. S.scene 25. ult.ultimatus
    add maturity of time; yet what it doth afford, although but bracks or mosse; if you command, I shall
    present them to you.
  • p. 38. S.scene 32. l. 10. for her r.read he.
  • p. 51. S.scene 13. l. 16. to shot add fire.
  • p. 58. S.scene 18.
    l. 5. blot out noth.
  • p. 60. S.scene 20. l. 13. for kinds r.read kindness.
  • p. 62. l. 22. for shames r.read shun:
  • p. 73. l. 4.
    for verifie r.readrarifie.
  • p. 82. l. 9. for the which r.readwhence there.
  • p. 83. l. 38. for undissoulable r.read indissoluble.
  • p. 74. l. 9. for can r.readcon.
  • p. 86. S.scene 11. l. 9. prefix Importunate.
  • p. 89. l. 5. for fixt, r:.read fit.
  • S. 14.
    l. 12. for you. r.read them
  • p. 101. l. 9. for seemly, r.read seemingly.
  • l. 21. for displease, r.read please.
  • p. 105.
    l. 6. for nundenyable, r.readundecayable.
  • p. 125. l. 20. for Jeerals, r.readGirls.
  • p. 128. S.scene 4. l. 10. for keep,
    r.read peep.
  • p. 144. l. 12. for last r.read lost.
  • p. 154. l. 25. for evil r.readrule.
  • p. 157. l. 32. for so r.read I wish.
  • p. 160.
    l. 3. for right r.readfright.
  • l. 45. for glances r.read glancer.
  • p. 162. S.scene 7. l. 16. for noble r.read unnoble.
  • p. 185.
    S. 3. l. 12. for virtue r.readbeauty.
  • p. 186. S.scene 4. l. 13. for corporal r.read corpulent.
  • p. 205. l. 29. add is.
  • p. 208.
    l. 5. for ap’d r.readlapp’d.
  • p. 220. l. 8. for back holders r.readBatchelors.
  • p. 224. l. 21. for my r.readone.
  • p. 225.
    S. 14. l. 15. for loose r.read too loose.
  • p. 266. l. 8. for your r.readthat.
  • p. 279. S.scene 32. l. 15. for they r.read have.

  • p. 296. l. 3. for weakens the r.readweakness then.
  • p. 329. S.scene 6. l. 21. prefix Bonit.
  • p. 333. S.scene 12. ult.ultimus for
    virtues r.read virtuosa.
  • p. 337. l. 23. for courage r.readcivil.
  • p. 355. S.scene 31. l. 9. for your r.read my.
  • p. 383. S.scene 14. l.
    16. for inthrown r.read inthroned.
  • p. 529. l. 26. for Country, r.readCourtly.
  • p. 531. l. 16. for ring. r.readwring.
  • p.
    539. l. 23. for courteous, r.readcovetous; for she, r.read peevish.
  • p. 547. S.scene 27. l. 6. for peace, r.read pious.
  • p. 554. l. 3.
    for fixt, r.readfit.
  • p. 368. S.scene 13. l. 7. for lifferous r.read Zephyrus.
  • p. 573. S.scene 19. l. 19. for guts r.read gates.
  • p. 587.l. 6. for
    ingenious r.readEngine.
  • p. 592. l. 8. for tripping r.readpitching.
  • p. 633. S.scene 21. l. 5. blot out Nell Careless.
  • p. 644. l. 22.
    For them r.readthemselves.
  • p. 664. S.scene 14. l. 27. For devering r.read delivering.
  • p. 666. S.scene 16. l. 22. blot out or notches.

These be the most considerable errors of the Press, which make any alteration in the
sense, or may occasion a mistake in the Readers; many other of lesse note are obvious
to the eye; as misspellings, omissions, misplacing of Letters, syllables, and sometimes
words: but all these are too numerous to be here set down, and so inconsiderable, that
they may be by every common Reader at once observed and corrected.